Daily Devotions for Caregivers

  It's easy to feel all alone as caregivers. This is even more often the case during the pandemic. We can feel like we are carrying the load of caregiving all by ourselves. And a lot of times, we are. It makes sense that we feel we are alone - when we are alone. Many caregivers have spouses, friends, relatives, aides, and others who help along the way. I think the worst loneliness is felt when we feel alone - even though we are with others. For me personally, if I am in a social gathering (mostly online of late!), I still feel like I stick out like a sore thumb. There is often casual conversation about things people are doing, where they are going, and even daily routines that are far different for caregivers. Sometimes we feel alone just because our lifestyle can be so different. Other times we feel alone because we are alone. Even in our aloneness - we are in good company. As I was reading this morning, I found myself in John 16. In the last few verses, Jesus tells His disciples ...

Life can change on a dime. I have no idea where that expression comes from, but I know it's true. This weekend I was made aware of some major changes coming my way. It's just life, right? I found out a long time ago as I'm sure you did too, life doesn't stop for caregivers. We just have to keep on caregiving and take on anything else life throws our way. Seems like there oughta be a "hold" button somewhere. I don't need it for long typically, but just a give me a second to catch my breath button would be nice. So my heart and mind were full as I got up and started getting around. I usually get Chris' bolus together, start my coffee and then while it is making I take care of him. My mind was going through all the things I need to handle today, my work schedule and many other things. As usual, my thoughts became my prayers as I mentally walked through my responsibilities. I sighed. Then I made a choice. I decided to be content with life right where...

We have a humbling job in caregiving. We don't often talk about some of the baser things we have to deal with. It's obviously not acceptable on a social level, and seriously, how would those sorts of things work into a conversation? lol When most people see us, we're all cleaned up, dressed up and presentable. There are very few people who see us up walking the floor at night, carrying out the odorous trash bags, ordering incontinence supplies and all the little nitty-gritty things that go into just one of our days. I've yet to have anyone take me up on walking through a day with me from start to finish. Finish? What's that?  We truly want to protect the dignity of our loved ones, so there are some things, they  may never know. It can be very humbling to take care of a whole person. It's also an honor, but when I am taking care of some of the more personal stuff, my thoughts can go crazy. Here I am doing this, and I thought I was called to the mission field....

Chris and I made the trip up to Guthrie this week to see my mom again. One of my sisters was there and so was daddy for a little bit. My mom is losing it a little more all the time, but she seems pleasant. She also still remembers all of us. My sister showed her a picture one of our longtime family friends posted on Facebook this week. It is of many of the old-timers who were the prayer warriors at the church we grew up in. Mama named everyone one of them! It's funny what she remembers and what she doesn't. It's like her head is running around in all her old memories and randomly pulling them out one by one. I'm thankful she has good memories for her head to get lost in. I don't think this trip was as emotional for me, so maybe I'm adjusting. It does help to see her happy. Who'd have thought she would love bingo though? As I was driving home, I was thinking about these ladies who led the way for us. They taught my mama how to pray and she taught me. ...

I am resolved that there are just some things I will never understand. The last three weeks have been very rough. Two friends have died and gone on to their eternal reward, my son's botched surgery, near death and hospital stay and Thanksgiving without family have all taken a toll on my emotions. Last night I was reading a post by someone whose son suffered a brain injury just a few weeks ago and he's making a remarkable recovery. I'm very happy for the family. But I have all these whys ? Why does one recover and get to go on with life and another doesn't? this just added to my frustrations and perplexities. I saw phrases that kind of made me mad. People say God is good.   And then they say God was with him.  Those phrases we tend to only use when things go our way or when we get what we wanted. Are they saying God wasn't with my son? I know they don't mean it - but since I didn't get the same wonderful results is God not  good? Was he not  with Chris ...

It seemed as though Philippians 2 was written just for me this morning even though Paul penned it years ago to Christians in very different circumstances. I found a few nuggets to think about today, and a couple of them stung just a bit. I ended up thinking about verse 1 a lot more than the others because these can be very real questions for the caregiver. The NLT reads Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? any fellowship together in the Spirit?  And Paul goes on to talk to the believers at Philippi asking them why they are not getting along. While my focus isn't on getting along with other believers, I did think about these questions as a caregiver. Obviously, believing in Him hasn't kept difficult times from visiting. Knowing Him didn't "protect" us from being caregivers, and it didn't keep us from having to face some very difficult situations in life. Just think about Job - his faith didn't protect him fro...

Colossians 4:2 says to devote yourself to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart.  (NLT) It can be far too easy to allow the responsibilities and daily grind of caregiving to lull us into a spiritual sleep. Taking care of another person takes a lot out of us emotionally, physically and even spiritually. Over time we can tend to relax spiritually if we do not guard our hearts. Personally, I am a very structured person. I set my schedule and just keep it. Well, that's how it was BC (before caregiving) anyway. I got up early enough when I was teaching school to have my coffee, Bible study and prayer time long before the day got out of hand. When I first brought my son home, I tried to do that again. Honestly, I was worn out all the time and soon it went out the window. Recently, I've been able to come back to some type of schedule but of course remain flexible for caregiving's sake. It's so important to keep our spiritual guard up. We have to maintain our spi...

Did you ever feel like God isn't doing anything? Sometimes when we pray we don't see any immediate actions and it is easy to think that God isn't doing anything on our behalf. Over the last few caregiving years many times my thoughts have turned into prayers. All day I am pouring out my heart before the Lord. I'm not asking to be rescued anymore; and I'm not necessarily looking for Him to ride in on a white horse and save me. But I typically am asking for wisdom to handle the various situations caregivers must face. Sometimes I'm asking for help, strength or peace. It seems like this is what Asaph was doing as he penned Psalm 77. He was at his wit's end, a place the caregiver lives. We mean something entirely different from the rest of the world when we say we are livin' on the edge!  Even on a good day it only takes one phone call, one mishap or one small change to topple our worlds. In this psalm, Asaph pours it all out before the Lord. Asaph went so...

When Jesus came to Gethsemane, His first response was to pray. Then in Mark 14:33 these words stuck out to me this morning: and He began to be very distressed and troubled.  How could that be? Jesus told the disciples repeatedly to not  be troubled, yet we read here that He is in deep distress. Did He contradict Himself? Of course not! He told the disciples that were with Him that He was deeply grieved to the point of death . And then He began to pray. There are a couple more things that stick out to me here. One thing is that He told those close to Him how He felt.  As caregivers, we do not tend to do that very much. For the most part, we are the ones carrying the load and in many cases we are walking it alone. Sometimes there may not be anyone close enough to tell that you're having a difficult time, are depressed or overburdened. Other times, we just cannot admit our weakness as we don't want others to think we cannot carry the load - we have to be strong for those w...

It is certainly that time of year that most of us like to take some time for reflective thinking and thanksgiving. It's a very good thing, of course. I have found myself lately trying to turn my heart more to one of thanksgiving when I seem overwhelmed. It does not matter how "good" of a situation we are in as caregivers, depression and sadness can just slip up on you.  For me, I see my son how he is and miss who he was. My emotions can slip away in a heartbeat. Just like the our lives can slip away and change forever with one phone call.Well, lately when I look at my son and see him so immobile I turn my heart to thanksgiving. I make myself be thankful for anything I can think of!  Philippians 4:6-7 says this: Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will keep your heats and your minds in Christ Jesus. I know we are talking abo...

While I was studying this morning my Bible kind of fell open to Daniel. I didn't really read but a verse or two, but I just started thinking about this man. He is one of my favorite Bible characters and I know I mention him a lot. But I just cannot imagine enduring the things Daniel had to face in his lifetime.  He was pretty young when they went into captivity at which time he was castrated and was basically made a slave. He was trained for service to the king, but he lost his life, dreams and hopes in the process. He would never do the normal things like get married, buy land and have children. It had all been stolen from him.  Yet even when Daniel faced such great adversity, he continued to pray daily. It was not just a fluke, he was not trying to use prayer to make anything better or even to get out of captivity at this point. It seems his prayers and efforts did not turn that direction until he found where God has specifically told Jeremiah that it would be 70 years ...

It's funny how people who honestly don't know can think that because we are home all day things don't get busy or hectic for the caregiver! It's like they expect that since we are home all day we don't have a thing to do! lol! Ever heard that one?  The truth is that it can go from slow to hectic in the matter of a couple of seconds! (..or less! lol!) Let one little thing on our daily schedule get out of sync and BAM! It's like the familiar picture of the dominoes once the chain reaction starts... and it only escalates from there...or is that a limited thing - does it only happen to me?  Sometimes what makes my day so hectic is actually a blessing. That's when it's important to take time to be thankful for the blessing and not let the hectic scene have our attention...instead of complaining to God about all the things I need to get done before going to bed at night - I'm learning to stop and change my perspective into a thankfulness for the bless...