Skip to main content

The Abandoned Soul

chris in the recliner looking back at mom

Does it ever feel like everyone has abandoned you? It seems that they adjust to your new caregiving "normal" and then just go on with their lives, and you are not a part of it. Sometimes, not often, I get a little help, but I feel like my son was abandoned. His friends all got to go on with their lives - and they should have, but he's left alone and only dances through their memories from time to time.

These are some of the things running through my mind yesterday as we met with yet another therapist who doesn't see my son as worth their time. I should be used to it by now, right? In those moments, I feel abandoned and weak. As I was driving away, tears filling my eyes, I glanced at him through the rearview mirror. I thought he's still my son. He doesn't look, act, or move like he used to, and I miss that! But he's still in there, and I refuse to give up.

In that moment, it was like I got a sense that God looks at us that way sometimes too. When life leaves us crippled emotionally and drained physically. He looks at us with so much love and compassion and says, she (or he) is still mine. People may walk in and out of our lives, but God continues to tend to our abandoned souls.

I know you understand how complicated emotions, living grief, and crazy thoughts can be! And God sees each and every one, and still chooses to stick around! He knows who we were BC (before caregiving). He really does get us. Those crazy emotions and unbridled thoughts don't scare Him away for even one second. Instead, He gently swoops up each tear before it escapes and treasures it - as if it is a silent plea for help. He quietly and carefully tends to the abandoned soul bringing peace, comfort, direction, grace, and love. 

Today, I will remind myself that He can carry it all for me. I'll roll every concern, no matter how big or how small, over into His lap. I'll let God take care of them for me today; I have a lot to do anyway! :-)
My thoughts will be on how His grace is sufficient for this day - and I will refuse to worry about tomorrow as I trust Him for just one more day - will you join me?



Download your copy of Poems for Caregivers for free! 
Book cover of poems for caregivers

Comments

  1. Our circumstances may be different (we are dealing with terminal cancer), but the feeling of abandonment is the same. Thanks for your encouraging words today. Blessings to you and your son today. You are never alone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so sorry to hear of your circumstances. Thankfully, God is faithful and no situations are off-limits to His grace. Thank you for your kind words. And thanks for reading! Prayers and gentle cyber hugs to you.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

We Are His!

  Social isolation is real, for caregivers. Actually, most of us dealt with it LONG before the COVID pandemic. It was almost amusing, if it hadn't been so serious, to see people whining and crying about having to stay home and "miss" all the social interaction. I wrote a post welcoming them to our world. Many of us have lived a life of social isolation for years. Our "norm" just become more complicated during the pandemic.  I guess the aloneness is what made this scripture stand out in my private devotions this morning. It's a familiar passage, and yes, I was reading it because yesterday was Thanksgiving, and giving thanks was on my mind.  Psalm 100 is just five short verses and I really enjoy the New Living Translation, but any translation or paraphrase is good! Verse three is the one that stood out to me today. It says Acknowledge that He is God! He made us, and we are His. We are His people, the sheep of His pasture. I noticed, of course, that the caregiv

One Little Catch

  There always seems to be a catch doesn't there? I think as caregivers we find ourselves in spots with catches a lot! The things that should be simple to navigate or often complex due to caregiving responsibilities. simple things like going to grab a prescription that's ready or swing by the grocery store are much more difficult when you have to take into account the care of a loved one.  People may say, It's easy - just go - but by the time they get to the "go" part our minds are burdened with all it takes to just go. For me, it means clothing and transferring another whole human being! lol - There's no just  jumping in the car and heading out, right? It's opening and lowering the ramp - getting the chair in the van and situation properly. Then, getting all the buckles in place and secure before we can "just go." Sometimes God's answers seem to be complex too. In Psalm 50 verse 15, God says He will rescue us - all we have to do (just....) i

Caregiver Burnout is Real

  Do you ever just get too tired? Do you ever want to quit? Do you ever sit down for a whole 30 seconds and think about not getting back up? Ever? Who am I kidding? Sometimes I forget who I'm talking to. Lol. As caregivers, burnout is real. But the problem for most of us, is we don't get a break even in the midst of burnout, right? Let's face it. If we had a bit more help we might  avoid burnout - but once we feel that we are in a season of burnout and stressed out - there's still no help. It's easy to feel stuck. I try to do a few things to avoid burnout and to cope. Someone told me one time that I had learned how to live even in the midst of the situation. I think she was right. I have learned to slow down and enjoy an afternoon cup of tea (or coffee!!!). I try to get outside as much as possible because sunshine and fresh air are essential to a healthy life. Some days that means sitting on the patio so I can see Chris in the recliner through the window. But I'