From Bitter to Better

 This morning, I reread the story of Ruth. I find the book interesting from the aspect of grief, actually. We start with three women, Naomi, Ruth, and Orpah. All three of them are widows. Naomi lost her husband and both of her sons, who were married to Ruth and Orpah. Naomi, her husband, and her two sons had left their homeland due to a severe famine. While in Moab, the two sons married Orpah and Ruth. At some point, the men all died. After some time, Naomi heard that Judah was thriving again, and there were plenty of crops; the famine was over. She decided to go home.

Orpah eventually made the choice to stay in Moab with her family. Ruth, though, chose to go back with Naomi. What dedication, right? Or perhaps it was desperation. However, the story of Ruth demonstrates to us how God can turn our desperate times into generational miracles. 

When Ruth and Naomi returned to the homeland, everyone was so excited to see Naomi. But she was still grieving. She explained that she no longer wanted to be called Naomi, which means grace, beauty, and pleasant. Instead, she wanted to be called Mara, which means bitter and grieved. Perhaps she was trying to communicate that she was not the same woman who had left Judah, as life had taken a couple of soul-jerking turns for her. She acknowledged her grief, her pain, and where she was emotionally. Life would never be the same for her. Yet in her deepest, darkest hours, she was able to help Ruth find a kinsman redeemer who would marry her and care for them.

On one hand, I think, Wow, what a story of how God can bring grace and healing in the midst of pain. On the other hand,  I think but she didn't really get her life back. It's kind of like Job's story, sure the ending was great - but it didn't erase the pain of the past. 

I have to trust that in the middle of my grief (even the living grief of caregiving), God has a bigger, better plan. Even if He rode in on His white horse and miraculously raised my son up and restored his health and his brain -  it wouldn't be the same. I wouldn't be the same. 

Life has a way of changing us. Those changes may stay even when life gets better. Had Naomi chosen to stay bitter, she may not have ever held Ruth's beautiful son in her arms. She may have missed the promise of the future, which was bright, even though it didn't look like the past. Even in our painful journeys, we can continue to look forward. We can resolve to keep trusting God no matter how our circumstances change over time, even if they don't change at all. We don't have to live in bitterness, even when life is bitter. We can choose to embrace His grace, for it is always enough.

Today, I will remind myself that God's grace is always enough for whatever gets put on the plate. His grace won't run out or wear out - it's always enough. I'll give Him the bitter parts of my life and pray that He makes me better as I work on trusting Him for one more day. Will you join me?

Check out my latest release. Command Your Morning is a 31-day devotional that is focused on taking charge of your soul and day in the morning and trusting God that the rest of the day will follow suit! You can get the eBook from my shop at Buy Me A Coffee. Or the print and Kindle versions are now available in my Amazon Shop.