Showing posts with label Psalm 121. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Psalm 121. Show all posts

A Little Help

 


Have you ever felt like you could use a little help? Who am I talking to, right? As caregivers a little help is great. One of the things we deal with is such a long laundry list of things that need to get done in a day. I'm sure our lists are all long, but they can vary based on the health and needs of our loved ones. My son is total care. That means I have to feed, change, dress, bathe, and transfer him over the course of the day. Although he is awake, he is not yet capable of doing much of anything. He can stand! That makes transfers easier, for sure.

Sometimes, an aid is provided. What they don't understand is that everything they do helps. Even the smallest things like sweeping the floors, dusting, or taking out the trash. Those are all things that I won't have to do if they do them. Recently, I've looked at pricing for hiring someone to come in and help clean my apartment. Then I thought, I'm hiring someone to do things the aid is PAID to do but doesn't want to do. 

I think to myself, I just need a little help.

While I was thinking about all this, a couple of scriptures came to mind. As believers, we trust in God for our help. I'll be the first to stand up and say that He has certainly carried me through many days I didn't think I could make it. He undergirds me with strength. He fills me with His peace and hope! He is indeed my help.

But how many times do we miss the little things He may do throughout our days? Situations that all of a sudden work out, may just be His handiwork. Psalm 28:7 says The Lord is my strength, my shield from every danger; I trust Him with all my heart. He helps me, my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving. (NLT) 

Then of course my favorite is Psalm 121:2 My help comes from the Lord, who made the heavens and the earth! (NLT)


Today, I will remind myself that the Lord is my help. He carries me. He soothes my soul. He calms my emotions. He is with me. Even though I feel like I could use a little help with household chores - I know that God is the one who helps my soul. I will give Him thanks for being here to strengthen my heart so I can make another day - will you join me?

Sleepless Nights

This morning, as I was studying the Bible and reading some familiar passages, I landed in Psalm 121. It's an all-time favorite and I made the first verse or two into a song during the three weeks I lived in the ICU waiting room hoping my son would wake up. This first verse speaks of God being our helper and how the psalmist was looking to Him alone for help. It's not the aides, though a good one can be helpful. It's not the doctors or nurses, although they are an integral part of a good care team. But it is the Lord who is our helper - help, especially for our souls, comes solely from Him.

That's something to hold onto to encourage our hearts on a day to day basis, for sure! But today, my thoughts settled on verse 4. He who keeps you will not slumber, behold He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. Now, as a caregiver, you can understand how important the commodity of sleep is. Personally, sometimes I get a decent 6 hours of sleep, but there are many sleepless nights. I get grumpy if I don't get enough sleep even though I don't need as much as others. :-)

God, the ultimate caregiver, doesn't even need to sleep. That means He can keep a constant watch over us day and night. He doesn't take breaks. He doesn't take vacations, and He simply doesn't sleep. His watchful eye is always on us. The KJV says in Psalm 127:2 that the Lord gives to His beloved even in their sleep. I like that.

I love that God doesn't have to rest from being with me. Like a watchful father, He seizes those precious moments like a parent watching a child sleep. Did you ever watch your kid sleep? They seem so precious and innocent. You want to just scoop them up - but don't dare risk waking them, of course! So, you just stand there and watch them breathe.

God watches over us whether we are sleeping or waking and He never takes a break. Sometimes I have fallen into a dead sleep out of sheer exhaustion. Caregivers do that a lot I found out. But God doesn't do that. He sees us in those most exhausted states and extends His grace to us over and over again.

Today, I will be thankful that God continues to watch over us and He never takes a break. My thoughts will be on how He enjoys just watching us breathe. I'll meditate on His nearness and declare with the psalmist that the nearness of God is my good. And I will trust Him for just one more day. Will you join me?

He's Got This!

Bible, coffee cup, pen and paper
This morning my Bible seemed to fall open to Psalm 121 which is, of course, one of my favorites like all the others. It brings me a calm assurance that He is with me, He won't faint, He will keep me no matter what life may throw at me today. Each verse for me bears a promise I can hold on to.

I will life up my eyes to the hills, where shall my help come from?
Obviously, our help isn't in the mountains or the hills. One version reads "does my help come from there?" It does not. Maybe David was surveying the mountains around Jerusalem as he was asking for help and strength to face whatever might be present or next. He answers his own question in verse two.

My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.
This is a statement of faith. God is my help. Period. And since He created and sustains heaven and earth - He's big enough to walk through this situation with me - carrying me - helping me. I will keep my eyes on Him!

He will not allow your foot to slip; he who keeps you will not slumber or sleep.
He sustains me. I do not sustain myself. He will keep me from slipping, from falling beneath the load of caregiving, from the onslaught of my own emotions. He does not sleep on the job, won't doze off while I'm talking to Him, and is awake and attentive to my needs. He keeps me.

The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
I am not in charge of keeping me. He is. He will hold me, comfort me, and keep me intact spiritually, emotionally and physically. He is my shade - the protector of my right hand - signifying my "power." He provides my strength and provides protection for it by shading it from the heat. It's only up to me to stay under that shade where I am safe and secure.

The sun will not smite you by day, nor the moon by night.
I understand He protects us from the sun - the heat of the day which can dry us out. It can bear down on us and cause us to become dehydrated - exactly why we need to stay refreshed in His Spirit and the word. He keeps us from being dried out and getting blown away by the "heat" life turns up from time to time. But the moon? Who needs protection from the moon? I do. It is in those night seasons that the pain intensifies. It's those long nights when the fevers go high and my faith falls short. A long, lonely, dark night can sap the soul's strength. But He protects us from being smitten during the night seasons.

The Lord will protect you from evil; He will keep your soul.
God keeps the "forever" parts of us. The body may fail, but He keeps the soul - the part that makes us uniquely us. He keeps the part of us that lives on when the body dies, it's a forever protection. Talk about being "covered" by insurance! He's got us - nothing, absolutely nothing can get to our innermost being as long as we stay hidden in His heart. He protects the part of us that matters the most and nothing can harm our spirit. We are in Him.

The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forever.
He's got this. He's got us. On the days, hours, minutes or the few seconds we may feel like we have it all together and under control - He's got us. On those days, weeks, months and years we feel like life is falling apart around us or going on without us - He's got us. Regardless of how we feel, He's got us. Forever.

Today, I will meditate on this psalm and the truths it contains. I will rest in Him just a little easier knowing He's got me covered day and night, He's guarding my heart and my soul, He is my shade and He watches over me purposefully intent on keeping me and presenting me before Himself spotless and pure. I will yield to Him today and trust that He's got this. He's got me! Will you join me?

Slightly Inconvenienced

This week I've been trying to make arrangements for my upcoming trip. This is the fourth year for my daughter and I to take a weekend away. Sometimes it's so difficult to get out for a day or two. Of course, this planning is on top of all the normal daily stuff I have to do.

I had the weekend all lined out and at the last minute, the sitter for Friday cancelled on me. I was just shy of frantic, a little bit desperate and had to fight off depression's tightening grip.

Times like those start my mind going in a whirlwind. I felt like I was inconveniencing everyone. I'm not a person who likes to ask for help often, and most of the time I'd just as soon do it myself. But I can't sit and get out both! lol It's the curse of independence - sometimes good and sometimes bad.

First of all, I hate to ask for help, but you know there are always people who say Call me if you need anything. But they really don't mean it. Well, they seem to mean it until you call, right? Then it's this or that excuse and for me, it can feel like I am really disrupting their lives. So, I just don't ask. It's honestly easier that way and no one (except me) is inconvenienced.

Caregiving is "slightly" inconvenient. For me, my world stopped with a phone call and never returned to normal. I was in Chicago enjoying life's adventure and headed to Africa the next January and it all screeched to a stop. Dreams crushed, life on "hold" I became a caregiver to my adult, now handicapped son. Not what dreams were made of in my teen years, you know? Not my picture of how life was supposed to turn out.

On one hand, caregiving is a joy - I'm glad I'm the one who gets to take care of my son. I do so because of the great love I have for him. Yet it is not convenient to get things done - fight with agencies and providers, work with lazy aides, and just make it through anything-but-routine days.

As I was being engulfed in the dark cloud of depression yesterday and my emotions were running a muck, I had to think of all the ways God has provided over the years. I sat down with my Bible and coffee (that's a powerful duo!) and actually thought about crying. The tears were...right... there... but I find them useless.

I chose to give my "inconvenience" to God. I asked Him for help. And by the end of the day it had all worked out. Not only that, but future trips I may want to take are covered too. (And it's going to save me some money!)

Once again I'm reminded even in the midst of my frustration that my help comes from the Lord. Nurses, aides, case managers and even family are not my "help." Psalm 121 says I will look to the Lord who made heaven and earth. 

Today my meditation will be on seeing Him as my help. I'll run to Him today with my cares once again. My thoughts will be on letting Him be my strength - instead of trying to be my own. Today I will work on letting Him be my peace. I won't ask Him for peace and then walk away wringing my hands.  I'll rest and let Him work today as I trust Him and rest in Him for one more day. Will you join me?

Present Continuous Action

At the end of the day, we have to be honest with ourselves about everything. I have to look back and wonder if I fully trusted Him or if I tried to take the control of situations on myself.

Yesterday, we discussed Psalm 91 and today I want to look at one little phrase: I am trusting Him. It's found in the last part of verse 2. It demonstrates the present continuous tense. It means, I am trusting Him right now - and I will continue to do so into the future.

There are so many things in the caregiver's day/life that are unpredictable. We never know when our loved one might become ill, or suffer a fall even though we are careful and take the necessary precautions. Shipments of supplies often get lost and we have to make purchases to make up the difference; or aides don't show up at their scheduled time. I've had case managers and nurses call to come by at the drop of a hat. And in my instance, I never know exactly how my son is going to take any given day. Some days he's compliant and relaxed and others he is uptight and resistant for no apparent reason. After a while it can all start stacking up into a very unpredictable mess. We can find ourselves in a state of constant change trying to keep up with the craziness of each day. (Just a personal note - for us "Type A's" this can be very difficult! ) (smile)

No matter what a day brings all I know is that every day we continue to trust Him. When this caregiving journey began, Psalm 121 became very real to me. Verse 2 says My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth. I knew that we had excellent doctors and medical professionals working with my son - but they were not my help. Only the Lord could help. As the caregiving journey has continued, the depth of trust has deepened. I am trusting Him. I have been trusting Him, continue to trust Him today and the action of trusting will continue on into the future. I'm not looking for any other options.

While my son was in ICU his friend lent me a guitar. I wrote a simple song based out of Psalm 121 using basically the same words. You can watch it via my Facebook page if you'd like using this link. I recorded it in my son's hospital room. It's my declaration that I will continue to trust Him no matter what a day or life throws at me.

Today I will meditate on how He is my help whether I have human "help"' or not! I will turn my thoughts to how He watches over our souls and protects us from the inside out. My mind will be set on His ever-abiding presence and I will rest in Him. Will you join me as we continue to trust Him?

No Sleeping on the Job!

Sometimes the caregiver is left floundering on their own and sometimes there are organizations or individuals who help them out. There are programs to help pay for aides and supplies that are very beneficial for helping us stay sane. When I have an aide it means I get out a little more to run, or run errands and that is good. There are nurses who come periodically to check my son out and see that he is healthy and being taken care of. Family members often sit with my son so that I can do things I enjoy or escape for a weekend. I am very appreciative of this "village" that helps me out from time to time.

However, I learned a long time back when this caregiving journey first began that my help comes from the Lord. I had no idea of the the types of situations and decisions I would be facing on a daily basis back then, but I knew if I was going to survive I would have to look at Him for my help. I began to meditate on Psalm 121 while we were still living in the ICU waiting room. I stayed there day and night for 3 weeks before we moved to an isolation room on a regular floor where we remained for over 3 months.

A few days into our ICU stay I was in prayer and thought about all the wonderful nurses and doctors who were providing exceptional care for my son. But as I was thinking about what a great job they were doing I also realized that they couldn't help me. They could talk to me, calm me down, try to ease my fears...but they were not my help - only God could under gird me in the time of trouble.

One of my son's friends had loaned me a guitar for the hospital stay and I sat down and put some chords and a melody to Psalm 121. I knew I would have to look to God for my soul's help, for my peace and comfort and that He alone was my true help.  I knew I was in a position to look to Him and only Him. As the last 7 years of caregiving have unfolded, I continue to look to Him for strength, comfort and wisdom as the daily walk continues and I meditate on this psalm often.

I will look to the Lord
Where does my help come from? 
My help comes from the Lord
Who made heaven and earth
He will not allow your foot to slip
He who keeps you will not slumber
Behold, He who keeps Israel 
Will never slumber nor sleep 

It's such a comforting thing for me to know that God's not sleeping on the job! He is always watching over my soul and keeping me safely tucked in His own heart.

Today I will meditate on the fact that He does not rest; but He continuously keeps me and watches over my soul so that I do not faint. My thoughts will be on the truth that He is always on the job and He never even takes a break to rest. And I will rest knowing He is my peace and strength. Will you join me?

If you'd like to see the video I made of the song I wrote after I got in my son's room you can see it on my facebook page here: Psalm 121.

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