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The Unexpected

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Well, we ended up spending this last week in the hospital. As caregivers, we can be forced to deal with the unexpected  a lot, right? No matter how organized we are, how detailed we get, or how carefully we plan - we just never know what a day will bring. Sometimes we trust Him as we fly by the seat of our pants and hold on to the proverbial last strand of the rope. Then things settle back down and we begin to see how He orchestrated everything for our good. But it's not always easy to see it when we are in  it. Afterward, we see how He sustained us, helped us, and even carried us. That's the beauty of hindsight, right? I don't know how long you've been on your caregiving journey, but I'm working on 14 years now. I must say as I look over this last decade and a half, I see God's sustaining power. Through the times I felt like I couldn't make it - to the times when I thought I had  made it - but soon fell apart at His feet once again - He's been there all...

Voided Warranty

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This morning I was thinking about how we can feel the effect of God's peace, love, grace, and mercy even if we don't see Him. I shared in my Facebook live devotion this morning about being able to see the sun's effect without actually being able to see the sun. (See video below!) While I was talking about that I had this brief thought that has been my meditation since I finished the devotion. I said that there's no way to void God's "warranty." Ever buy something and if you open it wrongly or do something they deem "wrong" it will void the warranty and the company will no longer cover or service it? I'm so thankful that God isn't like that. His peace, grace, mercy, love, and everything else can't be "voided" by our negligent or purposeful actions. He doesn't take any of these or His many other attributes and blessings back because of our actions. We may choose to ignore His peace (like I do sometimes when I am mad at lif...

Where is "HERE"?

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Do you ever just assess your life? As caregivers, we can have such a sense of loss. Caregiving puts so many demands on us. Many have to change occupations or quit their jobs altogether to have the time to invest in caring for a loved one. We may grieve the loss of a lifestyle we enjoyed before caregiving. Sometimes, we feel the loss of freedom as we may not be able to just jump and run when we want to or hang out with friends freely. We may live with grief that stems from losing a person - while they are still here. This is the case with my son and with caregivers of loved ones with dementia. The sense of loss and feelings of grief can come from so many different areas in our lives, that they are often overlooked, or at best difficult to identify. After I did this morning's Facebook Live devotional "Peace Out!", I took my own personal assessment. (See video below!) I walked through my apartment and every few steps, I told myself "God is right here!" I'd take...

I KNOW I'm Not Alone - Why do I Feel That Way?

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 Do you ever feel alone? Caregiving has a way of isolating you and sometimes even in a crowd you can feel alone. Since I've become my son's aide, I feel more alone than ever. I know I am on the phone with people or in zoom meetings almost every day. But I still feel so very alone. I remind myself that God is with me - a truth I hold on to. But it's so hard to not feel totally alone when you make all the decisions, do all the caregiving tasks, and can't find sitters for big events you really don't want to miss. I know that He said He'd be with me to the end. He also said He'd never leave or forsake us, but since God doesn't wear skin, it can feel like He's a million miles away from my day-to-day reality, no matter how much my heart holds to the truth that He is near. Ah! The age-old battle between the mind and the spirit. I started mentally walking through some Bible stories to find a character who may have felt very alone, yet God was with him. I lan...

Under is Not All Bad

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  When we think of being under something it's usually in a bad connotation. We feel under the weather  or we are under a heavy burden.  But this weekend, I discovered that being under isn't all bad! We had some bad storms roll through. The tornadic activity was nowhere near me but in the same county. Since there was a tornado warning in the county, the tornado sirens were blaring. I ran outside to see if I could capture a photo of anything interesting from this side. What I found was a huge feeder cloud looming overhead. I snapped a photo but it just did not compare. I took several photos and came back to the house to look at them. They seemed to lack something. It took me a few minutes to figure out what was missing. A picture just couldn't capture the feeling of being under  that huge cloud formation. Of course, my mind went to the scriptures. Psalm 91 talks about hiding under the shadow  of the Almighty. In Psalm 57, the psalmist declares he will stay under t...

Not Forgotten

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  It's so easy to feel insignificant, ignored, and shoved to the side of life. People don't always mean to be mean, but they often don't know what to do with "us." lol. Simple things become complicated. Like, which Sunday School class do I belong in? Should I go with Chris? Leave him alone in a class and try to find my own? Or do I even try to go since it'll be such a mess? Let's not even talk about trying to find a way to use a public restroom. Do I take my adult son with me to the women's or do I go to the men's? (That's a no.) For caregivers, simple daily tasks can become quite difficult. Others just don't understand and so it can be easy to begin to feel less-than and insignificant. These are some of the thoughts I let my mind wander down this morning after reading John 4 again. This chapter contains the familiar story of the Woman at the Well. We don't even know her name. We know very little about her past, except that she's be...

Full Of It

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  This morning during my private devotions, I started studying 1 John to prepare for an upcoming live Zoom Bible study I'm hosting. (Let me know if you'd like a link to join!) I John is very connected to the gospel of John and I found myself reading the first chapter of this gospel over and over. It amazes me and pretty much blows my mind how God has orchestrated all this. Before He said, "Let there be light" He had already done everything. He'd already prepared the way for us to get back to Him, even before the fall happened in time. Jesus was crucified and raised to sit on the throne. Our sins were already forgiven before we ever even committed them. (We just need to accept His forgiveness.)  So I'm reading through John chapter one with my mouth wide open in awe! My mind is running around crazy just thinking about all the wonderous works of God. The Word of God - His very breath become flesh and walked among man for a brief 33 years. In verse 14, it says He ...