Showing posts with label lovingkindness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lovingkindness. Show all posts

Did You Hear That?

As if the life of a caregiver didn't have enough daily ups and downs, it can seem like life just feels the need to throw a few more circumstances at us sometimes. Yesterday, my day had so many ups and downs my emotions were all drained out by evening. There was good: the mobility van was fixed and running. Then there was bad: now the lift is broke. Of course I had cancelled our ride arrangements for the next two days since I was getting the van back. So we are stuck at home again for a little bit. But such is a day.

Needless to say, today I feel the need to heed the words of Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God. It is difficult to be still when your thoughts are running all around in your head. So I am sipping my second cup of coffee and trying to get my head and my heart to slow down and take this day one second at a time instead of in a whole lump all at once.

I found myself in Psalm 143 during my devotions as I was trying to calm myself down to face the day. The psalmist starts out with a plea to God to:
Hear his prayer
Listen to his pleading
Answer his pleas for help
Caregivers can find themselves in situations where we just want God to hear us, listen to our hearts and answer us in His faithfulness. David goes on in this Psalm to explain what he is feeling at the moment:
My spirit is overwhelmed
My heart is desolate
My heart feels like fainting

He's crying out for answers and help in his situation. And the caregiver asks for nothing less. In verse 7, David says answer me quickly Lord, before my spirit fails. Who hasn't felt like that? Any number of situations can arise in a day of caregiving and we feel like we are just going to faint if God doesn't provide some answers. They don't even have to be the ones we want or like - but we just need some answers.

This morning as I was trying to slow my heart and mind down and absorb something from His word, my eye fell on verse 8. Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning. Can we hear mercy? Is His lovingkindness real enough to feel? Of course my head went off with tons of questions; but my thoughts ended up with the woman the Pharisees brought to the temple. You know, the one the leaders brought to Jesus to condemn? (John 8) 

They were saying she had been caught in sin and should be stoned. But Jesus did not condemn her. He asked the one without sin to throw the first stone at her; and they all just walked away. I wonder if she heard mercy that day? She certainly heard the hate and condemnation in the voices of the Pharisees. Today I need to hear mercy in His voice. While I'm going to guess that God does not fix vans or redeem us from every single situation we face as caregivers, I am going to lean on Him for direction and answers today. 

Today I will meditate on His great, endless mercy. I will purposefully lean in close to Him and listen for His heart beating for me. My thoughts will be on how He can bring peace into a tumultuous situation and calm the emotionally raging soul. And I will cling to His peace today. Will you join me? 

But As For Me...

Psalm 59 was written during a very troubling time for David. I admire his writings because David was so open and honest with his emotions and his feelings. He didn't hesitate to say what he really felt. And in general, you never have to ask yourself, I wonder what he meant by that? Psalm 59 doesn't stray from this pattern as David talks about what he hopes God does to his enemy!

 Just about the time the reader thinks that surely David is way off and has lost it he redeems himself with this statement in verse 16: but as for me...

This phrase is then followed by David's declaration over his own heart. He says that he will sing of the Lord's goodness. He says he will not only sing, but do so joyfully. I cannot honestly say that I have been singing joyfully through adverse circumstances. David concentrates on what God is doing and who He is rather than the adversity surrounding him.

He says he will sing of the Lord's strength - not his own.
He'll sing of His lovingkindness...
He'll sing of how the Lord has been his stronghold..and refuge even in distress...

He didn't concentrate on what he felt God wasn't doing for him...but on what God was  doing. I must admit there are times I get frustrated because of the things I feel God is not doing on my behalf. But today, I will meditate on what He is doing around me, through me and in my situation. Will you join me?

Because of the Enemy

For the believer there is no doubt that Holy Spirit lives in us and strengthens us. Ephesians 3:16b says it this way: ....be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man...Take a second to think about that. We are strengthened from the inside out - because Holy Spirit lives inside of our very being.

 Holy Spirit resides in us to give us the strength to remain in Christ no matter what the circumstances. And actually, our circumstances many times drive us straight back to Him. You may be rocking along thinking life is good and some tragedy or trauma wakes you right out of your stupor. We tend to start trying to figure out where we left God! Or where He went that this terrible thing has occurred. But He never moved. He is everywhere - all the time and will be for all time...even throughout eternity.
 

In an odd way, adversity has its way of driving us to Him. In Psalm 59:9 the psalmist says this: because of his strength I will watch for You, for God is my stronghold. At first I found this verse very confusing...is it  because of His strength? Because of the Lord's strength I will watch for the Lord? While that's not a bad concept, I do not think that's what David meant. He was in a very adverse situation. Saul had sent men to his house to kill him. They were outside his house watching for him to make one wrong move, just step out the door and they would end his life immediately. Saul probably sent more than two or three strong men. Think about looking out your living room window and seeing a few armed men lying in wait...for you. Then around outside the kitchen window are even more men...just waiting.  A quick look out each window reveals the same thing. It was because of the enemy's strength... that David was waiting and watching for God.

 David goes on to say in verse10: My God in His lovingkindness will meet me....It's because of the strength of our enemy, our circumstances, or whatever life throws at us - that we learn to seek Him. Not for relief - but simply to feel His presence. The relief doesn't matter as much anymore....we just need to know that He will meet us...right where we are. We need to rest in Him knowing that we did not sin to find ourselves in this position. The church tends to want to condemn us as having no faith. But only through faith do any of us realize that the Helper lives inside us to give us strength to face our enemy day by day. Only through faith can we really sit quietly waiting to hear His heart beat...we are still in this battle. We did not give up when adversity struck. We certainly found out that we were not serving God as prevention. We serve Him because He is God.

 So, today in the midst of the battle, with the enemy stalking waiting for us to give up or give in, let us wait for His strength. My God in His lovingkindness will meet us here...

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...