Process Process Process!

Do you ever feel cheated out of life? For me caregiving interrupted some really good plans that I had laid out. I was heading to Africa as fast as I could get there- one of my life-long dreams. But when my son had his wreck that and my future were jerked right out from under me. I have to admit that I've dealt with some anger over that. Caregiving makes it hard to dream.

I'm aging along with the rest of you, and these are supposed to be the years I've looked forward to. It's time for me to start planning retirement. Of course, I wanted to relax, travel, spend the golden years fulfilling all the dreams I still had. Instead I'm trying to figure out how to put back and prepare for taking care of my son once I am gone. No retirement in sight - ever.

Anger is just one of the things Paul instructed Christians to put off in Colossians 3. Actually, he gave a whole list of things to put away from us.In verse 8 he lists things like anger,rage, malicious behavior, slander and unholy language. These are all to be gotten rid of - and this takes action on our part. They are not evidently just going to fall off as we travel along the roads of life. Actually, it can be a constant struggle to beat their influence in our lives. Caregiving can be frustrating. Not really so much the taking care of our loved one - but dealing with all the other particulars and organizations that are supposed to be in place to provide help for us.

While we are taking off all these ungodly actions we are supposed to be putting on other things. In verse 12 Paul tells us to put on or to clothe ourselves (once again an action on our part) with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Evidently Paul never had to deal with DHS or a home health agency. lol

In reality, it can be difficult to get rid of anger and embrace humility and grace. Actually, because of our lives this can be a constant struggle for us. And it simply doesn't happen over night. It takes effort and time to develop. Actually in verse 10, Paul says that our new self is being renewed as we learn about Him and become like Him. This verb is not past tense as if it's all a done deal. Instead it is present continuous. This means it is not only happening right now - it is continuing to happen in the future. It's not a one time deal. There's no "easy button" to push either. We'll have to walk it out right in the face of adversity.

We choose to allow His work in our hearts. We allow His peace to displace the anger or turmoil. (or whatever it is you deal with specifically.) It's certainly not going to go away on its own. It's a process - and we have to yield to that process.

Today I will consciously yield to the process He is doing in my heart. I will make every effort to put off anger instead of embracing it. My meditation will be on His peace and I will choose to embrace His work in my heart. I'll purposefully choose to lay aside anger and choose to follow peace. Will you join me?

Caregiver Burnout is Real

Do you ever just get too tired? Do you ever want to quit? Do you ever sit down for a whole 30 seconds and think about not getting back up? Ever? Who am I kidding? Sometimes I forget who I'm talking to. Lol. As caregivers, burnout is real. But the problem for most of us, is we don't get a break even in the midst of burnout, right? Let's face it. If we had a bit more help we might avoid burnout - but once we feel that we are in a season of burnout and stressed out - there's still no help. It's easy to feel stuck. I try to do a few things to avoid burnout and to cope. Someone told me one time that I had learned how to live even in the midst of the situation. I think she was right. I have learned to slow down and enjoy an afternoon cup of tea (or coffee!!!). I try to get outside as much as possible because sunshine and fresh air are essential to a healthy life. Some days that means sitting on the patio so I can see Chris in the recliner through the window. But I'

Part of the Crowd

I took Chris to our local minor league baseball team's game yesterday. I must say I give the ballpark an A+ on accessibility. The parking guys pointed me to a handicap spot right near the gate. And from there, I just rolled him in and found our accessible seating - which just means a chair beside an empty spot for the wheelchair to fit in! It was great. He could see fine and even though it was a bit loud at times - it wasn't too loud for him. What joy fills my heart when I find things to do that are positive. As we sat and watched the game, we became part of the crowd. We were all watching the game and cheering on the home team. We had one purpose - besides being entertained, and that was to support the local team. We all cheered when our guys made a play. We hooped and hollered when one of them stole a base or hit a home run. It was so amazing to be part of something bigger than us - to be part of the community. It made me think about the crowds who followed Jesus and the w

Ups and Downs

Maybe it's just "that time of year" for me, but I've struggled a lot the last few weeks. I still affectionately call it the caregiver's fog. Lol. Okay, maybe it's not-so-affectionately. I know I can share my true feelings with you guys because you get it. You understand the day-to-day grind of caregiving. The military has a saying about there being no easy day. I think we live in that reality. It's just not easy caring for another whole person, is it? Caregiving presents many difficulties. We can find ourselves alone, so very alone on this journey. It doesn't just go away. We don't just work through it. It seems to go on and on. There are lots of ups and downs - and that can be about every 90 seconds some days. Right? (smile!) As I've been working through this emotional maze the last few days, I turned my thoughts to Daniel. Let's take a realistic look at his circumstances because as we read his story in the Bible, we tend to glamorize i

Daily Devotions for Caregivers

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