Showing posts with label struggles. Show all posts
Showing posts with label struggles. Show all posts

Completely Complete

 

Chris and I at the Bluff Park Trails

Last night I started a Zoom Bible study. We are studying the book of James. As I was preparing to teach the lesson, I got stuck in verse 4 of the first chapter. Remember that James is writing to the persecuted church, the Jewish Christians in particular. He was encouraging them in the middle of their tribulation. He encouraged them to find joy and be patient. That doesn't seem fair, does it? lol - As caregivers, we have a lot to do and I did not put those two items on my to-do list for today. My list looks more like survive and don't throat punch anyone. lol

I thought about that for quite some time. The audacity to write to people under extreme stress and tell them to be patient and joyous. (lol) Then, James says to let patience have its perfect work so that you can be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. (NKJ) Here's what really stood out to me. James was in essence explaining that God was still working in and for them, even in the midst of horrible persecution. He told them they could be 

  • Perfect (mature)
  • Complete (whole)
  • Lacking Nothing...
Even in the middle of their struggles. I began to think about this scripture as if James had written the letter to caregivers. It would read the same, right? Let patience have its perfect work so that you, caregivers can be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. I almost cried thinking about the promise of wholeness, completeness, and no lack we are NOT denied as caregivers. Even though we live in some tough circumstances - God still completes us. He still fills us. He is still our shepherd so we lack nothing - have no want. 

Our struggles, circumstances, difficulties, or surroundings do not and cannot deny us access to the God of the earth! Every promise in His word is still ours! He doesn't deny us even one thing because we are caregivers, we still get the whole package of grace, peace, salvation, and everything else. We are complete even in our broken circumstances. 

Today, I will turn my thoughts toward this completeness and wholeness we have in Him - even in our circumstances. My meditations will be on how He continues to pour His peace and presence out for us and on us so that we lack literally nothing. No good thing does He withhold from those who love Him - He never excludes us from good gifts because life is tough. He draws near to the brokenhearted. I'll meditate on all the things He gives rather than what life feels like it's lacking. I will trust Him with today - and rest in this God who completes us - will you join me?


Where’d You Leave It?


me and my mama
Yesterday as I was driving up to see my mom in the nursing home, I spent some time praying. It was one of those times where I felt like I just upended my heart and dumped it all out at the foot of His throne. I handed Him all my pain and confusion, some with words – some without. As I was pouring my heart out before Him I began to get some answers. They just started popping up in my mind.

As I drove, I asked for wisdom. Then I asked for peace. When I asked for peace, I had this question come up in my head. Where’d you put it? It struck me a bit funny, but I let my heart and mind pursue it. Where’d I put what?  Peace. That’s what I was praying for, right?

Then the scripture came to mind – in John 14:27, Jesus told His disciples, Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. In that moment, it seemed as though He was asking me a question. And of course, we know God doesn’t ask questions just for the sake of gathering information – He already knows!

It was more like he was asking me where did YOU put the peace I left for you?   I thought about that for quite some time. Jesus was preparing Himself for the crucifixion – He didn’t need peace on the other side of the cross. He is peace. He said He was leaving it for His disciples who were also instructed to not let their hearts be troubled. Well that’s easier said than done, especially for caregivers who have circumstances from all sides chipping away at their hearts, minds, and peace – day in and day out!

But somehow – just His question brought peace to my troubled soul. As I got lost in thought, peace began to flood my soul. I realized He left it here – His peace that is. He left it for us. What are we going to do with it? Where are we going to put it? Will we lay it aside and just go on walking in our confusion and fears? Or will we let ourselves be clothed and covered with His peace? Colossians 3:15 says to let the peace of God rule in your hearts… It’s an exercise in trust I presume! But it’s definitely a purposeful action.

Today, I will focus on letting His peace reign in my heart. I’ll be intent about leaning in to hear Him and drowning out the noise of the caregiving world with His voice. To “let” means to allow – I’ll allow His peace to reign in my heart – and in my mind today. In that way – I’ll trust Him with just this day and all that it may bring my way. Will you join me?

Lion Hearts

Sorry to be MIA of late - I had my plate full last week as my mom was staying with me for a few days. She has some sort of dementia and requires lots of TLC right now so it was my pleasure to have her stay with me. However, it meant that my plate, which was already full, was piled just a little fuller. So I did what I could to keep my head above water.....so I went missing.

Over the last few weeks, my mind and heart have been busy processing stuff. Life, really. And as usual, there are tons of things going through my head and heart all at the same time. When I wake up in the morning it seems like my head is already going a hundred miles an hour, and maybe more! I have no idea what the series of thoughts were that brought me to the passage in Daniel, but I'm sure it was a logical sequence.

I opened my Bible to Daniel 3, verse 17. This is where Daniel's three friends were facing the fiery furnace. It's their statement - their dedication to the fire that piqued my interest this morning. They said  our God is able to deliver us from the blazing fire; and He will deliver us out of your hand, O king. But even if He does not, be it known to you O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image you have set up.

My thoughts were mostly wrapping around their tenacity and dedication to the fire. They were not looking for a way out - but were tenaciously saying they would gladly walk through the fire rather than give up to other gods.

I kind of see caregivers that way. There's this dedication to the journey, you know? We are going to continue to walk in the fire not expecting God to deliver us out. If He does - great. But if not - we will not bow or give in to the pressure. We will still serve Him. Isn't that partly why you are here right now reading this blog?

Many days we are strong and our faith seems to carry us through. Other days we are looking for a thread of hope and wondering if we have the strength to hold on. But when we feel life push us to give in - something stands up inside of us and boldly proclaims: I'm not bowing to the pressure. I'll walk through this fire - but not give up on God.

Same tenacity. Same dedication. Same boldness and power that we have admired in Daniel's friends, isn't it? I know we don't like seeing ourselves that way. For the most part, we are like - hey, I do what I gotta do to make it. And that is true - but inside there's this lion that is seeking God's heart. And we are not giving up - even in our fiery circumstance - until we find Him.

And where exactly do we find Him? Right there in the furnace with us. Yup - He's walking through the fiery trials alongside each of us. Isaiah 43:1-2 says this:

But now, thus says the Lord Your creator, O Jacob,
and He who formed you O Israel,
Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are Mine!
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
nor will the flame burn you. 
For I am the Lord your God 
The Holy One of Israel....

Sometimes I'm sad because He didn't promise us a ticket out. He said we'd pass through waters, rivers and fire. We are not exempt. However, He also said He'd be with us in them. And that's what I am holding on to today.

Today I'm going to rejoice that He didn't leave me to face the fire alone. I choose to be thankful He is in the floods with me. My mind will be on the truth that He's a furnace walker too - because He's in there with us. My meditations will be on His choice to never leave us - and to carry us when necessary. Just like I choose to walk with Him - He chooses to walk with me. I like that and it will be my meditation today as I trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?

Help Us Remember

This morning I skimmed through the story of Joshua and the Children of Israel. I wanted to refresh my mind on how God provided for them throughout their years of traveling in the wilderness.

As I was glancing through chapter after chapter I realized how much they had to fight to get where God promised them they could be. I'm thinking it would have been a lot easier for them and God had He just picked them up and put them where He wanted them. But would they have grown?

I read over how they faced struggle after struggle in many different ways. They marched around Jericho and saw it's walls crumble right before their eyes. The crossed the Jordan river, which sounds simple - but it's not. Because of Achan's sin they were defeated at Ai; but eventually came back and won the territory.The sun stood still as they fought at Gilgal. And the list goes on until they reached the promised land, divided it up and began to settle in.

The Children of Israel faced so many ups and downs, struggles and victories over their journey. But God provided everything they needed along the way. Recently, I did some reflection on how He has provided for my son and I on our long journey too.

We can look at the history of the Israelites and see how God took care of them. He rained manna and quail down from heaven, provided fresh water from a rock, carried them across two seas, and put up with all their whining and moaning and groaning all along the way.

The more I think about it, it seems to parallel my life as a caregiver - at least the whining part! lol.

Where my thoughts settled after refreshing my memory on all this was in Joshua chapter 22. Yes, they had been complaining over the years, yes they had made mistakes. The earth literally ate the sons of Korah, Achan sinned at Ai, they created and worshiped a golden calf - idolatry and unfaithfulness was rampant all the way through. Yet here in chapter 22 of Joshua we find one of my favorite (yet little known) characters in the Bible, Phinehas.

Reuben's bunch built an altar and the priests questioned if it was acceptable or not. It wasn't protocol. Phinehas led the charge against Reuben's crew. How dare you build an altar to another god! Phinehas charged. But Reuben explained that they built it to remember what God had done for them. And so that when future generations asked about it they could be told of how God provided and cared for them over the long journey.

The two things that stand out to me are these. One, Phinehas' passionate protection of worship. He was adamant that they were not going to worship anyone but God. Secondly, Reuben's worship of God. He set up the altar so they could remember all God had done - not so they would remember all the bad stuff.

The caregiving journey is not an easy one. There are battles and struggles all the way and on many fronts. We face giants and Jerichos pretty much every day. Our own thoughts can attack us until it can be hard to stay the course. I want to be like Phinehas in the sense that I protect my heart from setting up an altar to anything other than God. And I want to be like Reuben who only remembers the struggles as a way to focus on all God has done.

In the most difficult circumstances, God has provided quite literally more than I could have ever imagined. I will be the first to say it's a difficult way to walk - but I'll also be the first to shout how God has taken down the giants that were in the way. And I have to admit, I've been a lot like the children of Israel, fussing and crying and moaning and complaining all the way out. But God has been faithful and I want to remember like Reuben all His works and how He's brought us to a good place in Him even though it took many battles to get there.

Today, I will meditate on all the works of God I've seen as on the caregiving walk. My focus will be on His faithfulness, His patience, His provision and His focus on caring for me. As I reflect on this journey and His faithfulness, I will express my gratitude to Him for all He has done. I'll smile. And I'll rest in Him knowing He's got me for one more day. Will you join me?

The In-Betweens

This morning during my quiet time I was thinking about some of my favorite Bible characters and the obstacles they overcame. Of course, it's the fact that they overcame that makes them heroes of our faith. I was trying to think if I could find some distant way to identify with any one of them. But I'm not sure anyone was a caregiver or could relate to our world today in that way. David took care of Jonathan's son Mephibosheth who was crippled, but other than that I pretty much came up empty.

But as my mind was strolling through some of the great OT stories, it landed on Moses; and that's where I settled. We know at God's word he charged in and faced an obstinate king only to find out that God's chosen people were just as obstinate. Moses really had his hands full trying to provide for a nation of people. There was a lot happening between Exodus chapter 3 and chapter 19.

In chapter 3, Moses is standing on the mount and God tells him that he'd return to that spot to worship Him. And just as God promised, in chapter 19 - Moses has returned with the nation of Israel with him. how amazing is that? But -- it's the in between that Moses had to endure that I want to focus on.

Before Moses gets back to that worship site, he faced Pharaoh and went through the 10 plagues. THEN once they got out of Egypt, they ran smack dab into the Red Sea. For me - I'd have fallen apart right there and thought I must have missed God. But not Moses - he asked God what to do (that's a novel idea) and then they went across on dry land and Pharaoh's army was drowned. That's when the celebration started and in chapter 15 we get a glimpse of their song of victory as their enemies were washed away.

But it's  not over yet.

Just a short trek from the Red Sea - they run out of water! The water they found was bitter - I can relate to that as sometimes everything (even good things) can have a bitter taste. God provides fresh water and then what? The natives are restless and start fussing about their food source. No problem though, right? God rains down manna on them every day for them to eat. But that's not good enough for these grumpy people - they want meat. And Moses gets an ear full again! No problem - God drives quail by the dozens into the camp so they can satisfy their longing for meat.

Everything is nice and comfy in the wilderness now and they enjoy a beautiful Sabbath celebration. Until.....they ran out of water again in chapter 17. Moses prayed once again and God provided.Then in chapter 18 we see how Moses is burdened by trying to keep peace in the camp. He was working daylight to dark quite literally trying to solve problems. I'm pretty sure this was not a peaceful trip for this fearless leader.

But finally in chapter 19 Moses gets to stand on the mountain once again and rejoice in God's promises. It seems it wasn't the promises that Moses had to worry about - but the in-between that gave him fits.

As caregivers just one day can feel like this kind of emotional roller coaster ride - and sometimes it's hour by hour. We are up and in have it all together mode and some little something sends us down the deep dark tunnel of depression. It's okay - we'll be back up in a few minutes only to plummet down again... it can be a vicious cycle. The mountain tops are great - but there can be a lot in between.

It's those struggles in between where our faith is tested, refined and defined. In those times the glory of the mountain top can fade. We just have to remember that it will return. Sometimes it's as easy as finding a quiet place and choosing to worship - other times life chips away at every bit of sanity we have left. During those times - we learn to wait on Him. And that's actually powerful stuff. It's the waiting during the in-betweens that builds our strength, tests our courage (and patience I might add). Faith is fertilized in the field of waiting....and materializes on the mountain top as we commune with Him in worship.

We cannot do away with either - the mountain or the wilderness. They both play a role in defining our relationship with God and strengthening it too.

Today, I want to think about how both the mountain and the wilderness can yield way to worship. I'll meditate on how God does not change during the in-betweens. He remains faithful and constant no matter if we are looking to Him to provide our basic daily needs or worshiping Him on the mountain tops of life. And while I wait for Him - I'll praise and thank Him for always being with me - in all the in-between spots of life. And I'll rest in that thought. Will you join me?












Less than Perfect

Have you ever had someone tell you that because your loved one wasn't healed you lacked faith? Sadly enough, I have. Yet if we look at all our Bible heroes we'll see that we admire them because of the trials they endured. Each of them give us a picture of how to trust God in adversity; and how to keep faith during intense testing and trials. Adversity is actually the true test of faith. It's in the midst of the trial that we find out just how much we trust God. Can we trust Him when our lives are less than perfect?

The caregiver's life is definitely "less than perfect" if we compare it to others. For some of it caregiving can mean that we are locked up in our own little cave unable to get out and about. For others, there may be some getting out - but there's not quite the freedom we see in the rest of the world. Caregiving can complicate everything on a variety of levels. We can't use the struggles of caregiving to measure our lives. We also cannot use the pleasures of caregiving as an accurate measure of life or faith.

This morning I was thinking about Moses and how he followed the Lord's leading to bring the Children of Israel out of Egypt's bondage. He led the "great escape" and they were free from Pharaoh's grip. But their rejoicing was short lived because they ran smooth into the Red Sea; and Pharaoh's army was closing in behind them.

Just because Moses ran into the Red Sea doesn't mean they were going the wrong direction.

The Red Sea was not a sign that Moses had done anything wrong or made a wrong turn along the way. It simply became an opportunity to trust God more. Moses and the Children of Israel were in a position for God to show Himself strong on their behalf. Caregiving can be a struggle; but it is not a sign of faithlessness or weakness; just an opportunity to trust Him more. It gives us the opportunity to see Him work directly in our lives.

When my son was first injured I thought for sure I'd done something wrong to end up in the situation. But we cannot use struggles and trials to measure ourselves or our lives. Every Bible hero faced something. It shaped them into the hero of faith we admire and enjoy studying today. When we face a Red Sea or an impasse in our lives it's not time to condemn ourselves and wonder what we did wrong; it's just a time to learn to trust Him more.

Today I will meditate on His sustaining mercy. I will think about how He doesn't abandon me when I face a "Red Sea" in my life; but He instructs me and goes with me through the struggles. Today I will thank Him for His wisdom, peace, direction and ever-abiding presence even in the trials. Will you join me?

Fully Armed

When we wake up in the morning we never know what a day is going to bring. Each day is filled with much uncertainty. Some days it feels like everything is a fight. You know? Trying to get aides who come on time - or show up period, dealing with government agencies and various types of health care providers can be draining. And of course all of that is on top of the difficulty of taking care of another.

Do you ever just get tired of fighting? I know I do. It can feel like we are struggling uphill simply trying to get others to do their jobs so we can do ours. Sorry I do not have a check list of how to make those sorts of things go smoother or faster! (Don't you know I wish I did!!?) But here's what I am thinking today.

If you get tired of fighting and struggling; just stand. In Ephesians 6 the apostle Paul told the church to stand. He did not tell them to progress, to struggle, to fight or to do anything else at all. He just said when you have done all , stand firm. (Eph 6:13b) Now tell me something - if you see someone standing fully armed having on all their fighting gear and armor - does it make sense to attack them? No way! When we are standing in God's armor (which is much stronger than our own...) we are fully armed for any attack or scheme the enemy of our souls might bring our way.

Today - meditate on standing in His full armor. Don't even think about fighting.. just think about standing there with the confidence that He has provided. You know we cannot lose this in the end, right? Today - Just stand!

The Biggest Attack

There can be lots of things that nag at your mind and emotions throughout the day. It would be difficult to try to discuss them because our situations are so vastly different. Each set of circumstances that got us into the caregiver's role is unique...but there is one battle we fight that is most likely very much the same for all of us. That is the fight of faith.

It may be very unique to me so forgive me please! But it seems this is one area that the enemy really likes to stir up a lot of the time. He would so like for us to think that we do not have faith or else we would not be in these circumstances. If we had faith then our loved one would not be sick or maimed. But this is simply not true.

1 Peter 5:8-10 talks about resisting the devil in his attacks. It says for us to be sober and also to be alert. We cannot let our circumstances lull us to sleep. We must pick up that Bible and read, talk to God, and stay very diligent in our walk of faith, especially from where we are. Remember that Western religion has warped our thoughts about faith and how it works. But in its most simple form faith is continuing to stand.

 Verse 10 in this passage means a lot to me today as I struggle in my own faith. We must remember that He will perfect us, confirm us, strengthen us and establish us! We just have to fight for our faith to stay intact! Today - give yourself some credit for continuing to stand - for continuing to seek...you are much stronger than you think! You are full of faith!! Quiet your mind when it fights against you and just allow Him to strengthen you and establish you as you grow in faith.

How Good Can You Throw?

Do you remember the various games we used to play as a child that required we throw a ball? I can remember throwing a ball over the house with someone else. It was fun because you never knew exactly when it was coming back over or where it would come from or where it would land! I always prided myself on how easily I could throw the ball over the house. And I had a pretty accurate eye and arm when it came to throwing baseballs or footballs too! But when it comes to throwing my cares on Him it seems like I lost my touch!

 1 Peter 5:7 says that we should be casting all  your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. This casting is not a passively handing or gently tossing action. It is forcefully throwing all the anxiety of my day, week, or life on Him. Why? Because He is going to do all  the caring for me! I can roll it all over onto Him and let Him do my worrying. Now of course it is only worrying when we are carrying our own load and trying to find our own way in the midst of the struggle. For God, it's not worry at all. He is literally caring  for us.

 I hope you can see this picture. It's not just that He cares for us in the sense that He has great concern over the matters that are concerning us. Of course He loves us, tends to us and carries us...but in this sense, when we can roll all of the things that concern us, all of the things that cause us anxiety over onto Him - then He will do the caring... so we won't have to!

 Make today a day when you hand it all over to Him and you do not worry about stuff at all! It's like having a day off emotionally. Let Him do the caring for you today! I think I will try it again tomorrow too!

Stir it Up!

One of the most discussed topics at online caregiver support groups is the loneliness. It seems to be a common thread that runs through the very core of the pain and heaviness that comes with the territory. And for many it comes because of the lack of ability to get out. For some it's possible to get out on occasion, but so difficult and challenging it's just not practical. So there is not too much contact with the outside world...and that means no church attendance either. This can be draining for the caregiver.

That means that Bible study, devotions and fellowship with God is even more necessary. Sure, there may not be a "Christian support group" (which can be the role the church plays for many) to encourage us in our walk, and even though it's not necessary for our spiritual growth, it would be nice! But once again it's left solely in our hands to stir ourselves up to seek the Lord. Honestly, it's an individual thing for everyone, not just the caregiver.

This scripture in Isaiah 64:7 about stirring oneself up is in the middle of a cry for help from the prophet Isaiah. He's really asking God to tear the heavens apart and come to His people, come rescue them and let His presence be known. Verse 4 says this from days of old they have not heard or perceived by ear, nor has the eye seen a God besides You, who acts in behalf of the one who waits for Him. He goes on to talk about how God meets those who wait for Him and then he comes to verse 7 - where he says he hasn't seen anyone who would arouse himself to take hold of God.

There are two key things for our meditation today. One, that God acts on behalf of those who wait for Him; and two we can stir ourselves up to take hold of Him. There are no stipulations to these two actions - no unless you are in a difficult situation, and no but if's either. It's plain and simple, it's in our power even in our pain to take hold of Him and walk with Him.And as we wait for Him , He will show Himself strong on our behalf. Take time today to take hold of Him.

Faith is the Substance

Hebrews 11:1 has long been misunderstood, or at least our overall concept of faith has been at best misinterpreted. The faith-ers would like for us to believe that "faith" is this force field that surrounds us and keeps bad things from happening. But there are too many examples throughout scriptures of those who went through the fires of life with their faith in tact. Actually Peter said that the trial of our faith is more precious than purified gold.

While taking a serious look at the heroes of faith, even just the ones listed in Hebrews 11, we can see that it was their faith in God that carried them through. Without the struggles - we could have skipped this chapter altogether!

We've seen church faith to be two things. One that faith is the force field to keep bad things away; and two faith is the substance has been interpreted to bring substance. However, Hebrews 11:1 states that faith is the substance. It's the substance that keeps us running back to His heart no matter what (good or bad) is going on in our lives. Faith is more like a force inside of us that carries us back to Him every moment of every day. It's that part of us that refuses to give up in the face of adversity! We cannot accept the church's weakened version that basically says we use faith to bring us stuff. That will not sustain us through tough times..stuff is not the measure of whether or not we are operating in faith.

Faith says there is a God...and I will serve Him in the good times and the bad. Job said he would accept good and adversity from God. That's faith - circumstances do not dethrone God - faith means He has constant reign in our hearts...no matter what. Faith is substance.

Facing Goliath

As a caregiver even small things can seem huge becasuse of the strain we are under. The tiniest thing (even if we know it is tiny) can set us off into lala land with our emotions. And the bigger things - there's no description for those emotions...and many times no words.

Today I encouraged myself with the story of David. He faced Goliath. He had never faced a giant before. Actually, there's no indication that he faced any person before that day - not in the heat of battle. He wasn't old enough to be a soldier. But he had faced similar odds.

He had faced a lion and a bear. They had come to steal the sheep he was keeping and he didn't have anything but the strength of his hands and the help of God! And he tore them apart!

My meditations are on things today that I may or may not have any control over. Situations come up that perhaps I have not been through. But because of what I have seen God carry me through in the past I can stand in His strength and face them.

David had this mentality. God had given him the strength to take out the bear and the lion and he had no doubt He would take the giant down as well. So I don't kow what your today looks like - but remind yourself of the things you've seen God bring you through in the past. It will help to bring some light to today - and the future as well - becasue we know that He will never leave us or forsake us!

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...