Posts

Just a Slave Boy

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 I love the story of Daniel and this morning during my daily devotions, I read through the first few chapters. I am awed by their dedication and commitment to God even though they became captives in a foreign land. We see God gives them wisdom that far excelled the pagan magicians and wizards in the land. They were even made rulers over all of Babylon. (Daniel 2:48-49) Moving ahead to Daniel 6, the jealous princes were trying to destroy Daniel. They devised a wicked plot and tricked the king into making a decree. When they came back to report to the king that Daniel had disobeyed by praying to God, they referred to him as "one of the captives from Judah." Never mind that he was the ruler of all the provinces of Babylon, right? Sometimes in life, we encounter people who refuse to see us for who we are. As a caregiver, many times people only  see us as a caregiver. They don't see us as Bible teachers, preachers, ministers, writers, or anything else. It's like how David...

Shattered Dreams

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 Did you have dreams before caregiving? For many of you who are caring for elderly parents, maybe you had high hopes for retirement. For those who provide care for special needs adults, the dreams may have looked a bit different, but they existed. When my son was injured in the accident, I was headed to the mission field to fulfill my life-long dream. Broken and shattered dreams can be difficult to deal with. You can move on, but you can't always pick up those pieces without always wondering, what if. I'm like - what are we supposed to do with those unfulfilled dreams? I question if they were my own - or if God orchestrated them. Either way - there's only one thing to do with them. Give them to Him. My mind goes to some of our popular Bible heroes. I think of Joseph who had the dreams about his family bowing down to him. Maybe he didn't quite understand them. But I'm certain that they didn't seem to be panning out as he spent years sitting in a dungeon-like cell...

In Focus

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This morning I was thinking about some of the people in the Bible who went through rough times. Honestly, it's those who endured hard places that earn the respect of believers, right? We never look at someone Bible character or not and think oh, they have never faced any difficulties - I respect them so much.   lol. It's the fact that people walk through life's stuff with their faith intact that earns our admiration and respect. I like to read biographies and autobiographies - but it's the things the main character endures that make the story inspirational and interesting. I thought back about David and how when Samuel the prophet came to anoint "one of Jesse's sons" as king - no one remembered to go get David from tending the sheep. He had the choice of focusing on rejection - but he didn't make that his focus. Then, I thought about Daniel, not just in the lion's den. He was taken captive as a young lad and lived nearly his entire life as a slave ...

No Room in the Inn

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 Do you ever just feel out of step with the rest of the world? I'm not really sure what everyone uses to measure "normal" but I think our caregiving lives don't fit the mold. :-) Most of the time, I'm good with it - I know we walk a very different walk. However, I also know that the baby boomer generation is busy taking care of our parents, so it's a bigger thing than most think. Honestly, I'm not sure about everyone else - but I am sure about me. And I feel out of step with pretty much the rest of the world. When you are a caregiver: Simple things are not simple. Doable things are not doable. Basic activities of life are more complicated. I know you understand. In one way, the pandemic has been a huge help. It's so much easier to order groceries and household supplies now. I am thankful for that since just going to the store can be a huge deal. One cough from my son and the trip is off! lol (Yes, I'm a bit overprotective like that!) With the holid...

The Final Transition: A Caregiver’s Guide to Death

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  It’s impossible to predict the exact moment of death, but there are signs that the end is looming just around the corner. From a loss of appetite to labored breathing, most people exhibit a few behaviors that indicate the time to say goodbye is now. As difficult as it is to consider, as a caregiver, you must learn to recognize the portents of passing and help make the final transition as reassuring as possible for both you and your loved one. Here are some tips to help prepare you for this difficult but natural transition.   Is the end near?   One of the first signs the body is shutting down is a loss of appetite, according to senior caregiving specialists at Caring.com. This may be accompanied by excessive fatigue and increased physical weakness. A dying person may be unable to change their position in the bed. Disorientation and labored breathing are also common; listen for Cheyne-Stokes respirations , which is abnormal breathing characterized by increasingly d...

Overlooked

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  As caregivers, we have a lot in common. But it's impossible to evenly compare our situations. Among caregivers, circumstances can vary greatly and no two situations are the same, even though they may be somewhat similar. Some of us care for elderly parents, others for our children. You may provide care for a sibling, an aunt, or someone else you care for deeply.  Some of our loved ones are total care, others can do a few things on their own. Some of us live in the home with our loved ones, others are long-distance caregivers. Any way you slice it, we are providing care for someone we value.  One thing we may share though is feelings of being overlooked. It can be hard to find where we fit in our communities, our families, even our churches. Our lives look much different when compared to the rest of the world and we experience different levels of "normal" in our day-to-day. We adjust to the new normals of caregiving, though, don't we? But we can't really expect o...

In the Womb

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 One of the things I deal with as a caregiver is being alone. This becomes emotionally complicated by so many weird little details. For instance, I almost  had a date this weekend! (For real.) But they canceled because they got too busy. I was a little bit relieved, to be honest. But I'd already gone to the expense and effort of hiring a sitter. I'll probably take myself out! lol But it left me feeling emotionally drained and alone. I took it a lot harder than I thought. Feelings of aloneness swept over me and I thought about how even my old friends don't want to hang out with me. You see, time is my love language. So the fact that my friend "didn't have time" spoke volumes to me about how unimportant I was in the scheme of things.  As I sorted through my emotions, a familiar scripture came to mind. It's in Psalm 139. David says  You watched me form in the womb.  But It was like I could see God watching over a baby forming in the womb. I watched you as you...