Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Between Me and Him

I had a whole lot on my heart this morning as I headed out the door for my early morning run. I told Siri to play "Bless the Lord Oh My Soul" by Matt Redman. As I ran, prayed and praised, I emptied my heavy heart out before Him. The roads I left my burdens on don't look any heavier for the wear, but my feet and heart became lighter as I abandoned my soul to Him in praise even in the midst of this storm.

As I prayed and cast off cares so He could carry them instead of me, I uncovered many pains that were hidden deep inside. Some were too difficult to express in words and I let my heart turn them loose as they fell into His. I thought, there are some things that will always just be between me and Him. Things I can't express...too deep for words. Some of the pain was so deep I couldn't even get my thoughts around it. I know I just let it go - suspended between my heart and His - forever.

Caregivers can tend to try to "fix" everything making it difficult to let go of them and trust them into another's hands. 1 Peter 5:7 reminds us to cast your anxieties, cares, worries, over onto Him - for He cares for you. In my mind, maybe just a broad, but practical application, I'd say we are to throw it all over into His hands - and let Him do the caring for us. 

Today, that is what I propose to do. Those deep feelings, inexpressable griefs, hidden sorrows - I'll turn loose of them and let them fall into His heart and hands so He can do it for me. I'll give Him those "just between me and Him" things to take care of for me. And I'll meditate on His goodness, his care for me, His compassion and greatness. Then, I will trust Him for just one more day - will you join me?

4 comments:

  1. Wow...I really needed this message tonight. Maybe now I can finally let some of my problems go...at least for tonight. Thanks,Jeanie I appreciate the help...I sure needed it!

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    1. Thank you for reading and sharing a part of your journey with us!

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  2. Thank you for sharing.. My husband came in this afternoon and found me weeping. I did not know how to express to him what was in my heart...like you. My words failed me.There are so many feelings going on .inside me that I feel like a twine ball all scrambled up My mom has ended up moving back to the city we live in and I am the only sibling out of five still living here. She is staying g with us temporarily until she gets her apartment in a senior li ing apartment I know that this is only a season and it would t be forever, but I am struggling with all of it.

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    1. Thank you for sharing a piece of your journey with us. I care for my aunt who is waiting for assisted living and my son who has a brain injury from an accident. These are different dynamics. Dealing with our elderly loved one is a whole different ball game - very emotional and draining at times - and yes - we are allowed to say that! It's okay to dump it all on Him as needed. Thanks for reading.

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