Showing posts with label cares. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cares. Show all posts

Leave it There

Chris and I made the trip up to Guthrie this week to see my mom again. One of my sisters was there and so was daddy for a little bit. My mom is losing it a little more all the time, but she seems pleasant. She also still remembers all of us. My sister showed her a picture one of our longtime family friends posted on Facebook this week. It is of many of the old-timers who were the prayer warriors at the church we grew up in. Mama named everyone one of them! It's funny what she remembers and what she doesn't. It's like her head is running around in all her old memories and randomly pulling them out one by one. I'm thankful she has good memories for her head to get lost in.

I don't think this trip was as emotional for me, so maybe I'm adjusting. It does help to see her happy. Who'd have thought she would love bingo though?

As I was driving home, I was thinking about these ladies who led the way for us. They taught my mama how to pray and she taught me. Maybe I learned more from watching her take everything to Him in prayer... and leave it there. I remember those old school prayer meetings - these women could pray the house down for sure. I was so curious as a small child and I remember specifically being at Virgie's house and all of them in there praying. I would stand at the old screen door and cup my hands so I could see in better. I'd stand and watch for what seemed like hours. I didn't know it was training. lol

BC (before caregiving) I learned how to pray. But during caregiving, I've learned more of the leave it there part. There are times we pray but don't feel a thing and don't see any change. But we know through faith we can take our burdens to Him. He'll take them so we don't have to carry them. That can actually be difficult for caregivers. Our situations often push us to do things outside our comfort zones, things unfamiliar and difficult. But we press through. We are forced to be independent - ain't no one else gonna do it, right? We roll up our sleeves and tackle many uncomfortable and hard situations. But leaving it there - letting God have our cares, our worries, our struggles, our insecurities, is really the hard part sometimes.

1 Peter 5:7 comes to mind. Casting all your care on Him for He cares for you. That is very difficult for most caregivers. You don't often find us asking for help. We are so used to being in I'll do it myself mode - because we have to be if things are going to get done - giving Him anything at all feels like losing control. Maybe that act of taking our cares and concerns to Him and leaving them there - with Him - is what we need. It puts Him back in control - let Him care for us. I've said that before - He is the caregiver's caregiver. Let's let Him carry us. Let's let Him carry our heavy burdens and deepest concerns. His shoulders are big enough - and He doesn't get tired! Ever.

Today I will be thinking about how to cast my "anxious thoughts" over to Him. My efforts will be in letting go of them and letting Him handle them for me. I'll be taking my thoughts, worries, concerns, anxieties to Him and casting them in His lap and leaving them there. I'll meditate on how He is my caregiver - He cares for me. I will trust Him - with me. Will you join me?

Freedom is in the Wait

I got up this morning with the tasks of the day wearing on my mind. Do you have mornings like that? It seems like the alarm not only wakes up your body, but it wakes up the mind and signals it to start running (or thinking) a marathon. That's what it was like for me this morning.

Over the years, I have learned a few strategies that help with that a bit. I write down what I have to do for the day now and prioritize what has to be done first. It seems like it helps me get more organized and get more accomplished in a day. But it doesn't help slow my mind down one bit. Actually, it seems like it frees it up to run other races.

My usual morning goes something like this:

  • push snooze 3-4 times when the alarm goes off at 5:30
  • drag out of bed around 6
  • put on coffee
  • change and bolus Chris
  • get coffee, Bible, notebooks and laptop and head for the recliner
  • stare at wall sipping coffee while my mind goes through daily tasks at 100 mph
  • open Bible......try to make sense of what God is trying to say......
That's about it - every morning.

This morning my Bible fell open to Psalm 119 and the first verse I saw was 45 which says I will walk in freedom for I have devoted myself to your commandments. And off went my mind in a hurried rush. As the question queen I had about 100 of them rolling out of my mind immediately. I thought about how David must not have been a caregiver because freedom is something we definitely don't have. It's something we gave up to be able to care for our loved one. Our lives seem to be anything but free. 

My mind starting racing about true definition of freedom and how my freedom isn't measured in the natural - but in the spirit. Jesus said it is the truth that makes us free. BC (before caregiving) I participated in prison ministry and one of the most touching songs I heard was written by a prisoner who wrote about being free in Christ even though he was living a life behind bars. As caregivers it can feel like life has us on restrictions. That can be difficult to sort through.

But what did the psalmist know about freedom? Or what did he know about the lack of freedom?And why did he throw it in here - in the middle of this psalm? I think he saw God's word as a liberating factor in his life. David had spent years running from Saul, waiting for the promise of kingship. He never raised his hand against Saul even though he could have rightfully taken the throne God had promised him. Instead, he waited.

There's that four-letter word wait again. It keeps coming up doesn't it? Is it just me or does it feel like every day is spent waiting on Him anymore? What are we waiting on Him to do? In truth - He's waiting on us too - He just wants us to bring it all to Him. All of it. All our fears. All our doubts. All our frustrations. All our anxiety. He says to bring it all to Him - and He'll take it as a trade-in for rest. 

That's what Paul said. He said to give Him all your cares -  Why? So He can do the caring for you! So we can walk this life free from fear, guilt, frustration, doubt....and that's what our freedom is all about. It's not about being able to come and go as we want (although that would be nice). It's about not having life burden us down - being free in Him.

Today I am going to explore this freedom. My thoughts will be on how truly free I am no matter what my situation looks like. I will meditate on how free my spirit is; and I'll turn my thoughts to how He will take all my cares. He'll take everything I give Him - but nothing I withhold. And today I'll find it in myself to figure out a way to let go - and let God. I'll let Him do the work as I just rest in Him. Will you join me?

How Good Can You Throw?

Do you remember the various games we used to play as a child that required we throw a ball? I can remember throwing a ball over the house with someone else. It was fun because you never knew exactly when it was coming back over or where it would come from or where it would land! I always prided myself on how easily I could throw the ball over the house. And I had a pretty accurate eye and arm when it came to throwing baseballs or footballs too! But when it comes to throwing my cares on Him it seems like I lost my touch!

 1 Peter 5:7 says that we should be casting all  your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. This casting is not a passively handing or gently tossing action. It is forcefully throwing all the anxiety of my day, week, or life on Him. Why? Because He is going to do all  the caring for me! I can roll it all over onto Him and let Him do my worrying. Now of course it is only worrying when we are carrying our own load and trying to find our own way in the midst of the struggle. For God, it's not worry at all. He is literally caring  for us.

 I hope you can see this picture. It's not just that He cares for us in the sense that He has great concern over the matters that are concerning us. Of course He loves us, tends to us and carries us...but in this sense, when we can roll all of the things that concern us, all of the things that cause us anxiety over onto Him - then He will do the caring... so we won't have to!

 Make today a day when you hand it all over to Him and you do not worry about stuff at all! It's like having a day off emotionally. Let Him do the caring for you today! I think I will try it again tomorrow too!

The Truth About Faith

There is a freedom that comes in being totally honest with yourself about your emotions and your situation. And quite frankly you simply cannot be honest with God until you are open and honest with yourself. How can you cast you cares on Him if you do not acknowledge that you have them?

 There is a barrier that is erected when we do not look at our situations and ourselves in truth. We cannot ask for His strength until we realize we have none; we will not look for faith until we see ours has been shaken; and we cannot ask Him to carry a load for us that we will not admit we have.

 Faith is not ignoring the obvious and trying to walk blindly through life as if hardship does not exist. True faith rises up in our hearts in the midst of the longest storm, the darkest night and our loneliest moments and grabs hold of Him. But we must admit our circumstances to be able to reach for Him. Remember Jesus said those who seek Him must seek Him in spirit and in truth.

 Faith is not a mask we wear that shields us from seeing what is going on around us. And confession isn't a tool to make it all go away. True faith sees and knows exactly what is happening around us and our confession isn't a denial of circumstance as much as a statement that no matter what the circumstance I will still trust Him.

 Today free yourself from the bondage of ignoring your life. It is there and it is real. The pain is real and so are the tears. And only in the moment that we can say this hurts can He bring healing to our soul. Only in pure and open honesty can we begin to cast our cares on Him...and let Him care for us.

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...