Daily Devotions for Caregivers

 It's easy to think you did something wrong or are somehow responsible for bad things happening. That's not the case, but many caregivers feel like they don't have the right amount of faith, don't trust God enough, or did something to bring calamity on themselves or their loved ones. I sure felt that way when my son had his wreck. The church didn't help much when they couldn't pray the prayer of faith to raise him up either. Lots of questions, huh? We brought Jeremiah up last week, and the fact that one of our staple verses we like to use, especially when things don't make sense, was written  to the exiles.  Jeremiah 29:11-14 reassured the exiles that God still had a good plan for them, even if they couldn't see it or understand it.  Think about it for a minute, that there were some notable, good people in exile. Daniel was an exile living in the Babylonian captivity. He didn't do  anything to be put in that position. Neither did the three Hebrew chi...

 "In the Sweet By and By" can be found in almost any old hymnal—and maybe new ones, too, I don't know! It's wonderful to have a blissful afterlife to look forward to, isn't it? I'm not making light of it at all. I cannot wait to spend eternity with my Lord! But there are some days when I think I need a little more of Him in my right now.  Galatians 1:3 and 4 says, Grace to you and peace from God the Father and our Lord Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for our sins, that He might deliver us from this present age , according to the will of our God and Father, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen What would deliver us from this present age  even mean? The NLT adds, just like God planned.  From our right now, heaven is a wonderful escape and we all look forward to it! But God planned to rescue our souls from our right now. He planned for us to have peace and grace (verse 3) in our nows. In John 14:1-4, Jesus explained to His disciples that He was "going to p...

  Memories are a wonderful thing. But they can be haunting at times, too. Sometimes, I cherish the good memories I made with my son before his wreck. Other times, I loathe them because of the loss. But if we can look back on our lives and see it as a whole, as a single action, our memories can help us fight the fight of faith today and going forward. In Nehemiah 4, they were working hard to rebuild the walls around Jerusalem. But it made others mad, for no apparent reason other than they just didn't want Jerusalem to be blessed and succeed. They were under attack by an enemy who wanted to bring confusion and fear. Why? Because those are crippling. We would be correct in labeling them silent killers.  But in chapter 4, verse 14, Nehemiah empowered the workers by telling them this: Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, great and awesome, and fight.... Don't be afraid - just remember God. That turns out to be powerful instructions. It's pretty simple, isn't it? Yet,...

Caregivers are far too familiar with depression. It pretty much just comes along with the package. That's not to say that every caregiver is depressed, but I think everyone battles with it at some point or another. There are a lot of emotions that go along with the losses caregivers have to process.  Honestly, I never thought it would be one of my biggest battles. But as people disappeared and the life I had known slowly faded away in life's rearview mirror, it seemed to swallow me whole.  I didn't recognize it at first. Survival has a way of blinding us to much of what is going on around us as we struggle just to breathe one more breath. I don't care how many scriptures we quote or prayers we pray, at some point the caregiver's fog will try to overcome us and suck the life that's left right out of us. One day, I woke up and realized I'd been depressed. I was about to lose all that I had worked to build job-wise. I sat on the side of the bed and told myself,...

 I often joke that my family was so religious that I went to church 9 months before I was even born. That's actually very true! One time when I was a teenager, my mom was dragging me to church on a Sunday night, and I really didn't want to go. She stopped, looked at me, and said, "I don't care if you are 40 years old. If YOU live in MY house, you're going to church." I still wonder why I had to go and they did not, but maybe, just maybe, she saw something God put in my heart way back then. When Sundays, midweek services or revivals rolled around, the question wasn't if  we were going, it was what time are we leaving? Lol. This is no exaggeration! I raised my kids the same way. My heritage is ministry, and I believed it was a family affair. When I packed up and moved to Chicago in July 2008, I started my search for a church immediately. By the time the call came on that cold November 8 morning, I was involved with two churches, even though I was working thr...

  The other day, we talked about precocious faith, having faith "too early!" Before things happen our determination is to trust God. Today, another term I spilled out of my pen into a poem is "ferocious faith." I am starting to believe that caregivers must have ferocious faith. We are staring at perhaps the most difficult situations life can throw at us, yet we are still clinging to Him. So what if it's an act of desperation! We're reaching for Him, leaning toward Him, and choosing to trust Him again each day. That's being ferocious in our faith.  I thought I'd share the poem I wrote last week. It was literally a "spontaneous prayer" I wrote in my journal, "just for fun." After I looked back at it, I saw my own desparate reach for His heart. And maybe even my ultimate goal of "just being okay." Spontaneous Morning Prayer (Just for Fun) Lord, today I need direction Fill me with godly discretion So I know which way to walk...

 Life is sometimes like a jigsaw puzzle, which has many pieces. It takes lots of time and effort to decide where each piece goes and how it fits in with the rest of the puzzle to create a whole (hopefully beautiful) image. But for caregivers, it's often even more complicated. I think it's more like someone put all the pieces in a bag. Shook it up real good, then dumped it out and said, "Good luck, have fun!" Maybe for some of us, it's even worse than that. It's more like someone took 3, 4, or 5 puzzles. They mixed all the pieces together and then separated them back out into piles. Now you're left trying to find a picture with mismatched pieces. Some of them might go together, some probably won't. It's more likely that you don't even have a complete picture. Frustrating? Yes. That's the point. I keep asking myself why I'm so frustrated. Why am I so short-tempered at seemingly silly stuff? More likely than not, it's caregiver burnout...

  Can faith be precocious? As I was writing out my prayer in my journal last week, it came out in a poem, and I used the word "precocious." Maybe I just needed something to rhyme with ferocious. lol. It did. So I thought about it a bit, and I looked up the definition so I wouldn't look too stupid to the world if I decided to share the poem.  A simple definition of precocious might be, earlier than supposed or something happening earlier than expected. So, I do want precocious faith. I want faith that comes early, even before a struggle begins, because that is what is going to carry me through the struggle, ultimately. Our first response should be out of faith, but if I'm honest, and I usually am, it's not always that way. But as I penned, "...and my faith in You always precocious," I stopped to think and check the definition. Once I was sure I hadn't mispoken, I made it my prayer.  Faith can always be first. Having faith doesn't keep things from ...

  Nehemiah has been a study focus for me over the last few weeks. But to study Nehemiah, we have to take a look at Jeremiah. Why? Because Jeremiah is the one who prophesied the Babylonian captivity that Nehemiah experienced. In chapter 25 of Jeremiah, we see the prophecy that since the Children of Israel had been rebellious and stubborn, they would be taken into captivity by Babylon, and they would remain there for 70 years. It also says that their own cities would lie in ruins during the captivity. Jeremiah decided to write a letter to those who had been carried away into captivity. It is in this letter that we find one of the most quoted scriptures of all time. Jeremiah 29:11 is found in the letter written to the captives. God is promising them a future, even though they are living in difficult circumstances that are going to last 70 years, and there's nothing they can do to make it go faster.  In fact, later in verse 28, it says the duration was going to be long. (Not the p...

 Do you ever feel like you are surrounded? Maybe that's not the word we use most, but it can feel like we are pressed on every side. Sometimes, circumstances keep pressing in until life feels like it's a boa constrictor trying to crush the life out of us. The good news is that we have all made it this far, so far! But as life has its ebbs and flows, there are seasons when we feel like it's coming at us from all sides. We are surrounded! That's how I've felt for the last few weeks, and honestly, it's not getting any better. There are so many things to juggle, plan, skip for more important things, and the list goes on...and on...and on... Some days our sanity is about just doing the things (all million of them) that have  to be done. Some aspects of caregiving cannot be skipped or postponed. They have to be done, period. A few things can be put off until tomorrow (which is already full, by the way), some cannot. If we are not careful, it can spiral out of control....

 There are so many pieces that make up our caregiving days. Quite frankly, it's overwhelming, if we even get a second to think about it. A lot is involved in taking care of another whole person, and even what are usually mundane tasks (for "normal" people) become complicated. It's so easy to be distracted by what is going on around us. Even staying on task for the things we have to do can distract us from life. This week, I'm camping in these three chapters in Exodus. There's so much to this story. It's easy to read in a few minutes without grasping the full impact it was having on their lives. Poor Moses has just shifted into a caregiving-type role. I wonder if he sometimes missed the quiet, backside of the desert! All of a sudden, he's leading and caring for hundreds of thousands of cranky, needy people! Poor guy! Here they are facing the Red Sea and being pursued by one of the best armies of their time. They are looking to him for guidance and help....

 Early on in my caregiving journey, I was quick to push the panic button. I pretty much lived in a state of panic and stress. Facing the unknown is difficult, and can lead to panic attacks, for real! Everything is new, there is no normal  to bring balance. It can be rough. As we grow accustomed to the new norms of caregiving life, maybe we don't tend to push the proverbial panic button   as often.  In Exodus 14:10, the Children of Israel have just left the chains of Egypt behind. Literally everything in their lives had changed , much like becoming a caregiver! They can't run home to whatever type of "home" they had in Egypt. There wasn't even any "comfort food" to grab. What, no mac & cheese!! No calling out for pizza, either? They didn't have the choice to binge-watch the latest sitcom or drama. Not that any of that helps, we just tend to run to what we know. All of a sudden, they are facing the Red Sea, and they can hear and see Pharaoh's a...

 Caregiving is not for the weak at heart! No matter what our unique situations encompass, it's rough all the way around. We all have different scenarios, which means we really cannot compare one with another. But we all carry an emotional load. We all have to rely on God. There are other common threads including social isoloation (one degree or another), grief, feelings of loss and a disruption of "normal" living. Our souls can become bruised by the turmoil that comes with the day-to-day. I was working through a few things this morning on emotional and practical levels, trying to come up with some solutions. As a long sigh suprised me by escaping without any forethought, for one moment, I felt lost. My soul bore the weight of the last 16 years as some of it snuck out. I wondered about all my caregiving friends and prayed for our bruised souls. Then, I thought of the phrase in Isaiah 42:3 - A bruised reed He will not break...   What kind of gentleness is needed to not brea...

 One of my latest projects is a devotional for the weary soul.  As I was gathering my list of scriptures to use, I started thinking about how I am that weary soul! Sometimes, caregivers just get tired through and through. There doesn't seem to be a place to stop. To rest. It's just so 24/7. We must be always on duty.  And that can wear us out.  While I was thinking about this yesterday, I thought, I'm just too tired to "hold on." Ever feel that way? I know I need to hold on to God, but what happens during those times when I am just too tired?  I let my thoughts run through some of my Bible heroes, some of those who must have gotten tired, too. I thought of Joseph sitting in the jail cell all those years. Did he ever get tired? Then, I thought about Daniel living most of his life in Babylonian captivity. Did Daniel get tired? I know David got tired, because he let us know in the Psalms that he was weary, tired, and more! I think we are in good company. :-) Then, ...