Yelling at the Preacher
One of the things we do most mornings as soon as I get Chris up is to watch some sort of ministry video on YouTube. I figure there is nothing wrong with Christopher's spirit man - he needs to be fed too! I rotate through a few I know that he liked before the accident and a couple of my favorites. Over the weekend we were watching a video of one of our must-watch preachers and it seriously upset me.
He was talking about David and how he lost his son Absalom. The scripture reference was in 2 Samuel where Absalom was killed and David went into deep mourning. He was mourning so deeply he had laid aside his responsibilities. The preacher was trying to be encouraging by saying that David missed enjoying the victory his army just had because he was "too busy" mourning.
I have to say the preaching was not erroneous - but I still got very upset. I began talking to my TV. It was his son for crying out loud I said. Then I said, he lost his son! He is allowed to grieve!
I realize that this guy probably hasn't experienced grief that deeply like many caregivers have. I honestly hope he never understands. But I also want the church-world as a whole to learn that it's okay to grieve.
The faith movement had a lot of good things, positive things, but it was lacking in many ways. One of those detriments was trying to confess away circumstances or faking it until you make it. Don't get me wrong - I am a huge proponent of keeping our confessions, words, and thoughts positive. There really is a vibe there and it is scriptural. But God made us a complete being and sometimes, we must grieve and there is absolutely no condemnation.
We have many pictures of grief in scriptures, and yes, I am working on an outline for a book about it! We know that Isaiah 53 says Jesus carried our grief to the cross, but He also carried our sins - and it didn't take away our capacity to sin. (Well, not mine anyway! lol) We can still grieve. Grief is a natural process and is a healthy response to a loss. And if anyone knows about loss - it's the caregiver.
We can grieve. We can cry. We may scream or even cuss a little. (Well, that's just me, right?) Some days we can become so frustrated that it takes some time to work ourselves out of the caregiver funk. God never throws us away. He doesn't "should" on us either. You shouldn't grieve. You shouldn't cry. You shouldn't feel that way. My response is - well I do - so now what! :-)
God will meet us right in our emotions, He is the one who made us emotional beings in the first place. He won't condemn them, but He will help us work through them. He will carry us while we figure them out. He brings comfort and peace as needed and sits there and waits until we can receive it. I love that about God.
Today, I'll roll all my crazy thoughts over onto Him. I will take everything to Him today, knowing that He does not have a delete button, and He hasn't put out a "do not disturb" sign. He will take me just like I am and He chooses to walk with me on this crazy super hilly, sometimes mountainous caregiving path. And He does it without complaining, growing tired, or giving up. I'm so thankful He's with me, and I know I can trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?
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Affirmations for Caregivers
New Release! Peace Out!
I just released the 31-day devotional Peace Out! It's in the Bible. Each day's scripture has something to do with peace - and how we can continue to enjoy it and walk in it - no matter what! It's available on Kindle and print in my Amazon bookstore. You can also get the eBook on Buy Me A Coffee.
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