Closer Than He's Ever Been

Crazy, crazy week. I'll spare you the details, but suffice it to say I've seen one of every basic medical worker except a surgeon this week. Yup - including firefighters, EMT personnel, ER physicians and techs, who by the way don't know how to transfer a handicapped person from a table to a chair, to home visit nurses and case managers. It's been one of those weeks - one caregivers are all too familiar with.

Over the last couple of hectic days, I also made a choice. I decided I would not focus on all the things that were demanding my attention. This doesn't mean I abandoned my responsibilities in any way - I just didn't let them have me. Instead of wringing my hands, I chose to lift them. I stopped in the middle of the craziness and focused on Him.

I also refocused in the natural too. How do you do that? I'm glad you asked. It can be easy to get off on some of the many things we can't do because of our caregiving situations. So, instead of thinking about how I couldn't travel, or do this or that, I decided to think about what I have done since I became a caregiver. Here are a few things I've done that might not have happened otherwise:

• got my Master's in Health Education
• became a health coach
• became a full-time freelance writer
• ran a marathon (just one)
• learned to love to run
• worked up to advanced belts in taekwondo
• learned to work from home
• taught English via skype to nations around the world
• taught in an orphanage in Pakistan

That's just a few of the "cool" things I've done since I became a caregiver. Simply shifting my focus made a big difference in my attitude. But I also made this shift spiritually. I started thinking about all He's done for us. I thought about how He has provided all along the way. You can tell I haven't missed a meal! lol We have not gone without for one day. He reestablished me in Him - and in His word and gave me such a deeper meaning of faith - a faith that is now applicable in everyday life. I learned how to be totally open and honest with God about my feelings - and He didn't get mad at me.

His love is sweeter and His grace is closer than they've ever been to me. I think I know Him just a little better and I wouldn't trade for that. His word has new life-sustaining meaning for me. I've heard Him singing over me - heard the song of His heart and felt His tender love for me. His sustaining power is real and his Word is rooted deeper in my heart than ever before. 

He has filled me with peace, comforted me when I was distraught, and walked this journey with me. He has not abandoned me or left me stranded emotionally, physically, or spiritually. He's closer than He's ever been. And for that I am thankful. The psalmist said, the nearness of my God is good.

Today I will meditate on how good it is to have God walking this journey with me. I'll tune my thoughts in to His love and grace and let Him have my focus today. I'll turn my meditations to His ever abiding presence, His sustaining mercy, His everlasting kindness and grace. And that's where I will rest my emotions and thoughts as I trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?