Not A Sin!

 I spent a large portion of my personal devotion time this morning in Psalm 19. In the first few verses, David is lost in God's creation. He's taking a look at nature and how it is constantly declaring God's glory. If we miss it - that's on us! I stopped to meditate on the last part of verse 4 which in the New Living (1996) translates it this way: The sun lives in the heavens where God placed it. That's think-worthy!

As David is meditating on the wonders of creation, his mind begins to draw the connection between nature and the Word. It's the word that holds everything in place. David couldn't have read Paul's writings in Colossians, where he describes how God created everything and the Son (the Word John 1:1) holds it all together. What a neat thought! David got the connection though!

Then, in verse 12, David seems to be repentant. He begins asking God to cleanse him of things he isn't even aware of that might be displeasing to God, the Creator. I've found that repentance naturally follows a true encounter with God. It's never pride that comes when one sees or experiences God. It is a very humbling experience. (Isaiah 6)

David finishes off Psalm 19 with a simple prayer. May the words of my mouth and the meditations (thoughts)  in my heart be pleasing to You, Lord. What a powerful prayer. So humble. But it made me feel bad for some of my thoughts. I'm pretty sure some of the crazy things that go through my mind each day, sparked mostly from caregiving, are not pleasing to God. Or, are they?

As caregivers, we may express our loss, our grief, confusion, frustration, and lots of other you-can-fill-in-the-blank stuff! But is it wrong? I think it's NOT a sin. Actually, I'm leaning more toward God feeling honored that we bring it to Him and trust Him with the deepest (sometimes darkest) feelings hiding out in the recesses of our hearts and minds. I think He is pleased that we bring Him our all - even when it is ugly or socially unacceptable. I also believe that in that most vulnerable moment where we feel raw, empty, and a thousand other things - He swoops in and picks us up and pulls us just a little closer to His heart. He wants us to hear it beat for us. Now I ask you - would God calm a sinner. Smile. 

I think not. The "sinner" cannot be consoled or comforted by God because they are not looking for Him. They are not seeking Him. A "sinner" isn't trying to move closer to God - they distance themselves from grace. Hosea says they "forsake their own mercy." I think God doesn't see us as sinners or our thoughts and deep emotions as sins. He is always glad we came.

Today, I'll take comfort in knowing that my crazy thoughts, feelings, and emotions are not disgusting to God. I will meditate on how He actually wants to be with me - this Creator God - the one who made me - wants to walk through time with me. My goal today will be to take each care, problem, frustration, and every emotion to Him in prayer. And I declare that I will trust the creator of the day - with one more day. Will you join me?

Check out one of my best-selling books - 31 Days in Psalm 31. It's a devotional taken from Psalm 31 (obviously!) - a time when David was hiding in a cave from Saul - even though he'd been anointed the next king. The social isolation of caregiving can certainly make it feel like we live in a cave but God is there with us. And that's what this 31-day devotional is all about, exploring and discovering God in the caves of life. You can get the eBook from my shop at Buy Me A Coffee. Or the print and kindle versions are available in my Amazon Shop.