Daily Devotions for Caregivers

Before my caregiving days I functioned in many roles in the church. As a youth pastor I taught the young people scriptures like Jeremiah 29:11 - that the Lord has good plans for them - for health and a future. Sometimes on the other side of caregiving, or even during life's strongest trials scriptures like this one can become muddled. If God has good plans for me, why is this happening? His intentions for us never  change. My mind goes back to the Children of Israel. God told them in Leviticus 22:33 that He brought them out of Egypt to be their God . And He said in Exodus 34:14 that He is a jealous God. The New Living Translation interpreted this verse to say He is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you.  God's desire to have a relationship with His people has never changed; and is not likely to make a sharp turn over 2000 years later! God performed mighty miracles to bring His children out of Egypt's bondage. But it was not an easy road after that - they ...

Jesus spoke some powerful words in John 14:27. He was instructing His disciples about what to do after His departure. He explained that Holy Spirit would come and help them. I'm not sure the disciples were quite ready to live life without His up-close-and-personal presence. We all enjoy those times when God's presence is almost tangible. It's the times we can't  feel, hear or sense His presence that are the toughest. Jesus offered these words for His disciples and for us: Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. Even today He offers us a peace beyond our understanding. The caregiver's world is oftentimes anything but  peaceful! There are so many  needs...  and so many questions like "How am I going to handle______?" I'm sure you can fill in the blank with any number of things like finances, transportation, or other decisions that sometimes have t...

Long nights are one of the most difficult situations a caregiver has to face. It's 2 AM and your loved one is ill or not sleeping comfortably and you don't know what to do to help them. What a miserable place to be in! It's in those dark hours that I struggle a lot with faith. In those dark, lonely hours there is no one to reach out to and I find myself asking questions like Where are You God? Do You see us? Do You care? For many caregivers, the wee hours of the morning can be the hardest time to wait . Nights in hospitals or just being up with your loved one can lead to sleep deprivation which has a whole host of adverse effects on the body and the mind. We can find ourselves in a perpetual state of waiting on Him. Isaiah 26:8 says we waited for you eagerly.  I'm not sure "eagerly" is a word I could use to describe my manner of waiting sometimes. But then, maybe we can. If I am "waiting eagerly" it would mean that I am waiting in expectancy - kn...

This morning I had a couple of scriptures on my mind as I puttered about and got my tutoring done early. The one from 1 Thessalonians 5:23 is still fresh on my mind: Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely and may your whole body, soul and spirit be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.  There are only about 3 or 4 times when Paul uses the phrase God of peace. He uses it here and in Romans a couple of times. And of course, Isaiah says that He is the Prince of Peace. We have the God of peace  or the Prince of Peace  living right inside of us. Now that hits me as just a little bit funny since the caregiver's daily life can resemble just about anything but peace. I don't know if it's ever not  hectic! I would probably use just about any  word to describe daily activities - except peaceful.  While each caregiver's journey differs, my days are filled with constant activities like laundry, cooking and pureeing foods, strai...

In both letters to the Thessalonians, Paul started out by saying Grace to you and peace  from God our father and Jesus Christ our Lord.  He knew that their lives were being turned upside down by the opposition they were facing so I think he started his letter by speaking peace over them. Like the caregiver, I'm sure they needed an extra amount of peace. Caregiving is not thought of as peaceful - even on our best days when things go "as planned." We face numerous decisions and the difficulty is in making them for someone else. Finding peace is not always easy. My Uncle Calvin's go-to advice was always "follow peace." Even though he's been gone home now for many years - I find myself returning to that nugget when I am faced with decisions, especially troubling ones. Sometimes it's easy to sort things out and determine the most peaceful  solution; other times it just ain't happening! If we as caregivers need  anything - I'd say it's peac...

The Thessalonians lived in turmoil, conflict, tribulation and trials. The caregiver journey can be one which is very trying too. Our days are filled with activities beyond what "normal" families deal with. Many of us have to basically do everything twice; once for our loved one and then for ourselves. This is especially true for those who require total care. It can mean you get a shower, get dressed and eat breakfast; and you have to get another adult showered, dressed and fed as well. And if they have any sort of special diet it means making two separate breakfasts, lunches, suppers and snacks throughout the day. No matter what your caregiving journey looks like - it's not easy. It can be difficult for people to know how to pray for caregivers. What is it that we need? (A break - we all say in unison!*smile*) Physical help is not always feasible even when people care about you and your situation greatly. And it can be very difficult to know how to pray for the caregive...

It can be the day-to-day grind that is so difficult for the caregiver. Even though each day can bring it's own set of "surprises" and circumstances, the caregiver's life just goes on. There is often no relief or end in sight. If we are honest, no matter how positive we choose to be and how hard we remain focused, there are times when it seems overwhelming. Our situation can be constant and unchanging. Some have hope of a "better" day while others quite frankly, do not. Joni Eareckson Tada says that disability is just so daily . It's the same for the caregiver - there isn't always a break. It's not as much about learning how to "take a break" in the middle of the journey - as it is learning how to walk it out. What I mean by walking it out  is how we handle the day-to-day grind. How do we respond when pressure rises in an already pressure-filled situation? (I won't tell how horrible my responses are if you won't! - or maybe I...

Life can bring with it many afflictions - sometimes life just hurts.  And it doesn't need any help from unexpected tragedies or sickness - it's just painful. It is really up to us how we choose to respond to pain life deals out. And don't you hate it when someone tells you it's a character building  experience? What experience is not  a character builder? In each circumstance we face we are staring down a choice - how are we going to handle this ? Are we going to fall apart? Run crying to a friend? Give up and quit? Shut down our emotions? You may list anything else here that is your MO (Mode of Operation)! I'm not saying that these are right - or wrong - just typical responses when we don't know how to deal with situations. But no matter what - eventually we have to work through it and live. Caregivers are no different. We don't get a separate instruction manual than the rest of the world! Our choices are the same as everyone else's and our decisions ...

Do you ever wonder why life can't be easier? Why can't things go smoother? Life can get so hectic - and do so suddenly with no warning at all. I'm sure you've had those days. You know - things are rocking along pretty good and Bam! Out of nowhere it's helter-skelter. Now it's anything but smooth sailing. And since the caregiver lives on the edge - it really doesn't take much, does it? What do you do when life makes a sudden change? How do you handle it when the day is going along smoothly and the aide doesn't show, you realize you're out of wipes (that's serious y'all!) or you didn't get the right formula? Usually, the aide shows up fine as long as you don't plan anything, right? But decide you're going to run to the store for some necessities like coffee or toilet paper and she won't show up - guaranteed. We really do have to just laugh about it (later though because when it happens it's usually traumatic!). Usually, ...

Psalm 27 has been a long time favorite of mine and as I was reading it recently there were a few things that really stuck out to me. Verse 5 really rings true for me today: In the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion.  I really like that for two reasons - the first one is that the psalmist says "in the time of trouble." This indicates that he experienced times of difficulty in his own life. It doesn't say "since God got me out of trouble" or "helped me avoid trouble," it says IN the time of trouble. There's not always a quick escape! The second thing that sticks out to me is that during troublesome times- He hides me at His house.  I really like that. He does not cast me aside or treat me like I am unworthy or meaningless - but He puts me up in His own house when I am experiencing trouble. David indicates that he works hard to stay in God's house. His desire was to be in the Lord's presence and dwelling constantly with Him s...

In yesterday's blog we talked about "let." It's a little word, with a huge impact. Today we'll look at the very next verse in Colossians 3. Verse 16 says to Let the word of Christ dwell within you.... Once again, the word "let" is synonymous with allow. Paul is urging the young Christian church to allow God's word to put down deep roots into their hearts. He's talking about a lot more than just a simple surface relationship - Allow His word to indwell you. It's easy for circumstances to crowd out our entire belief system if we do not guard our hearts carefully, When my son was injured in an automobile accident - the happenings that followed for months shook my faith to its core. That's totally natural; but I was faced with a choice. Am I going to continue to trust God? Situations will have impacts on us, but it's up to us what we choose to hold on to. In my own personal struggle there were times when my greatest frustration was th...

The caregiver's life can feel anything but peaceful. There are just so many things that have to be done for your loved one every day. For me, my son is not capable of doing anything for himself. That means that I am responsible for doing everything from getting him bathed, dressed, up in the chair, to making sure he is fed. That's all just the start of the day. One way to gain an understanding of what the caregiver does is to think about all those basic things you do each day -eating, bathing, dressing, brushing your teeth, washing your face, going for a walk, etc. But because you are doing for another - you are doubling all of those efforts. That coupled with having to fight with insurance companies, various health providers and aids, can all lead to very not-so-peaceful days. My Uncle Calvin had a saying that he always used when someone was facing any type of decision or situation - follow peace.  Sounds simple, but in real life applications it can be confusing and difficul...

Caregiviving can mean some very long nights; sometimes it seems like they won't ever end! That's how I felt this morning as I went in my son's room after a long night of listening to him cough. It's not that parents aren't used to it - it's just that you can get so tired, so weary. I had already started his breathing treatment just a little after 5, made my coffee and was getting his bolus together. While trying to decide what medicine to try to see if it would make him feel better, and trying to decide if we need to make yet another trip to the ER, I heard myself utter this simple prayer: Lord, today I really need wisdom...and your peace...and my coffee of course! It's difficult when you are making choices that affect another person's life and well being and sometimes it weighs on you heavily. Not only can He give His wisdom and offer our hearts His peace - He can make sure the coffee doesn't run out! (lol) This has been a long year with lots an...

In Philippians, Paul said that he had learned to be content in whatever state he found himself in - whether that was in a state of abundance, or a state of lacking. Faithers tend to ignore this verse unless they are misquoting it to make a point. How does it interpret into our daily lives, especially for the caregiver? Are we supposed to be content with the fact that our loved one is hurting? Or should we be content that they can no longer care for themselves? What does it mean to be content? First of all, Paul wasn't giving a command to be content. It was not meant as "instruction." He was making a statement about his own life and how he had found that he was content - or at peace with himself and God no matter what life threw his way. It seems in this part of this short book he is expressing gratitude to the Philippian church for once again having compassion on his needs and offering help. He said it nicely but in verse 10 he basically ( in my loose interpretation) sa...

After talking about encouragement yesterday I studied it a little further. This morning's plan was to share Romans 15:5 which says: Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus. (NASB) First of all, it's pretty amazing that He just gives us encouragement. There's no stipulation - when you pray, if you ask, if you follow all the rules in the book; it just says He gives patience and encouragement. As a caregiver this is good to know, because if I feel that I am lacking in persevering or encouragement I know I can go to Him and ask Him to help me make it another day... and He will.   As I was meditating on this particular scripture I stopped on the phrase the God who gives and did a quick search. What I found was pretty amazing. He really gives us a lot! Here's a list of some of the scriptures that I found by searching the God who gives - these are only the NASB version too - if yo...

It can be way too easy to let the pain of each day have our focus; but it does not have to be that way. Starting in the morning we can begin to shift our thoughts to Him and away from our circumstances. I'm not trying to minimize the pain that a day brings as for many caregivers, as well as those who are being cared for because of chronic or serious conditions, the pain of the circumstance can be almost unbearable. Quite honestly, some days we do not have the energy to let pain have our attention as we spend the day taking care of the needs of our loved one. But each day hurts. If we are not careful our thoughts will major on things that we are missing instead of what we have - life. And not just life - but life in Him. We can chose to celebrate that life in Him from any circumstance. As believers we understand the concept of hiding in Him. Psalm 91 talks about hiding in the secret place  of the Most High; and Psalm 46:1 speaks of the Lord being a very present help in trouble a...

After yesterday's thoughts about how the Lord gives us patience, hope, peace and encouragement I looked at a few more scriptures along that line. (We may stay on this thought for awhile!) I ended up in John 14:27 where Jesus tells us I am leaving you with a gift; peace of mind and heart . And the peace I give isn't like the peace the world gives, so don't be troubled or afraid. (NLT) In this world today I am not sure we are aware of what it really feels to have peace of mind and heart. The world is in turmoil all around us and our lives as caregivers can be full of it. We can get up in the morning, have ourselves all together (emotions included) and something will occur to try and remove our peace. Perhaps an aide does not show up or there's a confrontation with a health provider who really does not want to do their job (or so it seems), or maybe it's just that our loved one is not having the best day - which means we do not either. But all of a sudden it can be ...

One of my Facebook friends posted Psalm 18:2 on their wall early this morning so I pulled out my Bible with my morning cup of coffee and read through this familiar and favorite passage. I read over it a couple of times and then I just meditated on the first couple of verses. As I was reading and rereading and meditating my thoughts began to be focused on how He could be my rock and my fortress. David was on the battlefield when then was written and I am sure there were many times he crawled up into a rocky area and sought refuge and safety. Sometimes the life of a caregiver can parallel a battlefield as we are many times the only advocate our loved one has. It's a shame but lots of times I find myself battling for things that are included in his care plan; for the things and care my son is supposed to get anyway. God is indeed our rock during those times. But a fortress is a little bit different. When David is referring to a rock it could be interpreted a cave, or a solid pl...

Did you ever turn around in the middle of the afternoon and wonder where the day has gone so fast? When everything works like it should, a day can be hectic. Supplies come in, meals get delivered, aides actually show up; the front door just keeps swinging some days. It's a good thing, but it can sure be like a whirlwind sometimes, especially if you factor in all the other daily caregiving that is not optional. If we are not careful a day can get away from us and we are left scratching our heads wondering which way it went. Yesterday was like that around here and so when I found Psalm 131:2 this morning during my morning devotions it brought a quiet in my soul that was much needed. The psalmist said, But I have stilled and quieted myself just as a small child is quiet with his mother... And then he goes on in the last verse to say his hope is in the Lord. What stood out to me here was that the psalmist said he quieted himself ...he quieted his own soul before the Lord by remind...

It's funny how a tiny ray of hope can change everything. Proverbs 13:12 says that when hope is deferred  or delayed it makes the heart sick. That's pretty serious because when we get to the point that our heart is sick, our soul is not well then we are in a troubled condition. Personally, I can say that when those dark times swing around and I begin to lose hope it makes it very difficult for me to deal with everyday stuff. I call it tired from the inside out. Not only is it a terrible place to be - it's very difficult to try to get out of as well. But let just a tiny ray of hope shine into a situation that's been darkened by life - and Bam! Everything changes. Romans 15:13 is a prayer that the apostle Paul is sending out for the Christians in Rome. He prays that the God of hope will keep them in peace and that He will make them overflow with hope through Holy Spirit's power. Hope is one of the three things that will endure according to 1 Corinthians 13:13.  And...