Daily Devotions for Caregivers

I am resolved that there are just some things I will never understand. The last three weeks have been very rough. Two friends have died and gone on to their eternal reward, my son's botched surgery, near death and hospital stay and Thanksgiving without family have all taken a toll on my emotions. Last night I was reading a post by someone whose son suffered a brain injury just a few weeks ago and he's making a remarkable recovery. I'm very happy for the family. But I have all these whys ? Why does one recover and get to go on with life and another doesn't? this just added to my frustrations and perplexities. I saw phrases that kind of made me mad. People say God is good.   And then they say God was with him.  Those phrases we tend to only use when things go our way or when we get what we wanted. Are they saying God wasn't with my son? I know they don't mean it - but since I didn't get the same wonderful results is God not  good? Was he not  with Chris ...

Be anxious for nothing.  That's what Paul told the believers in Philippians 4:6. Obviously they didn't have a handicap van and people parking in the way of the lift in a clearly marked restricted area! (People wrongfully taking handicap spots is one of my pet peeves btw.) As a caregiver you know how anxious life can be at times, or all the times sometimes. Surely Paul would rethink these instructions were he here today, or maybe he wouldn't.  Every single day there are constant opportunities to be anxious, sometimes it even feels like we are living anxious. If we do not guard ourselves we can be one huge bundle of anxious as we walk through the day. And it can take the smallest thing to cause us to explode. One of the strategies I use for dealing with anxious thoughts is to turn them into prayers. Sometimes, when I remember, I turn them into thankful prayers. Then not only do I have peace in my heart, but His peace invades it as well. And when I give Him these crazy, ...

As caregivers we are able to get in there and get things done. It sort of comes with the territory. No matter what our basic personality is, in just a short time of caregiving is good schooling on this topic. We learn rather quickly that in many cases, advocating for our loved one means rolling up our sleeves and getting 'er done. Too bad there's not a Caregivers   University w here we can go to learn the skills needed. We could get a diploma once we learned it all and of course passed our internship  where we learned all the ropes using a hands-on approach. Of course I am speaking tongue-in-cheek as it would be impossible for someone to teach us what we've learned. Of course there is no such school and we are not going to get a diploma for our learning. But we do a lot of learning about a lot of things once we become a caregiver, including things about ourselves. Even though I'm pretty high strung and hyper most of the time I let a lot of things slide as a person...

When I first brought my son home I soon realized that a good night's sleep was a thing of the past. It was like having an infant again where even if they sleep well, you wake up with every little sound they make. I finally adjusted and relaxed a bit until now I do get some sleep. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm pretty high strung and very active inside and out. I hate to sleep - I know I need it but it seems like such a waste of time. Do you know what all I could get done in that 6 hours? Yes, 6 hours, that's what I try to give myself because I just can't stand to sleep away one-third of the day. Actually, sleep and rest are two different things and as I have battled my own medical conditions of late (perhaps brought on by lack of sleep? *smile*) I have learned the importance of sleeping and resting. Sleep is the way we rest our bodies so they remain strong and fight off disease. But rest  is an inside thing. Maybe that's why Jesus said in Matthew 11:29 t...

Have you ever had someone tell you they admire you and how they think you, as a caregiver, are so strong ? It happens all the time - but I really don't feel strong at all. It feels  like I am just surviving and not doing that very well some days. And then sometimes, like this weekend while on our first big walking adventure - I notice people looking at us with such sympathy - like they feel so sorry for us and our situation. How people see a caregiver relies a lot on the types of life experiences they have had themselves. Maybe they have had their shot at caregiving and they feel like it takes an enormous amount of strength. Or maybe some have never been in the position and think there's no way they could do it. (I was in that class BC - before caregiving. ) The truth is we may not feel strong at all - but others likely see us that way. We know as caregivers that we have moments where we can take on the world. These usually occur after winning a loooong fight with a healt...

Have you ever twisted a dish rag to wring all the water out of it? Have you ever felt like    a wrung out dish rag that's had all the water rung out of it? That describes my last day or two for sure and unfortunately describes the caregiver at the end of all too many days. We talk a lot about the numerous tasks we have to do everyday and how adding one more no matter how small thing can tip the whole boat. Sometimes it tips us physically other times it can tip us emotionally. Either one can be detrimental. But you know what? Because we are caregivers - we just keep going, and going, and going. My already busy days got messed up by a minor wrist injury that occurred during my taekwondo session last week. Why does it take an act of God and congress to make a doctor's appointment and grab a quick xray? A busy day gets more hurried finding sitters and making arrangements to take care of these little extras . Eventually, I sat down with a cup of coffee and a big "Whew!" ...

Caregivers typically have long lists of things that need to be done every day. If you think about it, they are taking care of another whole person and for many who take care of an individual who is total care it means doing all the basics at least twice every day; once for yourself and once for your loved one. Some mornings we can get up ready to take on the world and get a day's worth of chores done. Other days we can wake up feeling behind before we even get started. I wonder if Moses ever felt that way. He could be considered a caregiver of sorts. He had millions of people that he was leading across to the Promised Land. They all had to be fed, clothed and cared for. I can't imagine what Moses dealt with on a daily basis. And while he didn't have to meet some of their basic physical needs, they looked to him for direction, sustenance, and guidance. I think what has amazed me about Moses' character was that no matter how rough it got and how crazy the Israelites act...

When my son was first injured and we were living in the hospital, I knew I had to find a way to get adequate exercise so I took up running. I thought it was an inexpensive sport that I could virtually do anywhere. It's been sort of a lifeline for me over the years. Running has become what I do  to deal with the difficulty of caregiving. It helps me physically but it also helps me beat depression and clears my brain. It's really about the only thing I do, and the only reason I get out.  Yesterday, I ran my 16th half marathon. I proudly added my finisher's medal to my overloaded rack on the wall. But I had something happen during my race that had to do with caregiving. As I neared mile 5 of the course there was a drumline playing. It totally caught me off guard. My son was the drum caption and the center snare for his college drumline before his accident. Seeing a drumline live brought back a flood of memories and I collapsed in tears. Eventually, I gathered myself and cont...

Well, of course you are! And the birds are still singing too! These two things are sure signs that God is still at work and has not forgotten us. Matthew 6:25-33 is a familiar and wonderful passage about God's concern and care for us, His children. He explains that we cannot add one little inch to our height or one hour to our lives by worrying about it. Of course, we actually know the opposite. Worrying effects our body in very negative ways and it can actually mean a shorter life if we spend lots of time worrying. I found out early on in my life of caregiving that worry didn't help anything! It didn't bring in money, make my son better, or for that matter, make any part of the day better. And in this passage, we are reminded that God sees all of that ...and more! He is fully aware of our troublesome situations, He is aware of the loneliness, and He is not ignorant of our struggles. If He takes such good care of birds and grass why would we think He would do less for u...

For the caregiver thoughts can run away very quickly; and that's just planning out today! Early in the morning I sit and sort of plan the day, don't you? My mind goes through all the things that need to be done just to get through the day. Of course number one is taking care of our loved one. Everything else has to revolve around that...if it gets done at all! There's feeding, changing, transferring, making sure they are comfortable, any medications given, dressing...and that's just a few of the things for every day. Don't forget all the arguing you do with the medical profession - pharmacists, therapist (or the lack thereof..)....That doesn' count all the surprises that may come up in a day. And even within the best laid out schedule there has to be much flexibility as you never know what a day will bring! Add to that just the daily stuff - cooking, laundry, housework, managing finances...and for me - trying to secure enough work online to pay the bills...a...