I cannot say I have always been "faithful" on this caregiving journey. It has a way at chipping away at the false definitions of faith that are fostered by some of today's erroneous teachings. I can say my faith has been completely redefined.
But on the CG journey I have felt like I lost faith. I've cussed, ranted and raved about things I have not liked on this journey. I've felt like God wasn't there. Many a night I've stood in my son's room, or in the hallway in the wee hours of the morning and looked toward the heavens and cried out, where are You now? I need you here! as I tried to get my son's fever to break or was contemplating a midnight run to the ER.
But when the morning comes and the sun rises yet again - just as He put it in place all those years ago - I realize He walked through the long dark night with me. Even though I felt totally faith-less; He was faith-full. I believe it was Hudson Taylor that said when we feel like we don't have any faith - it's okay because God is still full of faith or faith-full for us.He has all the faith we need.
Today I am going to meditate on His faithfulness. I'm going to purposefully turn my mind away from my feelings of faithlessness - and focus on the truth that He is always faithful - there's no lack and there is no gap! With my thoughts and heart I will embrace His faithfulness and I will willingly let it carry me through today. Will you join me?
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