Skip to main content

Posts

Who Planned This?

 This morning as I was getting around, I was praying for my son. I do this a lot! lol. His chronic breathing issues are troubling and the medical system seems to be tiring of us. So, I took my concerns to God. I was walking and praying and asking for wisdom to handle the situation in the best way. Of course, I was moaning, groaning, and fussing at God for "letting" this all happen. lol - I know you've never done that, but I do.  I took a brief few minutes to think about what like might have looked like. After all, none of us planned on him having a wreck at 24. There are many such unexpected things that happen to disrupt our plans, though. Am I right? My mind went to Job. He was wealthy and had no plans of losing all that wealth in a day. Job didn't plan on his kids all dying in a single tragic accident. He didn't plan on getting sick either. But what Job did plan was that he was going to worship and trust God in the no matter what s. Now that's a plan that ca
Recent posts

Never Runs Out

 This morning, as I was waking up, my mind seemed to already be racing. Some of it was all the stuff I need  to get done today - including those that needed to be done yesterday. I'm also dealing with a lot of emotional baggage right now. For some reason, I feel especially lonely. Like alone- alone. I hope you don't understand, but I'm pretty sure you do. As I was wiping the sleep out of my eyes, my mind was running through all this. Over and over and over. I had to take a couple of minutes to kind of shake myself and remind myself that His peace is still right here. He doesn't have an off switch for when we are sleeping, or not paying attention. His peace remains - it never runs out. Neither does His grace, mercy, and love. They all remain, even when my mind forgets. Then, I had this thought about how I set reminders on my phone. I have tons of them. lol. I have one for any out-of-the-normal meds for me and Chris. There's one for each of the Bible studies I do week

Dealing with Disappointment

Maybe we have all had those moments where we were disappointed with God. I know I have had my times for sure. I always thought He was going to come riding in on His white horse and whisk me out of my stress and pain. When it didn't happen like I imagined, I often thought He'd abandoned me. Sure, He sees. Of course, He hears. But what good is it if He doesn't act? Mary and Martha were disappointed with Jesus. They told Him that if He had been there, then Lazarus, their brother, would not have died. Jesus' reply was that He was the resurrection and the Life. Then, He demonstrated it by bringing Lazarus back from the dead. I can certainly say I've never seen Him do that! But I still believe it. The day I realized that I was disappointed in Him, after all, He didn't come when I thought I needed Him most. It can be frustrating to feel like He's not acting on our behalf. Right now, I'm in that spot. It seems  like He's not doing anything. Now, I know He

The Source of Life

Recently, I had some interactions where I felt like others didn't have a clue what it meant to be a caregiver. Maybe they don't understand how demanding it is 24-7. Their request involved traveling, and it's something I wanted to do with all my heart. But as is often the case, it's just not always easy to travel when you are caring for someone else. I felt like they didn't quite "get" my situation.  With the airlines canceling flights left and right, seemingly on a whim, I can't take a chance of getting stuck in another location. As I was working through my dilemma mentally, I realized that most of the time, it's the other way around. People only see us as caregivers and forget that there is a person inside dying to be recognized. As I was thinking about all of these things, I became very thankful. Why you ask? Because I realized that God sees us fully. He doesn't dish out blessings and spiritual benefits to others and decide we don't get a

He Remains Faithful

  I don't know about you, but it does seem like the world is getting crazier. Maybe it's just that there is so much going on in every arena from politics to schools, churches, and even in our homes. There are so many things to deal with on an emotional level and it can easily become overwhelming. As if caregiving wasn't already overwhelming enough, right? This weekend was one of those weekends when I began to feel overwhelmed past the normal overwhelm. As I was taking my concerns and friends to God in prayer, I was reminded of something that happened to me several years ago. I was standing in my son's room and I was frustrated, emotional, and overwhelmed. I looked up at the ceiling (as if God lives in the sky - and isn't right here right now), and said, I cannot handle one more thing... Immediately, I had a thought. Now, since it was smarter than me - I assumed it was God. It was or what?  That thought, simple as it was, sobered me right up and made me think. I thou

Where No One Dares to Follow

  I don't know how long you've been on your caregiving journey, but I've been on mine for almost 14 years. One of my friends is the caregiver for her son who is now in his 40s. Some of you just started on this journey. I'm still a newbie compared to many others!  There's no doubt that the caregiver's journey is a lonely one. The social isolation is often unbearable. Yet, we adjust. BC (before caregiving) I was super social. I went a lot. I fellowshipped a lot. I traveled miles and miles. But for the last 14 years, all of that has been limited.  Others often try to encourage us or cheer us up. But very few are willing to go where we go.  Recently, I had a long-time friend who wanted to take me out. At first, it was just for a date. Then he decided he wanted us to spend the day together. I enjoyed our day together, but he has no idea all the hoops I had to jump through. lol. I get other invites from time to time, but I don't answer many of them.  What I don

Distractions

  My mind is still hanging out in Matthew 14! I guess I've really been rolling it over and over in my meditations. Today, I want to just look at Peter. He is the only one who stepped out of the boat. He gets a bad rap for sinking. But no one else jumped out onto the water, not even after seeing him walk on the water. How far he walked or how long he walked don't really matter, do they? It was still miraculous that he simply walked on the water.  Peter did something no one else had the guts to do - even if it was for just a few steps...a few seconds. But like many of us, Peter got distracted by the storm. As long as he focused on Jesus and working his way to Him, he walked across the water. But when he looked at the storm , it distracted him. Do you ever have one of those days? We start out with a great attitude determined to work it all out. Then out of nowhere BAM! We get blindsided by something - it could be anything. A bill we didn't expect. Supplies that are not on time