Deep Sighs

 For caregivers, having a moment here or there to just sit and breathe can be few and far between. We are pretty much on-call 24/7, even if we care for our loved ones long distance. There isn't a time we can just slip away and not be available because we never know when a call may come. Sometimes, it's a small decision. Other times, it can be critical. So, it's important to be on duty and vigilant all the time.

For those who provide around-the-clock up-close-and-personal care for loved ones, it's difficult to find a moment to ourselves, even when we live in a caregiver's cave! But sometimes, the universe aligns just right, and a caregiver gets to sit with a cup of coffee or sip on their tea and take a breath. Even though it's rare, when it does happen, I find myself allowing a long, deep sigh to escape. 

It's involuntary, meaning I didn't plan for it. It just happens. The deep sigh is an emotional response that is healthy, actually. It's part of the body's "emergency response" system and signals that you are still alive, and it's okay. 

This morning, I found this verse in Psalm 38 that says, Lord, all y desire is before You; and my sighing is not hidden from You. (NKJV) When I read it, I just camped there in my thoughts for a while. How could God be that close? This little phrase lets me know that He is so aware of me - so connected to my emotions that He knows when I don't even have words, and all my emotions come out in a huge, deep sigh. 

He's so close that He gets every thought, feeling, emotion, and expression that caused the sigh to develop. And while the sigh signals my sympathetic nervous system that all is okay in the world at least for a moment, God is there for the crazy barrage of thoughts that may follow the sigh. He gets our questions. He understands our emotions, even if we don't! He feels every part of that sigh for us and has the balm to heal our unseen wounds. Man, He is good! 

Today, I'll remind myself that God is so close He can feel my feelings, hear my sighs, and wipe my unseen or unexpressed tears. I'll be thankful that God is not afraid to get close to us, even if we feel like a mess. He walks right into our caregiver's cave and makes Himself at home. He is comfortable with the caregiver. He is comfortable with me. Today, I'll say that out loud - God is comfortable with me. And I will rest in this truth as I trust Him to walk one more day with me. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

If you enjoy these devotionals, I have others! I've expanded my bookstore on Amazon. My devotionals are available in Kindle or print format. The new Bible study guides are now available on Kindle and in print! Check out my growing bookstore: 

I also recently opened my own bookstore. I'm presently filling it up with my books - check out the ones I have available in eBook format. You can download them and read them on your phone! Dove's Fire Ministries Bookstore.

 

Everyone Wants the "W"

 Caregiving is a journey on a road that has many hills and valleys. Some parts of the journey can seem like the hills and valleys are all bumped up next to each other, and there are no breaks in between. This is a pretty accurate description of one day. Sometimes, it explains the emotions of an hour. And sometimes, even less time can occur between the highs and lows. Highs and lows for caregivers can be in so many areas, and even all at the same time. Wins and losses all add up and we just hope that at the end of the day we are in the red emotionally.

No matter how the day's game plays out  - we all want the W in the end!

TheW, in sports terms, is the Win, ultimate victory! Everything doesn't have to run smoothly, and it doesn't have to be the greatest day ever - we just need to feel like we won the day as we crawl into bed each night.

When David was at Ziklag, he was in one of his lowest moments. He'd been rejected by the Philistine army, as the lead commander didn't trust David to fight for them against his own people. So, he and his army of 600 men went back to camp, only to find it all wiped out and all their loved ones carried away captive. 

Get this picture, now. All these Warriors are sitting around the burned-down city of Ziklag. They are all Weeping - big ole Warriors are Weeping or crying thier hearts out, because they are grieving over the loss. If they cried - I can cry too!

They were real Warriors with some serious Weapons. But David didn't gather the troops and head them right into battle. He Waited. First off, David encouraged himself in God's ability - not in his own. Then he asked God for Wisdom. David was an experienced, effective Warrior, yet he Waited for God's Word before he headed off to fight a battle. Once God promised the Win, David and his 600 men headed out.

How many times do we forget the Waiting part? I hurry about my day, because, quite honestly, as you know, there is a LOT to do! But the true Wins come in the Waiting.

Today, I purpose to wait on God instead of running through my tasks. I'll take the time to ask Him for Wisdom and I'll Wait for His answers. I'll Wait for His strength to carry me through the day, no matter what. The true W - Win, comes in the Waiting. Will you wait with me today?

                                                                                                                                           

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Tidying Up the Cave

 

Do you ever just feel alone? Social isolation is real for caregivers. Now that we are mostly post-pandemic and things are going back to something like normal, it reminds us that our lives are anything but normal. I've started taking Chris out more - mostly for stimulation. He acts differently when we are out - I think he's bored with our little 2-bedroom apartment. Lol. And while getting out is so good for both of us, pushing his chair around social settings and outings just serves to remind me how different we are.

Most people have no idea what caregivers deal with on a daily basis. But what's worse is they don't want to get close enough to know. And having no one close is what seems to eat away at us many times. Now, I hope you have plenty of friends and family who are close and keep in touch with you. But sadly, too many caregivers feel stuck alone in their caves. That's where I have been this week. It's okay - I just have to adjust a little, so I don't get swept away in that emotional tide. So, I'm tidying up my cave.

Self-reflection and evaluation are good for us generally. So, I'm taking a look around my own cave to see what I want to keep and what doesn't belong. In the alone times, when we feel like we are tucked away in a cave from the norms of life, we'll find that He is there too. I love that God meets us where we are. 

Think about that a bit. He met Adam and Eve in the garden, even after they sinned. He met Abraham at his tent. God "found" Hagar not once but twice. He came to Moses on the back side of the wilderness and spoke to him from a burning bush. And get this - Moses had been out there for 40 years! Alone. But God came. So, while I am tidying up my cave and adjusting once again, I can trust that He will find me too. 

Whether I feel like my life is being lived by a beautiful stream of living water, or I feel like I'm just trying to survive on the back side of the wilderness, He knows. And He'll come anyway. No wilderness is too barren. No cave is too dark or deep. He can find us - and better yet - He can reach us.

Today, I'll remind myself that God is even present with me in my caregiver's cave. He has time to listen when human ears don't. He understands. He gets us. And He still whispers, My grace is enough. So, I'll trust His grace to carry me through one more day. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

If you enjoy these devotionals, I have others! I've expanded my bookstore on Amazon. My devotionals are available in Kindle or print format. The new Bible study guides are now available on Kindle and in print! Check out my growing bookstore: 

I also recently opened my own bookstore. I'm presently filling it up with my books - check out the ones I have available in eBook format. You can download them and read them on your phone! Dove's Fire Ministries Bookstore.