Waters of Caregiving

 I think about Isaiah 43 a lot. It's where God is promising that He will be with us through fires and floods. Not only is He with us - but He carries us through and brings us out! I liken the waters to the many aspects of caregiving. It can be so easy to be swept away in the "waters" of caregiving. We can find comfort and grace just in knowing that He doesn't abandon us to our very full days. Instead, He walks (or swims) through them with us!

So, this morning, I found this verse in Psalm 18. In verse 16, David says, He sent from above, He took me; He drew me out of many waters. (NKJV) I kind of pictured myself as a drowned rat being fished out of rapidly running water. Lol. I know; my imagination is on overdrive sometimes! 

I began meditating on this verse and how He "drew me out" - That would mean that He didn't allow the waters to overtake me or to suck me under the violent flow. It would also mean that the flow of the waters no longer had control over my destination. Don't you love those times in your day when you know God just reaches in and pulls you right out of the overwhelming "stuff"?

In the next couple of verses, David goes on to talk about God's deliverance. He describes being delivered from things too strong for him to deal with. That would be David - you know, the warrior, king, victor David. The same dude who defeated Goliath and took off his head by the power and help of the Lord. He still felt overwhelmed sometimes, even though he had won many battles. We all know life is made up of numerous battles, some we fight over and over again. But God continues to "draw us out" and set our feet on solid ground. 

He is "here" for us - wherever our "here" has us today. He will not abandon our souls or let them be overcome by the many waters of caregiving. He steps in, just in time, and rescues our souls. He fills us with peace, protects us, and carries us through everything we face every day as a caregiver. I am thankful.

Today, I will take a few minutes to look back over my own caregiving journey. I'll think about all the fears I had when it started and how unsettled I was. Then, I'll meditate on how He has carried me through the many waters of caregiving and helped me deal with the extreme as well as the day-to-days. I'll make room for lots of gratitude in my heart, and I'll embrace the spirit of thanksgiving for all that He has done so far. I'll hope for tomorrow as I trust Him with today. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                          

Midnights & Mornings

 Last night was one of those longer nights. The good thing was that there wasn't anything seriously wrong, but my son didn't sleep well and fussed a lot. It's just a little cough and some sinus stuff, thankfully. But it's those long nights that can get to us as caregivers - as if the daytime wasn't enough, right? When we get up in the morning after a long night, it makes for a longer day too. For many of us, it's far too frequent.

So this morning, as I found myself reading through Psalm 63, I found a little comfort in the fact that David had some late nights, long nights, and early mornings too! I wonder if it's wrong to enjoy realizing someone else had it tough too. Lol. Let's dive into this short psalm.

The subtitle lets us know that David was in the wilderness. He didn't have the comforts of home. Basically, he was camping, which can be fun if you're not being chased by the king's army. In verse 1, David says early will I seek You! I think there could be a dual meaning there. At first, I took it to mean early in the morning, before the day gets going; David was seeking God's guidance, direction, wisdom, and presence. But I think it would still be correct to assume that David was also choosing to seek God early in a problem. Either way  - there are huge benefits!

Later in verses 6 and 7, David says that he remembers God when he lays down at night and he meditates on Him in the night watches. I don't know about you, but when I am up at night with caregiving, I spend a lot of time seeking God. I pray for peace, wisdom, direction, and HELP! Then in the morning, I'm still seeking Him. So basically, from midnights to mornings to midnights, the caregiver's soul is following closely after God. That's in verse 8 of Psalm 63. 

I think this psalm makes it plain that David was going to seek God and follow closely after Him - no matter what time of day or night, no matter what was going on around him, and no matter what period. We can have the same resolve. Here we are taking care of another whole person, and our hearts are still seeking Him, midnights and mornings.

Today, I will reaffirm my resolve to follow close behind God because His right hand upholds me. (v.8) I'll remind myself that God has carried me this far, and He's not clocking out to go home, He's still got me. And He will continue to uphold me through long days and nights. He never clocks out. He never takes a moment off, He is our constant companion, and He's got us. So, I can remind myself that I can trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                                                

Just Dust

  I went in my son's room this morning to turn some music on for him. As I looked at his shriveled hands, withdrawn arms, and motionless legs, I thought about how much I love him even in his "broken" state. My life revolves around him, quite literally. My thoughts quickly moved to God and His love for us - even in our "broken" states. Maybe our lives are far less than what the norm would call "perfect." But God loves us - right where we are and just how we are. I picture my crippled soul continuing to look for and seek Him. And in my imagination - I see His heart well pleased.

Psalm 103:13-14 says, The Lord is like a father to His children, tender and compassionate to those who fear Him. For He understands how weak we are; He knows we are only dust. (NLT) Today, I'm just overwhelmed by His tender mercies. He sees my brokenness, my pain, and the tears I hide from everyone else. He sees the tears I refuse to let go of, and He just can't help Himself. He loves us and has tender mercy for us.I have trouble imagining that God becomes overwhelmed with emotions toward me - like I do toward my son. But He does. 

Without the breath that God breathed into Adam - we're just a pile of dirt. But He still comes for us, loves us, comforts us, and keeps our souls. That's somewhat amazing and overwhelming to grasp. But I like it. :-)

Caregiving is not easy. Ever. It can be painful, frustrating, and nearly debilitating. But God isn't afraid to get "dirt-y." I see my life as such a mess, and I make it even messier sometimes. (LOL) But He won't wash His hands of it all  - He's always ready and willing to intervene for my soul's sake. Just like I love my son just like he is - God loves us just like we are, right where we are. He won't avoid us, shun us, or hide from our pain. This song just came on my son's tv "I love you just the way you are." So appropriate for this moment I am having. I love my son just the way he is - and God loves us just the way we are. We don't have to do anything - God can't help Himself, He loves us.

Today, I will rest in His love. When I question how God could possibly love me - I'll look at my son and realize that God feels those same emotions for me. I'll remind myself that He is totally overcome with compassion, grace, mercy, and love for me. So, I can rest in Him and trust Him for one more day (even if He needs to carry me). Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

If you enjoy these devotionals, I have others! I've expanded my bookstore on Amazon. My devotionals are available in Kindle or print format. The new Bible study guides are now available on Kindle and in print! Check out my growing bookstore: 

I also recently opened my own bookstore. I'm presently filling it up with my books - check out the ones I have available in eBook format. You can download them and read them on your phone! Dove's Fire Ministries Bookstore.

Can't Deny or Explain!

 We have all been through many trials in our lives. We are either going through something, just coming out of something, or are headed right into a new "something." As caregivers, we live in a trial. It's not that caregiving isn't beautiful, because it is. But it's also trying, rigorous, and tiring. It's an always-on thing - many of us don't get breaks at all. Personally, I have to pay a sitter to get a break, and quite honestly, I can't afford what I need. Lol. 

But here's the thing. No matter how difficult or easy a day may be - God walks through it with us. He never packs it all up and says, "I'm outa here." I'm crazy enough; I wouldn't blame Him if He did! Lol. His mercy can reach into those long, dark nights as well as sustain us through difficult days. There's no way for an honest person to deny His faithfulness, His mercy, His sustaining grace, and His ever-abiding presence. But that doesn't mean we can explain it either.

I honestly do not know how He has sustained me on this nearly 15-year caregiving journey. I've tried to give up numerous times. I've even tried to quit praying. That usually only lasts for a few seconds before I realize I'm talking to God again through my tears or pain. Yet He is faithful. That just blows my mind!

I can't deny His grace has been sufficient, just like He promised Paul in 2 Corinthians 12. But I certainly can't explain how His grace steps in just when I need it and carries me through another moment. (I would say day - but sometimes, as you know, it's moment by moment!)

Today, I will remind myself of how God has carried me through these years. I will quiet my heart and rest in His love, letting His grace take over. I will meditate on all He's brought me through so far - and then use it to "encourage myself," since I know He's still got me. I'll meditate on how He doesn't have the capacity to leave me (like people do). And I'll rest in the truth that He's got me and He's not going to let me go. Not today - not any day! So, I will trust Him with today - will you join me?

The Practical Side of Caregiving

 This week, I've been reading the book of Acts. I am enjoying the journey of the early church. Can you imagine what it would be like if your church saw 5000 people saved in a day? Mass chaos would ensue as leadership tried to figure out how to serve that many people! It'd be great and difficult at the same time - kind of like caregiving. Lol.

But yesterday, I got stuck in Acts 9 thinking about a practical caregiving issue. In verse 32, we read that Peter was traveling around and encouraging all the new believers. He came to the town of Lydda. Verse 33 says in the NLT, There he (Peter) met a man named Aeneas, who had been paralyzed and bedridden for eight years. Now, the next verses talk about how Peter proclaimed healing, and the man just got up! That's so amazing. But my brain got stuck on some of the practical parts.

Aeneas was paralyzed and bedridden. My mind compared the situation to my son, of course, even though he's not "paralyzed." I started wondering how this man's caregivers kept him alive for 8 years! I'm not being facetious, either. They had none of our modern conveniences. They didn't have a hospital bed - or beds like anything we have today. We know as caregivers that preventing bed sores is a huge issue. How did they do that? The man would have laid on the ground a mat made of straw or maybe a pad of some sort with feathers in it...? I don't know, but it was an amazing feat that someone who is not named here took care of him for 8 years.

They didn't have wheelchairs, standing frames, washable waterproof pads, or briefs. They didn't even have wipes! (One thing I sure wish I had invested in!!!) The caregivers didn't even have gloves. I just want to applaud his caregivers because they were real troopers.

But I also want to applaud YOU! Caregiving is not easy, even with all the supplies and resources we have today. It's emotionally draining and physically exhausting. Yet, here you are, grabbing hope to make another day. You are still seeking God in the middle of the battle, the loneliness, the wilderness, fire, or flood! Yes, we may feel all those in a day, or in a morning, or in an hour. Lol. But we continue seeking God's help. I believe God honors that.

Today, I will start by being so thankful for all my "tools," from wipes to briefs, bed pads to wheelchairs, high-speed blenders, and standing frames! And then, I'll be thankful for God's sustaining grace that carries me each and every day. I'll remind myself that God is very much aware of the practical side of caregiving, and He continues to watch over me and carry me when needed. I'll set my heart on Him today and trust Him for just one more day. Will you join me?

Piece by Piece

 The road to caregiving looks different for each caregiver. For some, it involves watching an elderly loved one slowly slip into dementia. For others, it involved a frantic call in the middle of the night. No matter how we got "here," our world can feel fractured and anything but whole. Our BC (before caregiving) lives get left far behind, and many times we struggle to keep it together mentally and emotionally. It takes its toll.

But then there is the coolest thing. God's not afraid of our brokenness. He's not afraid to work with every little piece. In my mind's eye, I see my life shattered and scattered all over the floor (at least the life I used to know). But God picks up each piece and holds it close as He carefully looks at it. I imagine Him thinking, Oh, I know where this piece goes. And He begins to put the puzzle together piece by piece. Turns out that it's my heart.

I've been trying to "work the puzzle" without a view of what the final product should look like. So, I struggle to find which piece goes where. However, God knows the final picture, so it's easier to piece it together like a big Jigsaw puzzle. We can be sure that He is working toward wholeness as He gingerly pieces our hearts together.

And you know what? He's not afraid of any of the pieces - no matter how many there are. No piece is too small or too large for Him to pick up and attend to, as He literally pulls our souls back together. I love that God is not afraid of our messy lives. He not only sees the final picture, He can't wait to get us there!

Today, I will remind myself that God is in control. I'll try not to worry about the mess I see and feel. Instead, I will work on resting in Him and letting Him do all the work to piece it together. I'll also tell myself that it is okay to not know what the final picture looks like. Today, I will remind myself that my job is to just trust Him for each step, each piece, and each second of today. Will you join me?

Some Things Never Change

 This afternoon, I was working through a bunch of emotional stuff. You'd think by 62 years of age, I'd have a few more things figured out. But here I am, sorting through the same ole stuff again and again. As caregivers, we deal with so many things that seem somewhat cyclical - loneliness, fear, overwhelm.... fill in the blank. I thought to myself, some things never change. 

Usually, when we use or hear this phrase, it's referring to something somewhat negative. Many times, I've witnessed the shaking of the head as someone says some things never change. But after I heard that thought run through my brain, I erased the negative connotation immediately. Perhaps it's true that some of the day-to-days of caregiving don't get much better; maybe they don't change at all. But I began to run through quite an extensive list of some things that never change - and it's a good thing.

I started with grace. God's grace never changes. It hasn't changed one iota since He told Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:9 My grace is sufficient for you. Some things never change. We can count on God's grace being sufficient for us today, the same as it was yesterday, and it will be again tomorrow. 

Secondly, I thought of God's mercy. He continues to extend His mercy to us - no matter what life brings. No matter what we do right, wrong, or indifferent, His mercy sustains us. Then I thought of His love. I am pretty sure if anyone has ever tested His love - it's me. There are those long nights when I go off on an emotional rant, dumping all the junk that's in my heart (fear, doubt, sadness, grief - and the list goes on) right out at His feet. And He just keeps loving me - why - I have no idea. But it's only a matter of minutes, even during the darkest night, before His love can break through the hardened outer layers of my heart and bring reassurance of His love. No matter how ugly the cry - or loud the shouting, His love is still poured out in my heart.

His ever-abiding presence also made the some things never change list. He never says I'm too crazy for Him. He doesn't pack up and move away. He just remains and remains faithful. Every long, dark, hopeless night - He's right there. Every day that has brought good news or bad - He's right there. Whether I stumble or fall, He stays. Man, I'm so glad that some things never change. The coolest thing is I can't do one thing to make these things change. He won't leave us - He won't take back His mercy or grace. And He won't stop loving us.

Today, I will rejoice in these things that will never change. I'll raise my tear-stained face and rough, caregiving hands to Him, even when my strength is gone. I'll thank Him for scooping me up out of the mire of life when I just don't have the strength to stand. My meditations will be on how He carries me when my strength runs low, and I'll thank Him for one more day when some things never change. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

If you enjoy these devotionals, I have others! I've expanded my bookstore on Amazon. My devotionals are available in Kindle or print format. The new Bible study guides are now available on Kindle and in print! Check out my growing bookstore: 

I also recently opened my own bookstore. I'm presently filling it up with my books - check out the ones I have available in eBook format. You can download them and read them on your phone! Dove's Fire Ministries Bookstore.