As a full-time caregiver our emotions can run on raw, and dealing with the day-to-day stuff is difficult enough. It's like that last straw that breaks the camel's back, or the last apple that upsets the applecart. Emotions can run stretched and tight. Yesterday, I let God know exactly how I felt about it all. I was frustrated, angry, disappointed and hurting. And I dumped it all out before Him. And He listened.
So, this morning as I was preparing for live devotions, two verses stood out to me. We are working our way through Psalm 119. Verse 145 says I cried to You with all my heart and then again in the next verse David says, I cried to You! Been there - done that. I am pretty sure there's not a caregiver out there who hasn't done that! But maybe it's just me. lol.
I can pour my heart out at the foot of His throne - and He doesn't get mad at me or fry me down to my toenails. He could, you know. He listens. He waits. He lets me rant and rave. He knows I'm frustrated - He understands.
The next verse that lept off the page at me was verse 151. You are near O Lord, Your commandments are truth. And that is where I camped. How many times on this caregiving journey have I gotten to the point where I can't think, I am numb from feeling too much. It seems I know absolutely nothing. But I can break it down to two truths to hold on to.
- I know God is there.
- I know His word is true.