The Most Powerful Tool

As April continues to be unrolled before us it is uncertain what is ahead. For those of us who are either part of the vulnerable population or caring for someone who is among the most vulnerable - the days are more uncertain. On one hand, many caregivers are used to some level of social isolation. But what little liberty we have had has been taken away. It's easy, and natural to experience a sense of loss during this time.

This morning, as I was preparing for the two daily devotions I try to do, I found myself in Colossians 4 and verse 2. Paul encouraged the believers to devote themselves to prayer. He also told them to be alert and diligent about it. Well, it's likely that there is a lot more prayer going on in our world today than there was before Covid-19. But Paul gave another aspect of prayer I found beneficial.

The apostle Paul said to pray - with an attitude of thanksgiving. Now, giving thanks may not be at the forefront of our minds right now - especially while feeling such losses. But it is a powerful component. It's not a manipulative strategy to try and get the answer you want to your prayer. On the contrary, it changes your attitude. Being thankful is a powerful tool that can change our dreary thoughts into more pleasant ones.

I know we have a lot nagging at our hearts, minds, and emotions right now. But if we can purposefully find things to be thankful for we can make our day better. Are your lights on? Do you have tv? Do you have internet? Is there food in your house? I'd say start with these if you are looking for a way to be thankful today. Don't let the seriousness of our circumstances drag you down and out. Bring all your requests to God - but bring them with a thankful heart. It will change our perspective and attitude.

Today, I purpose to be thankful. I'll start with salvation and I'll include the truth that God is still on the throne and His kingdom is not shaken by the Coronavirus. Then, I'll thank Him that I have a roof over my head (today), I have internet so I can stay in touch with others. I'll be thankful for the food in my kitchen even if it's not what I want to eat. I'll let Him lift the weighty burden off my heart and mind by thanking Him today. Will you join me?

Only Today

David says in Psalm 37:8 - do not fret. He goes on to say it will lead to evil doing. He has just said to cease from anger and forsake wrath. When emotions run high, as they are doing for many right now both caregivers and non-caregivers, anger comes easily. Rightly so as our world has been turned upside down.

As a caregiver, I find I have a short fuse and I have to guard my heart diligently lest I blow up at little things. I understand that is part of the package, it's normal, right? Yes. But it doesn't have to be that way.

While we are all on shut-down mode and the governor of our state lengthened the time we must stay home since those we care for are vulnerable - it can make for a short fuse. But honestly, I'm not sure what I fear most - being confined to the house longer or being allowed to go out. Will I ever be able to go out with peace of mind again? And just like that - I'm fretting over things I cannot see - don't know - and have to have time to play out. :-)

David said not to fret. I'm finding it is easier said than done. There are so many uncertainties. But I take a deep breath and consider only today. We cannot live more than one day at a time and we don't have to face more than one day at a time. Mentally, I walk through this day and the tasks that lay before me. I think I've got this. I can do just this. Jesus reminded us of that.

In Matthew 6:25-34, Jesus addresses anxiety. Wait. They didn't have the media to inundate them with negatives all day. They didn't have a Facebook feed to sow dissension and fear all day long. They didn't have the fake news. lol. Yet they were anxious about their days too. In verse 34, Jesus says, each day has enough trouble of its own. And to that, I say a hearty amen!

I encourage you to read this short passage in Matthew which is part of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount. His words are still applicable and powerful today. He uses some form of the word worry five times in this short passage, and mostly He's explaining why we don't need to.

Today, I will determine to not fret about the future. I will determine to set my heart and mind on spiritual things and acknowledge that He has got this. He has got me. He has got my loved ones. I'll shun worrying and fretting and embrace peace today. Will you join me?

Swallowed Up!

Caregiving isn't for the faint of heart. Who am I talking to? Of course, you know that! And as if caregiving wasn't enough on our plates, Covid19 has to raise its ugly head. For those of us with loved ones in facilities, it can be extremely difficult since there is no visitation allowed. On top of the normal day-to-day tasks and chores of caregiving comes more concern and trying to find ways to stay connected with our loved ones. At times, it can feel like the world has swallowed us whole.

David was in a fix when he penned Psalm 57. In verse three he says that God reproaches the one who would swallow me up. As I read that this morning, I realized that is part of how I feel. It's like I've been swallowed whole by the situation. It can be stifling at times. But as caregivers - we just keep pressing on. Because that's what we do.

There's a whole range of emotions caregivers already deal with, many on a daily basis. Fear. Dread. Grief and living grief. But now we have extra emotions warring at our soul. There may be sadness and feelings of loss over the lifestyle we did have. I think that's all a normal response and there's no shame in it. We don't have to hide how we feel. We can identify it and deal with it. And let God have it so He can carry us through this difficult time.

The next part of the verse is going to be my prayer today as I navigate through this new level of grief, sadness, and loss. David says that God will send forth His mercy and His truth. Boy, if the world doesn't need a lot of both of those today! I need a dose of those today too! How about you?

You see, as caregivers, we might have a slight advantage over others right now. We already know that God carries us when we just don't have the strength.  We have learned that He brings comfort on the hardest days and speaks peace during the longest nights. We know that He is the "enough" we need to make it one more day. Many of us have mastered running to Him with our cares, worries, and stressors. And we know what it's like to crawl up under the protection of His wings when there are no more words to say and no more tears to cry. He is our refuge, strength, and keeper of our souls.

Today, I will meditate on being under the shadow of His wings. I will purpose to trust Him - just for today with all the added baggage. My heart will pursue that secret place with Him where there is indescribable peace and comfort. I will stay still and hidden in Him for today as I trust Him to carry me just today. Will you join me?

Hand in Hand

One of my favorite run-to scriptures is Psalm 61. In the '70s, we sang the first four verses of this psalm. It's a great way to memorize scriptures, by the way! In the first two verses, David is crying out to God. He is overwhelmed, something the caregiver knows well. Every day can be overwhelming just normally. This is even harder during a pandemic. We already had enough on our plate, right?

But after David makes his plea, he begins to make a declaration. This is a pattern he follows in many psalms. In this psalm, it seems he reminds himself of how God has been a shelter for him over the years. He says, for You have been a shelter for me, a strong tower from the enemy. Maybe David is reminding himself that he's run to God many times for protection from the enemy.

Maybe it's a good idea to remind ourselves how God has been our refuge and shelter many times before. I know I have run to Him many times in my lifetime. And He's always faithful - He's always there to pick me up and tell me it's going to be okay. After thinking about how many times God has already been there for us - it's easy to purpose to trust Him again, isn't it?

In verse 4, David makes a personal declaration - He says I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. His heart is purposed that He will trust God again - and forever! It seems like abide and trust go hand in hand. I'm not sure we can truly abide if we don't fully trust. 

When we trust Him, we run to Him. Then we must stay there. I want to live in the shadow of His wings - I want to abide forever in the shelter of His love. But if trust is lacking - I won't be able to stay, will I?

Today, I will purpose to abide in Him and continue to trust Him. My meditation will be on what it means to abide (live) with Him. I'll focus my heart on fully trusting Him - today and forever, as David said. I will learn to abide and to trust - will you join me?

Whatever Lies Ahead

I was reading some of the OT prophets over the weekend. As I was spending time in prayer, the scripture out of Habakkuk came to my mind and I whispered it in my prayers. In the last part of verse 2, the prophet says, revive Your work in the midst of the years, oh Lord. That was my prayer and later became my meditation.

We are living through some tough times, and I'm seeing lots of whining come across social media channels. I'm certainly not unsympathetic, but I'm like you've been home for two whole weeks... seriously? I recall when I became a caregiver and the social isolation was one of the most difficult parts. And honestly, even as caregivers, we can mourn the loss of the freedom we have enjoyed - whatever level of freedom we had, even if it was minimal.

But there's always some good news, and I found it in the latter part of this same chapter of Habakkuk. Verses 17 and 18 say this:

Though the fig tree does not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines;

Though the labor of the olive may fail, and the fields yield no food;

Though the flock may be cut off from the fold, and there be no herd in the stalls--

Yet, I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.....

There is so much in these two verses - and we are living some of it right now. Just a few weeks ago we could go to the store and buy eggs if we needed them. Now there is a limit - if they are available at all... things like that are just crazy. But when I think about our situation - and the trouble so many are facing - I have to find peace in this - our salvation is sure. 

We've talked a lot about how as caregivers we didn't lose any of our promises. Our righteousness is secure in Him - there isn't an exempt card from Christianity - we still get ALL the benefits and we still have ALL the responsibilities. Nothing shakes His kingdom - and that Kingdom is inside us. Nothing in the spiritual realm has changed - His word still stands secure. God didn't change His mind on anything when this man-made virus started in China and moved across the globe. He didn't take a deep breath and say, Oh no. 

We know as caregivers that it took us some time to figure that out - because for some of us - our worlds were greatly shaken. Our faith was shaken. Mine was redefined. We know God carries us through those tough times- He continues to speak, to care, to watch, and love us just like always.

Today, no matter what lies ahead - I'm going to trust God. I will rejoice in my salvation because it's not from this earth and nothing on earth can shake it or change it. My meditations will be on staying hidden in Him - for today. I'll trust Him just for today. I will wait for Him today. I will thank Him for being my soul's anchor - today and for whatever lies ahead. Will you join me?

How to Care for a Loved One from Afar

As caregivers, we want to do our best for our senior loved ones. When we’re stuck living far apart, however, it can feel impossible to give them the care they need. Fortunately, there are many things you can do for your loved one no matter where you are.

Thanks to our ever-connected world, you can give them the gift of care despite all the distance between you. It’s hard to be far apart, but thanks to technology, we can be together no matter where we are. Here are a few great ways to be a caregiver from afar:

Help Around the House

When you're an in-person caregiver, it's easy to help your loved one with household chores and maintenance. Being far away obviously makes this more challenging, but that doesn't mean you're at a loss. Making slight home modifications and outsourcing services can be great ways to help your senior loved one get the assistance they need.

For example, is your loved one’s laundry room set up in the basement? Navigating stairs gets trickier (and more dangerous) with age, and lugging laundry up and down the stairs can be risky. To eliminate this hazard, find a way to have their washer and dryer installed on the first floor. You can also install grab bars in the bathrooms, add improved lighting and remove trip hazards like rugs and cords.

When it comes to their home’s exterior, is your senior overwhelmed by spring and summer lawn maintenance and watering? In addition to hiring a lawn care service, consider having sprinklers installed, so they have one less thing to manage. In Oklahoma City, it averages around $2,644 to have this kind of system installed. You can easily get online quotes from local firms to do the work.

Besides hiring services to help with nominal tasks, consider setting your loved one up with grocery delivery. This can be especially handy if they no longer drive and primarily use public transportation. Most grocery stores these days offer delivery, and you can order everything your loved one needs online and have it sent straight to their door.

Stay in Touch

Long-distance caregivers often worry about their loved ones feeling lonely, as older people often suffer from social isolation. Fortunately, staying in touch in a variety of ways gives you and your loved one a sense of connection, and helps prevent them from feeling like they’re all alone. Phone calls, emails, and letters are all excellent ways to stay in touch. Also, if your loved one doesn’t have a smartphone, consider setting your loved one up with a tablet or video chat system so you can see each other while you talk. This gives you both the chance to have a face-to-face connection, and it can help you see for yourself if there are any problems like a disheveled appearance or a messy home.

Get Allies Nearby

Finally, staying in touch with your loved one’s neighbors and nearby friends is an excellent tool for the long-distance caregiver. Those who see your loved one in person and even on a regular basis can help determine problems early on that you might miss from afar. Ask your loved one to give your phone number to the neighbors or some friends, and touch base with them regularly. They may be able to clue you in if your loved one is experiencing property neglect or other signs that something bigger is going on.

Caring for someone from a distance can be difficult, but there are plenty of ways to make it work. You will be amazed at everything you can do for your loved one without being able to physically be there. With the right game plan, you can be the caregiver you want to be, no matter where you are.

Photo Credit: Unsplash

One Day in the Grave

Today is Saturday, and tomorrow is when most of our culture celebrates the Resurrection. I say it needs to be something we celebrate daily in our lives, but corporately, tomorrow is the day. If we think about it, today is the only whole day Jesus spent in the tomb. He was crucified and buried on Friday - and rose on Sunday. It's the only 24-hour day the earth was silent.

Imagine how the disciples were feeling on this day. Jesus had been their hope, they had pictured Him setting up a physical kingdom and now their dreams and all they had invested in for the last three years was gone. They were scared. Most likely, they were silent. Sometimes as a caregiver, I've experienced pain beyond words. There just isn't always a good way to articulate feelings or emotions, especially when they are so deep in our souls.

Silence isn't always bad. I go back to Psalm 46:10 where God encourages the psalmist to be still and know I am God. Sounds simple, huh? But being still and quiet isn't always easy in our busy digitally connected lives, is it? 

As I was sharing video devotions this morning on Facebook Live, I realized that sometimes, being quiet and acknowledging that He is God - is an act of worship. Our minds are being inundated with information day in and day out. We are stressed beyond what we ever imagined and as caregivers, we can go numb. In some ways - we are in a state of shock.

But God is still God and acknowledging that when the world is spinning around in sporadic circles - is worship. There's no fanfare, no entertainment value, no song and dance. But it's worship. Religion wants us to think worship looks like a well-orchestrated song or show. But in that moment that we quiet our souls and our minds and just say You are God. That's an expression of worship - pure and simple. But powerful too.

Today, I will try to quiet my very busy mind - and I will stop the worry and anxious thoughts that He knows so well - and I will just say: You are still God. You are still my God! My meditation will be on His existence and I'll focus on that instead of my own existence for today. I'll wait for His peace to fill me and I will embrace it and let it rule in my heart today. Will you join me?