Showing posts with label daily life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label daily life. Show all posts

Permission to Believe

 


I found myself in a very familiar story this morning as I was preparing for live devotions on Facebook. It's in Matthew 14:22-33. We know this story as the time Jesus came walking on the water. It's also familiar because Peter jumped out of the boat and walked on the water to get to Jesus. Have you ever been in a place where it felt like it would take a miracle for you to get to God? 

There were several things that stood out in this story. I hope you take a minute to read it again today. I like that Jesus took time for solitude and prayer. What an example for us. If He needed it - we certainly do! 

I like that Jesus stepped out into the storm to get to his weary, frightened disciples who were still trying to row the boat. (That's us - huh?) They were frightened at first. But then they recognized Him. He told them to not be afraid. They knew His voice because He simply said, I am here. (NLT)

Then Peter who is known to be a bit impulsive calls out. He said, If it's really You - tell me to come to You by walking on the water. (NLT) Now I've read this story numerous times as many of us have. But this morning I stopped to think about Peter's inquiry. Why didn't he just jump out of the boat and take off? His question seems to indicate to me that he really wanted to. What held him back?

If it's really You - Peter said. Did he doubt? If he doubted why in the world would he have trusted this voice in the night? What if it wasn't Jesus? A deceiver or imposter could bid him to jump out of the boat to his doom. Right? 

Maybe Peter knew Jesus' voice but was just enough afraid to stay in the boat. Maybe Peter just needed permission to believe. And Jesus said, Alright, come. (NLT) 

As caregivers, our days and nights can get rocky. We can be tossed around on life's sea like a boat in a storm. But we keep rowing just like the disciples did. It doesn't say they were waiting for or expecting Jesus to come to them. But He came. He walked right into the middle of their dark night; right into the middle of their storm and gave them permission to believe Him. I like that.

Today, I will take a good look at my own faith. I'll ask myself some hard questions too. Do I believe? Would I jump out of the boat and run to Him? Will I accept Him in the middle of the dark night of the soul? Will I trust Him to calm the storm? Yes. Yes. Yes. and Yes. Will you join me today?

Juggling Acts


The last weekend in February has been a fun one for the last seven years. It’s usually the weekend of my daughter’s birthday but sometimes falls the weekend after her actual birthday. We have ridden the train to Fort Worth and participated in some way in the Cowtown races. This year, we did the 10K together on Saturday. The rest of the weekend is ours to enjoy. This year, we just relaxed other than the expo for the event and the 10K we finished early on Saturday.

Giving her this one weekend a month where it’s just mother-daughter, is not really enough to make up for giving all my time to her brother, Chris, whom I care for 24/7. It doesn’t really give her back the time she’s lost these last 11 years. But it’s a special time for her and for me – we spend it together just being us. It’s always loads of fun and she calls all the shots as to where we eat and what we do. This year, planning did not go off without a hitch.

We get some respite through the Advantage program (if you are a caregiver check it out in your state it helps with a lot of things). It wasn’t approved two days before we were to board the train, so I was jumping through mental hoops looking for alternative care for him on Friday. Of course, at the last minute, the approval came through. I don’t understand why something requested weeks ago take to the last minute. It’s like they really don’t care about our feelings – we are just a number on a piece of paper.

Then, my friend who was going to pick Chris up on Friday night fell very ill. Before we board the train I’m trying to jump through hoops to get someone else to take him home and stay with him the first night. It’s all quite funny now – but it wasn’t then.

As caregivers, if we even get a break, it can feel like we are being punished for wanting one. It takes more work to organize all the particulars than it does to just stay home and take care of him. Or at least it feels like it. Overall, it all went well, and he was definitely well cared for and he did very well this time with eating and things like that. Plus, my daughter and I had our special time together and we both got some much-needed downtime. Overall, I’d have to say it was a juggling success. Lol.

Sometimes I wonder if God is looking down on my juggling act and shaking His head. Maybe He is burying His face in His hands. But juggling isn’t a one time a year thing for us caregivers. Many don’t even get that opportunity. Day after day we juggle caregiving tasks, cooking, work, other children’s needs, and our own needs are the pin that gets dropped while we try to keep everything else in the juggle. I know He sees each of us and He understands, even when He seems silent.

I’ve said many times, that God doesn’t make a convenient exit just because life gets ugly. He never stops painting because the picture isn’t pretty. He doesn’t stop listening when life’s song sounds out of key. 1 Timothy 2: 19 reminds us that the foundation of God stands firm and He knows those who are His and we are still His when we become a caregiver. Our standing with Him is not altered because life throws us a curve. He is with us in the juggle, strengthening us and calling us His own.

Today, in the hustle, I will remind myself I am His. He has not abandoned. He is near. My thoughts will be on His ever-abiding presence and I will lean in to Him to hear His heart still beating for me. I’ll trust Him with today’s juggle as I try to get back into the day-to-day of caregiving. I’ll be grateful and purposefully thank Him for not leaving alone to walk this journey. Will you join me?

Do I have to Choose?

This morning I had a couple of scriptures on my mind as I puttered about and got my tutoring done early. The one from 1 Thessalonians 5:23 is still fresh on my mind: Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely and may your whole body, soul and spirit be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.  There are only about 3 or 4 times when Paul uses the phrase God of peace. He uses it here and in Romans a couple of times. And of course, Isaiah says that He is the Prince of Peace.

We have the God of peace or the Prince of Peace living right inside of us. Now that hits me as just a little bit funny since the caregiver's daily life can resemble just about anything but peace. I don't know if it's ever not hectic! I would probably use just about any word to describe daily activities - except peaceful. While each caregiver's journey differs, my days are filled with constant activities like laundry, cooking and pureeing foods, straightening the house (this really doesn't happen all that often!), talking to various health care professionals, feeding, changing, bathing, transferring, providing stimuli (without providing too much), designing and doing therapeutic activities (standing frame, puzzles, range of motion) and whew! I'm tired already. And I haven't even touched the things we have to do to keep ourselves sane and happy. It can become quite the circus.

So after I think about how He is the God of peace in my own life - my thoughts shift to another scripture. In Romans 15:13 Paul says this: May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  This scripture has been I have meditated on for years. I guess I just love the thought of this God of hope filling me with joy and peace so that I have more hope in Him.

We can see He is the God of peace and  hope. Do I ever have to choose between hope and peace? It seems more like a package deal. We get all of Him when His Spirit resides in us as believers. So it seems that all of His hope and peace would be there as well. I do not have to choose between hope and peace - I get the full package deal! He fills us with His hope - AND He fills us with His peace. I think that's a pretty powerful combination and I can use an extra supply of both.

God does not give us just parts of Himself - He fills us up with all He is. There isn't a junior Holy Spirit for kids; or a senior Holy Spirit for the elderly. There is no "special editions" for special cases like caregivers. We get Holy Spirit working in our lives and He will continue to work to the degree we yield to Him - no matter what situation we are in. Ephesians 3:16 says that we are strengthened in our inner man - just by Him being present  in us.

Today I will be thankful that I get the full package deal and that the Spirit of God is at work in me - even in my situation. I will meditate on the truth that He comes with peace and  hope and I don't have to choose between the two. I will purposefully yield myself to Him and allow God to work in my life today -- and be strengthened by the truth that He still works in me - the caregiver. Will you join me?

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...