This week has been more than enough for a normal life, let alone a caregiving life. I will spare you all the details, but the biggest problem by far was being without internet for nearly two days. I handled it well, I think. I painted, I learned some new chords on the ukulele and spent some great time with my grands. But I got behind on work, so now my frustration level is greater than it was before.
That's just one of the additional situations I'm dealing with on top of caregiving. Sometimes it feels like I am stretched tight like a rubber band and I'm going to pop with any more pressure. Life can feel really ugly sometimes, and I don't always deal with it well. I've learned to find beauty in little things like dainty flowers along the front walkway, or those "weeds" out back that bear beautiful flowers. And of course, they get cut down because they are not valuable to others - they only bring beauty to my eyes. No one seems to understand that, and that's okay.
So, the other day as I was going through my aunt's things and found that beautiful poem by my grandmother - I also found one by someone I don't know. It says her name is "Sister Pauline Relaford" and she cared for her mom through a long illness. Here's what the top of the paper says: Sister Pauline Relaford faithfully cared for her beloved mother during a long illness. Sometimes she felt unimportant and forgotten, and grieved that she could not come to church or serve her Lord more. After her mother's death, the first Sunday she came to church the Lord gave her this song to sing in the midst of the congregation.