Posts

In Focus

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This morning I was thinking about some of the people in the Bible who went through rough times. Honestly, it's those who endured hard places that earn the respect of believers, right? We never look at someone Bible character or not and think oh, they have never faced any difficulties - I respect them so much.   lol. It's the fact that people walk through life's stuff with their faith intact that earns our admiration and respect. I like to read biographies and autobiographies - but it's the things the main character endures that make the story inspirational and interesting. I thought back about David and how when Samuel the prophet came to anoint "one of Jesse's sons" as king - no one remembered to go get David from tending the sheep. He had the choice of focusing on rejection - but he didn't make that his focus. Then, I thought about Daniel, not just in the lion's den. He was taken captive as a young lad and lived nearly his entire life as a slave ...

No Room in the Inn

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 Do you ever just feel out of step with the rest of the world? I'm not really sure what everyone uses to measure "normal" but I think our caregiving lives don't fit the mold. :-) Most of the time, I'm good with it - I know we walk a very different walk. However, I also know that the baby boomer generation is busy taking care of our parents, so it's a bigger thing than most think. Honestly, I'm not sure about everyone else - but I am sure about me. And I feel out of step with pretty much the rest of the world. When you are a caregiver: Simple things are not simple. Doable things are not doable. Basic activities of life are more complicated. I know you understand. In one way, the pandemic has been a huge help. It's so much easier to order groceries and household supplies now. I am thankful for that since just going to the store can be a huge deal. One cough from my son and the trip is off! lol (Yes, I'm a bit overprotective like that!) With the holid...

The Final Transition: A Caregiver’s Guide to Death

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  It’s impossible to predict the exact moment of death, but there are signs that the end is looming just around the corner. From a loss of appetite to labored breathing, most people exhibit a few behaviors that indicate the time to say goodbye is now. As difficult as it is to consider, as a caregiver, you must learn to recognize the portents of passing and help make the final transition as reassuring as possible for both you and your loved one. Here are some tips to help prepare you for this difficult but natural transition.   Is the end near?   One of the first signs the body is shutting down is a loss of appetite, according to senior caregiving specialists at Caring.com. This may be accompanied by excessive fatigue and increased physical weakness. A dying person may be unable to change their position in the bed. Disorientation and labored breathing are also common; listen for Cheyne-Stokes respirations , which is abnormal breathing characterized by increasingly d...

Overlooked

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  As caregivers, we have a lot in common. But it's impossible to evenly compare our situations. Among caregivers, circumstances can vary greatly and no two situations are the same, even though they may be somewhat similar. Some of us care for elderly parents, others for our children. You may provide care for a sibling, an aunt, or someone else you care for deeply.  Some of our loved ones are total care, others can do a few things on their own. Some of us live in the home with our loved ones, others are long-distance caregivers. Any way you slice it, we are providing care for someone we value.  One thing we may share though is feelings of being overlooked. It can be hard to find where we fit in our communities, our families, even our churches. Our lives look much different when compared to the rest of the world and we experience different levels of "normal" in our day-to-day. We adjust to the new normals of caregiving, though, don't we? But we can't really expect o...

In the Womb

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 One of the things I deal with as a caregiver is being alone. This becomes emotionally complicated by so many weird little details. For instance, I almost  had a date this weekend! (For real.) But they canceled because they got too busy. I was a little bit relieved, to be honest. But I'd already gone to the expense and effort of hiring a sitter. I'll probably take myself out! lol But it left me feeling emotionally drained and alone. I took it a lot harder than I thought. Feelings of aloneness swept over me and I thought about how even my old friends don't want to hang out with me. You see, time is my love language. So the fact that my friend "didn't have time" spoke volumes to me about how unimportant I was in the scheme of things.  As I sorted through my emotions, a familiar scripture came to mind. It's in Psalm 139. David says  You watched me form in the womb.  But It was like I could see God watching over a baby forming in the womb. I watched you as you...

All the Elements

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 This morning in my devotions I found myself in Psalm 57. It's a passage very familiar to me and dear to my heart. When I was sick with a mystery illness  back in 1986-7, I read this psalm over and over as I literally held onto it for dear life. It's got all the elements: prayer, praise, despair, faith, and declarations. This particular psalm is written by David, the same David who ran toward Goliath and declared that God would deliver the giant into his hands that very day. But now, he's running from a mad man, Saul. David is hiding in a cave. That's a far cry from chasing down a giant, right? He's open and honest about his distress. In verses four and six he says,  I am surrounded! My enemies have set a trap for me! I am weary. Man, can I relate to that! Many times I feel surrounded by enemies like fear and doubt. It takes a lot of courage and strength to just keep putting one foot in front of the other. The cool thing about David though, is that he always brings ...

How Long?

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Do you ever feel like you've reached the end of what you can do? It may stem from pure exhaustion, but it feels like it's a "that's it" moment. It feels like God doesn't hear. It feels like He has moved away. There are just those times of overwhelm. Or maybe it's just me. I do think that the psalmist was feeling these types of emotions when he penned Psalm 13. It's not clear what type(s) of circumstances David was facing, but his emotions are clear. His soul is crying out for God to intervene. In the New Living Translation, Psalm 13 reads this way: O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? Turn and answer me, O Lord my God! Restore the light to my eyes, or I will die. Don't let my enemies gloat, saying, "We have defeated him!" Don't let them rejoice at my downfall. B...