Boy, can my days get complicated fast! Trying to balance taking care of my son and working from home can become a bit overwhelming. You know that caregiving alone is a lot of responsibilities, and they are daily. There aren't really any days "off" because care has to be done every single day. Even if I slack on my work responsibilities, there's no time off from caregiving.
It seems like lately, work has been my biggest stressor. Chris is doing well, but that means more time working him, stretching him, feeding him, and finding different things to stimulate his brain so it can rebuild. All of that is good, especially his progress, but it takes chunks of time. That can mean I have less time (and energy) to do the work that makes the money around here. Lol. I say all that to say - I get stressed. I know many of you can identify and have your own caregiving stressors to deal with.
But this morning, I read Psalm 94:19 with new eyes. It says, In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul. There are three things that stood out to me. First - "in" my anxieties. Secondly, the anxieties within me (they are all inside of me - not outside). And thirdly, comforts is plural, so that indicates more than one comfort - or more than one time He'll comfort me.
God sees our frustrations, worries, doubts, and anxieties. He's familiar with the ones we haven't even figured out we have yet. And He's got a comfort to match each and every one. I love that. But - what really stood out to me this morning was the "in" at the first of the verse. He doesn't tell me to get it all fixed and come back when I'm ready to listen. He doesn't tell me He'll wait until I'm not on edge anymore. He just walks right into my anxious thoughts and feelings and extends a comfort that matches it. Now, it is still up to me whether I want to embrace His comfort and peace - or stay in my anxious state.
I love that He isn't afraid of my "anxious thoughts," and He doesn't distance Himself from me because of them. We find Him walking right up to us with peace and comfort right there in the multitude of our anxieties. When we are in the middle of crazy thoughts, He's right there too. He won't shun us, condemn us, or avoid us because our lives don't make sense to us in the moment. What a great God He is. My anxious thoughts will never scare Him away. In fact, the Prince of Peace may take a step closer in the middle of them just so I can experience His peace and grace.
Today, I'll remind myself that no matter how crazy and hectic my thoughts and emotions may become, He is in the midst of them, waiting for me to accept His peace. I will lean in to His heart today and wait for Him so that His peace can guard my heart and mind. Will you join me?
I also recently opened my own bookstore. I'm presently filling it up with my books - check out the ones I have available in eBook format. You can download them and read them on your phone! Dove's Fire Ministries Bookstore.