Monday, August 20, 2018

Caregiver Extremes

Chris standing
I just want to admit up front that emotionally I can be all over the place. That's nothing new, really. But with the impending move, it seems to me like it's a little bit worse. In case I forgot to fill you in, we are moving! My daughter and SIL are buying a huge house so we can all move in. They are going to help me with Chris and I'll help them with kids and day-to-day stuff as well. We are all excited and I believe it's a good move.

As I anticipate change though, my thoughts and emotions go from extreme excitement to sheer terror. Eventually, I adjust and change is not usually as rough as I thought - but I'm all over the place until I adjust and settle in.

Extremes are not all that uncommon for caregivers, especially on some days. Maybe it's just me but I can be booking along having a great day and a memory or a photo or almost anything can spark raw emotions. Not to brag or anything, but I can go from chipper and happy to calm and weepy in under 10 seconds. I'm so glad that God understands this roller coaster ride and already knows if the next turn will bring an up moment or a down one. He's prepared to handle either one every single time. He doesn't condemn me for either extreme He just gathers up the broken pieces of my heart and glues it all back together with His love, compassion and care. He often steps right into the middle of either extreme and carefully does His mending. I'm guessing that's what keeps me running back to Him.

Today, as I pack and plan, I will be meditating on His careful watching care. My meditations will be on how He never takes His eyes off me. I'll think about how accepting He is of me and my emotional swings. He offers no condemnation or criticism - only care and concern for me. I'm going to stop and think about that for a while right now - and trust Him for just one more day - will you join me?

2 comments:

  1. Its not just you for sure Jeanie! I care for my wife who suffered a TBI 6 years ago. I can think I am doing pretty good one second and the next be in the pit of despair. The battle of the mind is as real as the physical battles we caregivers face day to day. Take care, sounds like a great thing the move will be

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    1. I hear you loud and clear! The battle field is definitely the mind and the emotions - memories can be our best or worst enemy at any given time! Thanks for sharing and thanks for reading!

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