Tuesday, September 24, 2019

My Polite Journal

This morning I took some time to pour my heart out in my journal. My heart has been heavy for some time now. There are many things going on - but I'll spare you the details. (You're welcome!) If you haven't tried journaling, it can be a good strategy for stress relief. It's a safe place to let it all hang out! I had stopped for a while but this year I have picked it back up. Let me just say that I put more than my woes in my journal. I usually end with a prayer - or I write what God is showing me, what I am learning - and all those deep philosophical questions that rarely have answers. It's a polite catch-all for my sundry, sometimes crazy thoughts.

As I finished up the entry this morning, I ended with a couple of statements which became the first two lines of this poem:

Lord, hold me and hide me
Let me know You are beside me
As life's turbulent tides
Roll over and over me - 
Comfort me - pull me close
and help me see
There's more to life than the pain I feel
There's more to life than what
seems so real
Whisper to my soul that You won't abandon
But that You'll swoop me up
Out of the depths of this emotional canyon 
Remind me  can trust You even though
I am battle-worn
Let me know You've still got me
even though I'm bloody and torn
For in You I find my soul's true healing balm
Remind me I am not alone even though 
I look up and everyone's gone
You are there to speak and bring calm
Restore my joy, Restore my peace,
Restore my song
Help me remember You are with me and
You are for me all along

After I finished writing that I glanced at my open Bible and read from Psalm 119. Verse 132 says, Look upon me and be merciful to me, as Your custom is toward those who love Your name. He is always merciful, always faithful, always graceful toward us who continue to come back to Him because we love His name. 

Today, I will remember He alone has the healing balm for life. I'll meditate on His mercy that is new every morning and is rich toward us who love His name. I'll tie my heart to His - and listen to His beat over mine.. as I trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?

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