Showing posts with label choices. Show all posts
Showing posts with label choices. Show all posts

Rainy Days and Mondays

I'm a 70's child and I remember when "Rainy Days and Mondays" was popular on the radio.It's got such a smooth sound it can get stuck in your head. For the caregiver "Mondays" doesn't mean too much really, since everyday  can look pretty much the same.

We get up on Monday mornings with just as much to do as we had when we got up on Sunday morning. The caregiver's responsibilities don't change much, if any, from day to day. I usually try to make some small variances on the weekends, like letting my son sleep in just a little bit longer; but the primary responsibilities do not change with the day of the week. When you are caring for another whole person these do not change much. There's still bathing, pureeing foods, feeding, transferring, dressing, and lots of other things that have to be done every single day. If we are blue because it's Monday, we are likely blue every day of the week!

I went in search of one of the scriptures we, as good church people, learn as a child. This is the day the Lord has made - we will rejoice and be glad in it.  I found it in Psalm 118:24. For the caregiver everyday is the same - for all of us - everyday is the day the Lord has made and has given us. Our attitude determines how we handle the situations we will face on any given day; and we will face them! There's always something! Aides who don't show up (if you're lucky enough to have one at all), supplies are not delivered on time, an appliance breaks, you run out of briefs or wipes, any one of a thousand things can happen in a caregiver's day - and usually does. It's our attitude that determines our day - not the day of the week. Mondays are just like Fridays which are just like Tuesdays and Wednesdays....they are all days He has given us with our loved ones.

Rather than thinking about how today is Monday and it's supposed to be rough, I'm going to shift my thinking to the fact that each day is a gift from Him. The psalm that contains this verse is full of praise to the Lord for all He has done. At the very beginning the psalmist lists a few things He's done like:

  • He is good and His mercy endures forever
  • I called on the Lord and He answered me
  • The Lord is on my side
  • The Lord is for me
Having a rough day? Just pick one of these to meditate on today. Let it mold our attitudes into one of thankfulness for all He has done. It's all about focus.

Today I will meditate on how God is on my side - and  He is for me! As I go about the caregiving tasks that are necessary I will think about how He gives me the strength to carry on. My thoughts will be on how He really is for me and not against me; and He is for me when it feels like life is against me! I will be thankful today that He is with me. Will you join me?

Where did He Go?

I'm taking comfort today from the fact that God is not only with me - but He cannot leave me. If we are honest, as caregivers we do experience those times that we feel like He has abandoned us altogether. But today I have been thinking about the fact that it is literally impossible for Him to leave us. After all, where would He go? We can at least understand the basic concept of His omnipresence with our finite minds. This means that He is literally everywhere so that leaves nowhere for Him to go. He really cannot leave us so there are no truer words spoken than Hebrews 13:5b - I will never leave or forsake you.

But these words go back way before the author of Hebrews reiterated them. They were spoken to Moses in Deuteronomy 31. And then God reminded Joshua in the first chapter that He would not leave. Today this means a lot to me. On one hand I can understand that God cannot leave me - it's an impossibility. On the other His words to his children in Deuteronomy, Joshua and Hebrews to me mean that even if He could He would not leave! He's committed to us for the long haul.

Today my meditation will be not so much on the fact that He is with me - as the truth that He chooses to be with me. There is a stark difference between someone who is just committed to being with you and sticks it out because of that commitment and one who chooses to be with you for good no matter what might come.

This day I will recall to mind God's unchangeable presence that is walking with me through this storm and continues to abide with me. Today I'm going to rest in Him and enjoy His presence. Will you join me?

You Can't Order that Online!

In many cases the caregiver is not able to get out of the house much, or at least not very easily. Because of this, over the last few years I've learned you can order almost anything online. I order toilet paper, cleaning supplies, clothes, household goods, furniture, electronic devices, books, music, movies, medical supplies and that's just all I can think of off the top of my head. I even order frozen foods! There are some places that ship fresh fruit - but so far I haven't found it to be cost effective. But I've also learned that there are a few things that simply cannot be ordered online. Things like milk and butter, hair cuts, manicures, massages and dog grooming just cannot be ordered online!

I have found that in most instances caregivers are very frugal and creative; they have this knack for problem solving and figuring out how to get the impossible done. Whether we ask for help, order it online or find some other way to get it done - nearly everything is possible. But perhaps the most crucial need of the caregiver cannot be ordered online, or fulfilled by anyone else. We have to be able to encourage ourselves. As we face a barrage of decisions and situations each day we can either succumb to the pressure and allow ourselves to be depressed - or we can encourage ourselves in the Lord.

David found himself in a very sticky situation in 1 Samuel 30. He and his men came back to Ziklag to find it ransacked and their wives and children taken captive. Everyone blamed him and were talking of killing him; and he was greatly distressed (v.6). But as he stood there with nothing - it says David encouraged himself in the Lord. There are times when the caregiver has to make the choice to be crushed or encouraged; and sometimes (most times) we have to do it ourselves. Even if someone brings an encouraging message we must choose to embrace it - or stay underneath the load.

Today I am going to choose to take my courage and strength from the Holy Spirit. No matter what types of difficulties I may face today I will not let them take me under and suck me into the "caregiver's fog." I think of all the times throughout the Psalms when David used the phrase "I will" or "My soul will" and I really think he was making a conscious choice to trust, worship, praise, etc. Today I will do this same thing- My choice is to trust Him for this one more day and lean on Him for strength to make it through. I will meditate on His greatness and I will be encouraged in Him today - will you join me?

I'll Take That as a Challenge!

Benaiah got a whole 4 verses in the Bible, but this dude was a warrior of warriors. He actually earned himself the position of being over King David's bodyguard. How? Well in just this short passage we find out that he did several phenomenal things. He killed 2 of Moab's best warriors. He also went into hand-to-hand with an Egyptian warrior; the thing was that Benaiah only had a club and the Egyptian warrior had a sword. I guess Benaiah decided he'd rather fight with the sword so he took the sword away from the Egyptian and used it to kill him. There's no disgrace like being killed with your own sword!

But the thing that I find most intriguing about Benaiah is that he killed a lion. That is enough when you think about the lack of technological and tactical weaponry back then. But he had other factors. Not only was he facing a lion (the king of the jungle!) he was in a pit; and besides that it was snowy which means no place for a good foothold. That's all admirable enough. But here's the one little phrase that keeps running through my mind this morning he chased a lion down into a pit...He then caught  the lion and killed it. Did you get that? He chased the lion into the pit...he wasn't simply defending himself from the lion and just happened to survive - he chased that kitty down there and killed it on purpose!

That's how I want to tackle today. Surmounting challenges start piling up and thoughts of defeat run rampant. Caregivers have so many daily challenges and in so many different arenas it can be tempting to give up and become a victim of circumstances. But not today! Today let us take on the attitude of a warrior. Let's chase our lions into snowy pits and kill them instead of sitting down and letting it have us for lunch! Take today - it's yours. You are still breathing, trusting, living...don't give up - don't give in. I will choose today to forget about passivity and live with purpose and passion. I may not be able to chase down a lion but I can chase down and kill out fear, doubt and any other thing that tries to take the peace He gives me and replace it with fear. Not on my watch! Not today! I'm challenging life back today - will you join me?

One Step At A Time

One thing that I have learned since becoming  caregiver is that I was taking life for granted. And there are times when I miss my "real life" as I call it. But I am learning to live this one better all the time. I just have to enjoy and embrace each moment as it comes.

I am also a runner (see related blogs!). So I really do understand just putting one foot in front of the other! When I ran my first half marathon I thought about that some. I would pick a target out in front of me and think just run to there. And of course when I got there I'd choose another. Then before I knew it  as already at the 9 mile marker. I was like, wow! that was fast! I could not run the whole marathon all at one time it could only be done one step at a time.

A day can offer many emotional changes and challenges. But it is wisdom sometimes to not look at the entire picture, but only the part you have to handle today....then just walk today out one step at a time.

It only takes finding peace for one moment for it to spill into the next. The apostle Paul told the Colossians to let  the peace of God rule in their hearts. That means I can choose to allow it  to rule rather than what I see or feel for this moment. So take some time today and think about just letting His peace rule for a minute...and then or another...and just one more moment..until His peace has leaked out all through your day!

The Stare

  Do you ever just find yourself sitting and staring at the wall? It doesn't really happen too often because, quite frankly, who has tim...