Showing posts with label caregivers loneliness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label caregivers loneliness. Show all posts

A Plan for the Unplanned

Chris at his first 5K

 If anyone knows about how things don't go as planned, it's caregivers. All it takes is a sneeze, a cough, a huge "accident' (and you know what I mean!) to mess up the best-laid plans. Many mornings we get up and start about the day and may even be productive. But all of a sudden it turns topsy-turvey and ends up with calls to doctors, home health, case managers, or suppliers. I know you know that drill!

But what are we supposed to do when things don't go as planned? Is there a plan for when plans fail? I know you understand what it's like to make plans for an outing, a family get together, or even a trip to the store and have to cancel at the last minute. It's easy to get to a place where you don't even want to make plans. 

I'm sure Daniel didn't plan on living his life as a slave. Joseph didn't either. All through scriptures we find stories of real people who had their real lives uprooted or disrupted by various events. Hebrews 11 has a long list we often call the "Hall of Faith." These people didn't have perfect lives either. Yet they continued to trust and believe God. 

This morning as I was preparing for the devotion I do on Facebook Live, I found myself in Psalm 13. David didn't have a perfect life either. We talked a bit in yesterday's devotion about how he took in Mephibosheth, the disabled son of Jonathan. That demonstrates the heart of God. 

In Psalm 13, David is asking where God went. He asks God how long He is going to look the other way. Yes, this is the same David who said in Psalm 139 that God was intimately acquainted with our ways and knows our thoughts before we think them and our words before we say them. But here he is in despair. He's feeling lost and forsaken. I know I don't have to tell you about that -it's part of the caregiver's journey. David felt it all - the loneliness, being forsaken, forgotten, overlooked - you fill in your blanks because I've got a lot of those emotions myself. We all do from time to time. 

But one thing I love about David is that he ends most of his psalms with a declaration. This one he declares:

  • I will trust Your unfailing love
  • I will rejoice
  • I will sing to the Lord because He is good to me
Today, even though I feel a bit discombobulated, I declare that I will trust God for one more day. I'll trust that He still loves me and He has good plans for me. I will rejoice in the victories He's brought so far even if I don't feel victorious today. And I will sing to Him - not because I'm good - but because He is good. His goodness remains steady and unwavered by the things we face each day. He is still good - and He is still God. I'll trust Him for today - will you join me?

The Finding


I love reading the Word. Hebrews 4:14 says it’s alive, and active. I find that true as I can read passages I know I’ve read many times before and see something brand new in it. Such is the case this morning. This year I wanted to read the Bible straight through again as I haven’t done that in a while. I found myself in chapter 16 of Genesis reading and re-reading the story of Hagar. I’ve shared many pieces of this chapter in this devotional over the years. But I saw something else today that spoke to my heart.
In verse 7, after Sarah has sent her away, it says, the Angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water….I read that two or three times. Then, I wrote in my journal that if He found her – He must have been looking for her.

We know Sarah is her mistress and she’s lived in Abraham’s household for years. But now she’s been thrust out of her norm – and is pregnant to boot. What a predicament! There’s no doubt in my mind that she is uncomfortable, upset, worried, and in a place of distress both emotionally and physically. Yet God found her right there in that spot.

I found this personally encouraging. God doesn’t avoid us when we find ourselves in rough spots, and caregivers can have plenty of those, can’t we? People often remain silent or distant, sometimes because they do care but do not know what to do with us. Others just ignore us – they aren’t trying to be “mean” they often do not know what to say or do. We can find ourselves in some very lonely spots in life. We can find ourselves in some dirty spots, some hard spots. Each day presents challenges others don’t often understand and we can feel cheated out of life’s “pleasures” like simple freedoms of running to the store or grabbing coffee with a friend.

But God can find us where we are. Hagar was sent out because she had a bad attitude. I will first admit that especially early on in my caregiving years, I have been guilty of that! But if God can seek her out even when she’s wrong – doesn’t that provide me with some hope that He will seek me out too? That He will seek you out too?

I’ve said it before but it’s worth saying again – He doesn’t abandon us when life gets difficult or ugly. When we don’t live in that “picture perfect” world, He doesn’t avoid it – He comes to find us. He walks the path of the caregiver with us. And sometimes He has to carry us too. But He is present. Psalm 46:1 comes to mind here, God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in times of trouble.

Today, I’m going to be thankful that God is willing to find me right in my situation no matter how challenging it seems. My meditations will be on His willing presence in the midst of my trouble. I’ll rely on Him for the wisdom and strength to make it through this day. Will you join me?

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...