Caregiving Isn't the End - It's a Beginning

Eli, Chris, and me

 I don't know about you, but at first, caregiving felt like the end of my life. It definitely brought about a lot of changes in my lifestyle. "A lot" is an understatement. Literally everything in my life changed that day. It just took it awhile to sink in. It was also very difficult to adapt to a fluid, constantly changing situation. But here we are over 15 years later - still adapting in fluid circumstances. Lol. We just never know what a day will bring do we?

Caregiving was the end of my freedom, traveling, vision, plans, and life as I knew it. But my relationship with God didn't end - and that's the important part. I will admit that God and I were on rocky terms there for awhile. I knew He didn't cause the tragedy or circumstances. But He didn't do anything to stop them from happening either. That led to major trust issues between me and God. (Did I say that out loud?) 

It's okay to admit when we don't trust Him or feel like that trust has been broken by circumstances. Mary and Martha expressed their disappointment with Jesus in John 11, but they both expressed it differently. In verse 20, it says Martha went to meet Jesus when she heard He was coming. In verse 21, she said, if you had been here...surely she felt betrayed, abandoned, and disappointed by Jesus. He didn't condemn her for saying what was on her heart and mind. And He won't condemn us either - being open and honest is the key to developing a strong relationship - whether it's with God or people.

Mary also expressed her disgust, but in a very different way. In verse 20, it says that when Martha left to go meet Jesus - Mary sat in the house. Her displeasure was shown by her inactivity. Even though she didn't use words, Mary was letting Jesus and everyone else know how she felt. Jesus didn't condemn her either. As a matter of fact, in verse 28, Martha sends word to Mary that Jesus was asking for her. I love that.

We all express emotions and disappointment differently. I know that on any given day - my response to disappointment or frustration may be expressed by sitting quietly sipping a cup of coffee and staring at the wall. On other days (or even the same day) I may rant and rave and cuss a little bit out of sheer frustration over circumstances. Either way - God's got me.

He doesn't condemn us for our reactions, our disappointments, our struggles. Instead, He meets us in them. 

Today, I will be thankful that God doesn't expect me to get all my emotions and feelings packaged up perfectly before coming to Him. My thoughts will be on how He comes for me - even in the storm, even in the trouble, even in the lion's den of life - He meets me there. I'll be grateful that He comes to me and stays with me no matter what. I'm also thankful that He is okay with me expressing my feelings - even if it's when I am disappointed in Him. He still loves me. He still gets me. I know I can trust Him for one more day - will you join me?

 ________________________________________________________

Affirmations for Caregivers

Cover of Affirmations for Caregivers
I wrote Affirmations for Caregivers because it was what I needed to hear! This 31-day journal includes 31 scripturally based affirmations. Each day, the affirmation is followed by a short writing prompt and a verse or two to read. I also have videos on YouTube that coincide with each day's affirmation.

 Here is an example from Day 16:

Day 16: I Am Embraced
Affirmation: I will find grace to help me in my time of need today. I will bring my cares, concerns, weaknesses, and needs to the throne of grace. I have an open invitation. God will meet me there with the grace I need for today. He is not afraid of my weaknesses, He embraces them and strengthens me by His grace.

                                Write an invitation to God inviting Him into your day. Then, write an invitation
                                from God inviting you to trust His strength and grace.

                            Read Hebrews 4:14-16

New Release! Peace Out!

Cover of Peace Out! devotional




I just released the 31-day devotional Peace Out! It's in the Bible. Each day's scripture has something to do with peace - and how we can continue to enjoy it and walk in it - no matter what! It's available on Kindle and print in my Amazon bookstore and in printable ebook form on my new website Dove's Fire Publications. 






Comments

  1. AnonymousJune 11, 2024 at 4:45 AM

    You could be writing my story. We planed to travel the world! Now, we are lucky to make a trip to the doctors office or to church. I have to admit I blame God at times. After all He is in charge. He could heal our loved ones or have prevented the whole scenario. I could say so much more. God knows I will never abandon my husband until the day He calls one of us home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jeanie OlingerJune 11, 2024 at 6:42 AM

      It's quite natural to blame God - it's the beginning of being honest with Him about how we feel - I've done it. I still do it. I still have a long list of "whys" that He hasn't answered. It's an amazing level of trust to push past all of that and keep trusting Him in the difficulties of caregiving.

      Thanks for reading!
      Jeanie

      Delete

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