Who can count the times they've found themselves between the proverbial rock and hard spot? Faith has a way of getting us squeezed between the two. We know God is God. We know He hears our prayers and that He has extended His grace, mercy, compassion, and love to us. But it doesn't always feel that way. For me, it's very frustrating when I know what God can do, but don't see Him doing anything. At least, that's how it feels.
Frustrations soon get me tied up in an emotional knot until I'm unable to think clearly anymore. As mad as I am at God's perceived silence, I still continue to talk to Him and pray. That frustrates me more - but I can't think of a better place to run, even if it seems like He's turned a deaf ear. My emotions say He is far away - but faith says He's right here in the storm with me. Oh, the caregiver journey. It's got so many twists and turns, cliffs, and rocks it's easy to find ourselves stuck emotionally between a rock and a hard spot. What to do?
This is where I am today. But now, I know what to do. When we find ourselves between the Rock and a hard spot - run toward the rock!
In Psalm 77, Asaph found himself there too. I'm so glad that I was able to find my feelings laid out in the scripture - it justifies my pain somehow. Asaph uses a few phrases that religion forbids, like:
Will God reject forever?
Will He ever show His favor again?
Has His grace disappeared?
Is His word to all generations done away?
Has God forgotten to be compassionate?
Is He withholding His mercy?
The funny thing is we know the truthful answers to these questions. But the feelings are so real and raw. Asaph goes on to say that even if he can't see God working right now, then he will remind himself of the things God has done in the past. There are some specific times I saw God at work on our behalf. I can rejoice in those victories - even if I feel defeated right now. I'll run from the hard place - to the Rock. David said in Psalm 18, God (Adonai) is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my Rock in whom I find shelter, my shield, the power that saves me, my stronghold. I call on Adonai, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. I'm gonna guess that includes the enemies of doubt, fear, frustration, and confusion.
Today, I will run to the Rock instead of the hard place. I'll follow Asaph's example and remind myself of all the things I KNOW God has done for me over the years. I'll explore that long list of His interventions in life's hardships, and I will rejoice that He is still my rock - even when I don't deserve Him. And I will trust Him to save me from the enemies in my mind as I trust Him for one more day. Will you join me?
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