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When I Can't See

 This morning, it's cloudy and rainy here. I like a nice rainy day now and then. When I was a kid, I'd curl up with a book or two and read the day away. Boy, how I wouldn't love one of those kinds of days right now! But for the caregiver, it is not meant to be. Lol. But the cloudy day did help spark some deeper thoughts that I've been rolling around.

Do you ever go through those times when you can't see or feel God? One thing I've tried to do with this blog is to be gut-level honest about emotions, thoughts, and all the crazy parts of being caregivers. There are days when I don't see or feel God's hand at work in my life. Many of my middle-of-the-night experiences have led to me crying out to God and asking Him if He sees us. If He hears us. And IF He does, why isn't He answering? But in most Christian circles, those raw emotions and legit questions are not allowed. They show a "lack of faith." But do they?

On this cloudy day, I cannot see the sun. It's a thick, cloudy, super rainy day, and barely any light is getting through. The sun is obscured from reaching us. But is it really? The presence of the clouds doesn't mean the sun isn't out there shining on. Right? I just can't see it. But it didn't go away. Where would it go? Lol.

Even in the most "normal" circumstances, our clear sight of God can be disrupted. But for caregivers, it's even worse. Every day caregiving stuff can cloud our view of the One we love - the One we need so desperately. But it doesn't mean that He's not there. Like the sun, He is shining brightly on the other side.

It's those gray days that can drag us down the most. Those times when we don't see Him moving, can't hear Him breathing, and can't see Him reaching for our hearts. But He is.

Isn't believing that He is still there when we don't feel, see, or experience Him what faith is all about? Don't let anyone try to tell you that you don't have faith because you don't get the answers you want when you want them. You're still holding on, right? It may be to what feels like a quickly thinning thread, but you're still gripping it! Caregivers have got more guts and faith than any other class of people, in my opinion. We just keep reaching for Him...

  • when we are tired
  • when we are lost
  • when strength is gone
  • when we can't think straight
  • when others tell us we shouldn't...
That's faith. The fact that you are still reading this blog - demonstrates that you are still reaching, even if you cannot see. Man, is that awesome!

Today, I will take Him at His word and trust that He is working on my behalf - even if I don't see or sense that He is doing a thing. It's a good day to just silently wait for Him. Will you join me?


31 Days in Psalm 31 devotional book cover

Check out my bookstores. I have eBook devotionals, Bible study guides, poetry, and more in my Dove's Fire Ministries bookstore. My Amazon bookshelf has a couple of those in print or on Kindle. My devotional 31 Days in Psalm 31 is all about seeking God from the cave! Check it out!


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