The Unexpected

Well, we ended up spending this last week in the hospital. As caregivers, we can be forced to deal with the unexpected a lot, right? No matter how organized we are, how detailed we get, or how carefully we plan - we just never know what a day will bring. Sometimes we trust Him as we fly by the seat of our pants and hold on to the proverbial last strand of the rope. Then things settle back down and we begin to see how He orchestrated everything for our good. But it's not always easy to see it when we are in it.

Afterward, we see how He sustained us, helped us, and even carried us. That's the beauty of hindsight, right? I don't know how long you've been on your caregiving journey, but I'm working on 14 years now. I must say as I look over this last decade and a half, I see God's sustaining power. Through the times I felt like I couldn't make it - to the times when I thought I had made it - but soon fell apart at His feet once again - He's been there all along. 

He never tells us to "get it together" before we come to Him. Instead, He gives us an open invitation to bring our hearts, minds, emotions, and brokenness to Him time after time. He even waits for us to come to Him. Isaiah 30:18 says The Lord waits to be gracious to YOU! He's there for the expected and the unexpected. He never says that He didn't see something coming, can't deal with it, or doesn't know what to do with our situations or us. He just waits until we realize we need His grace to make it one more day.

Today, I'm going to run to Him - since He's waiting for me and all. (smile) I will remind myself that He's closer than a breath away whether I feel it or not. He is longing to pour out His grace to us, in us, and through us. I'm guessing the amount of grace He can lavish on us is proportionate to our need for Him. Today, I need Him a whole lot! How about you? I'm starting to think that the best place to be is in that place of awareness when we realize our great need for Him to work in our lives. That place where we wait for Him and there is no other option. Today, I know I need Him and I'm waiting on Him - will you join me?

                                                                                                                                           

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Voided Warranty

This morning I was thinking about how we can feel the effect of God's peace, love, grace, and mercy even if we don't see Him. I shared in my Facebook live devotion this morning about being able to see the sun's effect without actually being able to see the sun. (See video below!) While I was talking about that I had this brief thought that has been my meditation since I finished the devotion.

I said that there's no way to void God's "warranty." Ever buy something and if you open it wrongly or do something they deem "wrong" it will void the warranty and the company will no longer cover or service it? I'm so thankful that God isn't like that. His peace, grace, mercy, love, and everything else can't be "voided" by our negligent or purposeful actions. He doesn't take any of these or His many other attributes and blessings back because of our actions. We may choose to ignore His peace (like I do sometimes when I am mad at life), but it's still right there when we need it. It's still available for us to apply to our hearts and lives. He won't take it back even if we choose to step outside of it. We can't "void" its warranty. 

This is one of the things I talk about a lot in our caregiver devotions. Our lives don't get too complicated or ugly for Him to take back any of His promises. His grace doesn't diminish and His peace won't run out even though we keep them running full throttle with our day-to-day lives as caregivers. He never gets tired of us - and He encourages us to keep running to Him - rather than running away from Him.

We can't surprise Him or startle Him with our crazy responses, questions, or situations. I love that. He won't disqualify us for His grace, mercy, or peace. Actually, He lavishes it on us even more because He knows we need it. He told Paul that His grace was sufficient. Since we know that He is enough for all we need or desire - we can trust that His grace is enough to carry us through and we will not do anything to void His warranty! It's just up to us to continue to trust in Him as we navigate through our days caring for our loved ones.

Today, I will remind myself that His grace is enough to sustain me, help me, carry me when needed. My meditations will be on how He is so consistently grace-full, mercy-full, and patient with me. He even puts up with my tirades and fits. But He still chooses to be there for me and with me. I'll remind myself that His grace, love, mercy, and peace won't ever expire and I'm not capable of wearing them out, using them up, or voiding their warranties! Then, I will trust Him for today - will you join me?

Where is "HERE"?

Do you ever just assess your life? As caregivers, we can have such a sense of loss. Caregiving puts so many demands on us. Many have to change occupations or quit their jobs altogether to have the time to invest in caring for a loved one. We may grieve the loss of a lifestyle we enjoyed before caregiving. Sometimes, we feel the loss of freedom as we may not be able to just jump and run when we want to or hang out with friends freely. We may live with grief that stems from losing a person - while they are still here. This is the case with my son and with caregivers of loved ones with dementia. The sense of loss and feelings of grief can come from so many different areas in our lives, that they are often overlooked, or at best difficult to identify.

After I did this morning's Facebook Live devotional "Peace Out!", I took my own personal assessment. (See video below!) I walked through my apartment and every few steps, I told myself "God is right here!" I'd take a few steps or go to another room and say, "You are here!" I did this all around my apartment - mostly to remind myself that He is here - wherever "here" is! 

Whether we are with family, at the hospital, in a nursing home, or right here in our comfy apartment, God is in our HERE! It helps me keep my attitude straight for the day when I realize that God doesn't put a limitation on where He'll meet with us. He came to Hagar two times in her time of need. Jesus went through Samaria, the Jews' "other side of the tracks" to meet with the Samaritan woman who doesn't even have a name! He didn't need a drink of water - He went there for her! 

No matter what our HERE looks like, He is there! He is HERE! 

Today, I will remind myself that God is in my here - He's been in every "here" so far and He's not changing now! I'll meditate on the truth that He simply cannot leave us and He won't leave us now. I'll be thankful that He is right here with me and my son no matter what turns this day may take - He won't abandon. I'll trust Him to be "here" today - will you join me in your "here"?

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I KNOW I'm Not Alone - Why do I Feel That Way?

 Do you ever feel alone? Caregiving has a way of isolating you and sometimes even in a crowd you can feel alone. Since I've become my son's aide, I feel more alone than ever. I know I am on the phone with people or in zoom meetings almost every day. But I still feel so very alone.

I remind myself that God is with me - a truth I hold on to. But it's so hard to not feel totally alone when you make all the decisions, do all the caregiving tasks, and can't find sitters for big events you really don't want to miss. I know that He said He'd be with me to the end. He also said He'd never leave or forsake us, but since God doesn't wear skin, it can feel like He's a million miles away from my day-to-day reality, no matter how much my heart holds to the truth that He is near.

Ah! The age-old battle between the mind and the spirit.

I started mentally walking through some Bible stories to find a character who may have felt very alone, yet God was with him. I landed on David. There he stood facing a giant, a foe of epic proportions like none other he'd ever faced. It was just him and Goliath. Was David alone? Nope. But certainly, he must have felt that way, right?

Saul tried to give David his armor and wasn't confident in sending "the kid" out to the battlefield. David had been talking among the ranks and asking soldiers what the prize was for defeating the giant. He didn't seem to ever think about any other scenarios - other than victory. His own brother tried to belittle him by asking where are those few little sheep you are supposed to be taking care of? This brother surely had seen Samuel anoint David as king, but refused to accept it and instead tried to make sure David knew he was the least, the youngest, the most unimportant piece in life's puzzle. So even though David had all of Saul's army present and "behind" him, he faced Goliath all alone. And that's where God showed up.

David must have looked and felt so small standing there in front of Goliath. He was likely shorter than the giant's staff. But David had told Saul that God had delivered him from the lion and the bear and he had no doubt God would deliver him from the giant too. So there stood little David all alone. Facing the giant and an army of frightened soldiers behind him - but not with him. But he trusted God and prevailed.

I propose today that even though we may feel sandwiched between a giant and our past God is with us on that field. We may hear the naysayers. We may not have any physical help. But God is showing up for us again and again. As caregivers, we face more than just one giant every single day. As a matter of fact, sometimes the smallest parts of life become huge giants because of our situations. But we can face them all in the name of the Lord.

Today, I will remind myself that I am not alone - no matter how alone I feel. I will tell myself to grab hold of those proverbial bootstraps and give it one more go. My thoughts will be directed toward the truth that God is with us - we never face the giants alone. I know I can trust Him to empower me to take them out one by one. So, I will trust Him with the giants of today. Will you join me?

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Check out my bookstores. I have eBook devotionals, Bible study guides, poetry, and more in my Dove's Fire Ministries bookstore. My Amazon bookshelf has a couple of those in print or on Kindle. My devotional 31 Days in Psalm 31 is all about seeking God from the cave! Check it out!

Under is Not All Bad

 

When we think of being under something it's usually in a bad connotation. We feel under the weather or we are under a heavy burden. But this weekend, I discovered that being under isn't all bad! We had some bad storms roll through. The tornadic activity was nowhere near me but in the same county. Since there was a tornado warning in the county, the tornado sirens were blaring. I ran outside to see if I could capture a photo of anything interesting from this side.

What I found was a huge feeder cloud looming overhead. I snapped a photo but it just did not compare. I took several photos and came back to the house to look at them. They seemed to lack something. It took me a few minutes to figure out what was missing. A picture just couldn't capture the feeling of being under that huge cloud formation.

Of course, my mind went to the scriptures. Psalm 91 talks about hiding under the shadow of the Almighty. In Psalm 57, the psalmist declares he will stay under the shadow of God's protection until the calamities were passed. Until we get under His protective wings, we just won't get it! 

What good is a refuge if we don't run to it? What good is a fortress if we don't hunker down for protection? God is our refuge - He is our strength - but we must hide in Him and run to Him first. Until we get under Him - we won't have a sense of His protection, power, majesty, and strength.

Today, I will purposefully hide my heart in His. I'll seek His protection, peace, and comfort. I'll remind myself that I need to let Him carry me when I feel like I cannot take one more step. I'll remind myself that it's okay (and preferred) to run to Him before I find myself in overwhelm mode. He's right there waiting for us - will you join me?

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Not Forgotten

 

It's so easy to feel insignificant, ignored, and shoved to the side of life. People don't always mean to be mean, but they often don't know what to do with "us." lol. Simple things become complicated. Like, which Sunday School class do I belong in? Should I go with Chris? Leave him alone in a class and try to find my own? Or do I even try to go since it'll be such a mess? Let's not even talk about trying to find a way to use a public restroom. Do I take my adult son with me to the women's or do I go to the men's? (That's a no.)

For caregivers, simple daily tasks can become quite difficult. Others just don't understand and so it can be easy to begin to feel less-than and insignificant. These are some of the thoughts I let my mind wander down this morning after reading John 4 again. This chapter contains the familiar story of the Woman at the Well. We don't even know her name.

We know very little about her past, except that she's been married five times and now she's living with a man. We know nothing of her future. Yet, Jesus went way out of His way to meet with her at the well that day. He met with a woman (strike one), in Samaria (strike two). And He even told her straight up that He was the Messiah. wow. She wasn't going to slay a giant, survive a burning fiery furnace, or get out of a lion's den. There's no glowing superhuman story. Just a woman at a well. Insignificant? Yet worth His time.

The earth is in the Milky Way Galaxy. But it's only one of many galaxies out there. We can easily feel so insignificant just as humans on this sole little planet swirling around with 8 other planets, lots of stars, moons, and the sun. But to think there are numerous other galaxies makes us seem less significant in the grand scheme of things. Yet - Jesus left His peace HERE. (John 14:27) God loves US. God walks through time with us - He shared His peace, love, wisdom, and strength with us. He came for US. 

Today, I will remind myself that I am surrounded by His greatness. In my small existence, God lives big in me. Though the world often makes me feel insignificant and alone, God cares. I'll remind myself that He watches over me, He wants to be with me, and He hears my smaller-than-a-pea-sized prayer. He catches MY tears and knows what caused each one to fall into His hand. I believe with that thought- I can trust Him with one more day. Will you join me?

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Check out my bookstores. I have eBook devotionals, Bible study guides, poetry, and more in my Dove's Fire Ministries bookstore. My Amazon bookshelf has a couple of those in print or on Kindle. My devotional 31 Days in Psalm 31 is all about seeking God from the cave! Check it out!

Full Of It

 

This morning during my private devotions, I started studying 1 John to prepare for an upcoming live Zoom Bible study I'm hosting. (Let me know if you'd like a link to join!) I John is very connected to the gospel of John and I found myself reading the first chapter of this gospel over and over. It amazes me and pretty much blows my mind how God has orchestrated all this. Before He said, "Let there be light" He had already done everything. He'd already prepared the way for us to get back to Him, even before the fall happened in time. Jesus was crucified and raised to sit on the throne. Our sins were already forgiven before we ever even committed them. (We just need to accept His forgiveness.) 

So I'm reading through John chapter one with my mouth wide open in awe! My mind is running around crazy just thinking about all the wonderous works of God. The Word of God - His very breath become flesh and walked among man for a brief 33 years. In verse 14, it says He become human (NLT), lived on earth with us, and that He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. That can also be translated to grace and truth.

Does it not just blow your mind that God cares? He is eternal and time is such a small piece of eternity - yet that's where He chooses to meet us and walk with us. He's so much more than a "little-g" god. He desires intimacy with us. He wants to walk with us, to be with us. And when He is welcomed into our lives and He comes - He brings all He is with Him. Truth, forgiveness, light, understanding, comfort, peace, and of course - love. That just blows my mind.

It's amazing that He wants to walk through time with mankind, isn't it? But He's not limited to time like we are because eternity exists in Him. Time is but a small piece of eternity. Yet this eternal God of comfort, God of peace, God of grace, mercy, and truth - wants to be with us. And for mankind - that's great. But for the caregiver it's monumental. Because so many people don't want to be with us. No-fault - no blame - they don't know what to do with us. But God does.

He knows how to comfort us in ways beyond our understanding. He knows how to hold us, give us peace, and soothe us with His song. If we listen. Can you hear Him? Most of the time I can - unless caregiving gets too hectic! But He's always singing. Always comforting. Always pouring out His love on us.

Today, I will purposefully quiet my heart and listen for His song. I'll lean in a little closer to hear His heart as I tone down the crazy thoughts running through my heart and mind. I will purposefully look for His grace at work in my life today. And I will embrace His heart of comfort in the midst of the pain and grief that often accompanies caregiving. Will you join me?

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Check out my bookstores. I have eBook devotionals, Bible study guides, poetry, and more in my Dove's Fire Ministries bookstore. My Amazon bookshelf has a couple of those in print or on Kindle.