In the Thick of the Battle

Most mornings, right after I get my son up, I put on some sort of teaching. I try to find a YouTube video that is about an hour or shorter for him to watch. Well, I figure his spirit man needs to be fed - it didn't get damaged in the wreck. Our soul is always protected and hidden in God. So, I put on some teachers I know he liked or that were familiar to him. Our favorites are Duane Sherriff, Loui Giglio, Francis Chan, and Steven Futrick. I kind of randomly rotate through these teachers, so he gets some different "flavors."

Yesterday, I heard whoever we were listening to say that Job prayed before his troubles, during trouble, and after his troubles were over. So, that sparked me to read in Job during my personal devotions this morning. 

In Chapter 6, Job is in the thick of the battle. His friends have joined him, and in their grief, they have sat with him for 7 days without being able to say a word. They probably should have remained silent because their words began to cut through Job's soul like flaming arrows. They accused him of not trusting God, committing some horrible sin, or doing something that displeased God. They suggested that Job was being punished and all he needed to do was to repent, and God would lift his struggles and pain all away. Sound familiar?

As a caregiver, I've heard all the religious answers. I've been told to fast, march around the walls of brain injury, roar like a lion (yes, for real), and all sorts of other things to make my son better. I've wrestled with thoughts that maybe I did mess up somewhere along the way. But even if I did, doesn't God have grace for that?

In the sixth chapter, Job is beginning to pour out his soul. He says some things that I can relate to as I deal with the deep blows and wounds trauma leaves behind. He says these types of things in the NLT:

• My sadness weighs more than the sands of the sea (v.3)
• I wish God would crush me (and make all this end) (v.9)
• I wish God would just kill me (v. 9)
• I do not have the strength to endure (v. 11)

He is in the middle of the battle we face many times on an emotional level. I could so relate to his feelings of defeat, hopelessness, and angst. 

But in the middle of his tumultuous thoughts, Job says this in verse 10: At least I can take comfort in this: Despite the pain, I have not denied the words of the Holy One. That reminded me of Psalm 119:50, which says in the Old KJV; this is my comfort in my affliction, that Your word has quickened me.

Even in the thick of the battle, God's got our backs. People may not understand; they don't sit with us like Job's friends. For the first few weeks of caregiving, or immediately after trauma, they are attentive and helpful. Once caregiving becomes the new norm, they tend to disappear, like you don't need a friend anymore, right? But God remains. I like that. I need that.

It truly brings comfort to know that God's word still works in what we may deem a broken life. It's definitely not "normal." Our abnormal circumstances don't render God's word, mercy, grace, peace, or truth ineffective. Sometimes, pressing through the pain, tears, grief, and discomforts of caregiving actually helps us hear God's heart better. There seems to not be as much "life" in the way.

Today, I will purposefully press past my emotions, pain, and crazy thought patterns into what remains normal, secure, and stable - God's Word. I'll make it a point to meditate on scriptures about the God who never changes because I need His consistency in my life. My thoughts will be on His willingness to just sit with me in the battle, and I'll allow Him to strengthen me to take on today. Then, I'll sit back and watch as He continues to bring His purpose and glory to manifestation to light in me - even in the thick of the battle. Will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

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If you think about it, God is the only constant in our lives. His mercies are new every morning - for our sakes, not His. His grace covers us no matter how the ebbs and flows of life roll. His love is unending, undeterred, and forever - it did not change or become confused when we became caregivers. His word still stands, and we can hold on to it for survival and spiritual sustenance. And that's what I intend to do today! Will you join me?