Showing posts with label my help. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my help. Show all posts

#Overwhelm

 

chris looking intently at his sister

Do you ever wake up in the morning feeling like you have an extra 9 million things to do on top of the regular 9 million things you do every day anyway? As if caregiving wasn't enough for a day, right? It's easy to feel like we are pulling in so many directions. And, of course, there'll be someone standing off in the distance reminding us to take time for yourself - the caregiver needs care too.  Smh. We sure do - but when? Am I right?

It can be so easy to feel overwhelmed. It's an overwhelm that doesn't go away while you're sleeping at night. It just sits there waiting until you get up, then boom. I think it never really goes away on most days. However, there are a few brief reprieves here and there. 

Does it ever feel like there are many things vying for your attention? The internet. My clients. My phone. Another text. eMails. Sometimes, even the things we use to cope and get through our days play into our emotional overwhelm. 

But there's this one scripture that is on my mind this morning. Psalm 61:2 - when my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. David had his moments of overwhelm too. That just makes sense since he was a king running an entire kingdom! In Hebrew, overwhelm is a word that could be translated as shrouded, clothed, faint, hidden, or overwhelmed. Boy, that about says it all doesn't it?

How easily our hearts can become shrouded by our responsibilities and concerns as caregivers. But get this - the next word is lead. Guess what that means in the original Hebrew? It's also a primitive root and it means to guide, transport, bring or lead. When I am too overwhelmed to crawl - God can carry me and my overwhelmed heart to the Rock. He will not leave me stranded wrangling with my emotions or concerns. He will pick me up - with all my woes and transport me into His heart where He protects me, strengthens me, provides for me, and gives me His peace. Wow.

Today, I will wait for Him to pick up this mess I have become and carry me right to His heart. Then, I will hand Him each thing that is on my plate one by one. I'll let Him take me and my overwhelm into His heart will I will listen for its steady beat. If you look for me today - that's where you'll find me. Will you join me?

So Far So Good

Yesterday I lost a family member and somehow I think grieving losses like that are maybe not "more difficult" as a caregiver, but more complicated. If that makes sense.

Many caregivers, myself included, live with what is called a living grief. That basically means we grieve the loss of our loved one - but they didn't die. They are here - but they are not here. It's a grief that doesn't allow for any closure and it's ongoing. Then when you add any more grief on top of that - it's a very heavy load to carry. Fortunately, I know the Lord and I can take all my cares to Him and drop them off! (I know, that's not KJV!)

This morning I was sitting, drinking coffee and staring at the wall as it was all sinking in. I thought about not doing a devotion - I needed on myself. lol. I opened up an email and saw this scripture which was exactly what I needed to hear today. It's 1 Samuel 7:12. Samuel has just become judge in Israel and the Children of Israel had just torn down all the idols and returned to the Lord with a whole heart.

The Philistines approached and were hoping for a quick slaughter. But God had other ideas. Now Samuel was a judge and a prophet, but he did not know natural warfare. He could not lead the charge. God knew this - but I believe He saw the hearts of the people turning wholly to Him, and He applauded. Only to the Philistines it sounded like thunder and they got all confused. In the confusion, God and the Israelites wiped them out that day!

Then comes verse 12. Samuel sets up a large stone and named it "Ebenezer" which means stone of help. And then he said, up to this point - God has helped us. That just clicked with me this morning. Up to this point in my life, God has been my help. And as I face another day of caregiving and a season of grieving - He will still be my help.

My loose translation of that is so far - so good!  God has been my help, He is my help and He will continue being my help. Now that I can hold on to for today as I turn my heart wholly to Him and do the real work - resting in Him.

Today I will remind myself of God's ever abiding presence. I will acknowledge His help throughout my journey and use it to remind myself that He's still here for the rest of the journey as well. So far God has helped me - and He has no other intentions just because my world got rocked again. My thoughts will be on how I can rest in Him and how I can let Him be my help, my source, my everything. And just like all the other days - I'll trust Him. I'll wait for Him. I'll rest in Him. Will you join me?

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...