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Perfect Peace

Sometimes we look at the Old Testament prophets and think that their message was all gloom and doom with a few prophecies about the coming of Christ or the end times mixed in. But in reality, they were just people like us with a message from God. Not only did they go through many of the same things we do but they were moved with much compassion for the people of God. Ezekiel's wife died and Elisha died of an illness. They dealt with life just like we do. Right in the midst of their words of reproof and judgment we can find many shades of grace. When we see all that they were dealing with at the time and then read a passage like Isaiah 25 and 26 it can bring much comfort to us. We perceive prophets as very hard nosed, hard headed people. (And usually they are!) But Isaiah also understood the protection of the Lord and how to trust Him in adversity. In Isaiah 25:4 the prophet describes the Lord as a refuge from the storm and a  shade from the heat. Then in chapter 26 he continues...

Yet One Thing ...

It is very likely that there have been many losses for the caregiver. And these losses can cross many levels. For instance, we lost the person as we knew them and we lost our own freedom and lives.These losses can go to a deeper level when we look at how our emotions have been ransacked by the trauma, and how our lives have been turned upside down in the process. Now in reality most of us do not count the loss, we are motivated by the love we have for our loved ones and these are not things that we sit around and calculate. We just keep putting one foot in front of the other doing all the tasks that need to be done to make sure they are cared for properly. In a life where many things can change with just one phone call, or one slight miscalculation, it is comforting to know that some things simply will not  change. Of course we know that God's love for us will never change. But 1 Peter 1:4 says that our inheritance is imperishable, undefiled and will not fade away ... No matter...

Who's Expecting?

There are a lot of scriptures about waiting on God. David used the phrase many times throughout the Psalms. A good book on waiting is Andrew Murray's Waiting on God. It's a 30 day devotional which uses a different scripture that pertains to waiting on Him for each day's devotion. It seems to me that for the caregiver there is a lot of that. For that matter, throughout our life time we will find ourselves in a situation where all we can do is wait on Him.. Psalm 37:7 says to wait patiently on Him. In all honesty, I must say that my waiting many times is far from patient. It's more whining, angry and frustrated waiting that eventually yields to a quiet and patient waiting! But Micah 7:7 talks about waiting expectantly on the Lord. My first question of course would be expecting what? When my son was first injured I was waiting for the Lord to come in on a white horse and rescue us from the situation. Of course, that never happened...What are we waiting on then, if i...

After the Rainbow

In my reading this morning I came across this passage in Psalm 105. It's speaking of Joseph and how God sent him before to prepare the way for his family. I'm not sure that being sold into slavery by his own brothers is the way Joseph would have chosen to see God fulfill His word in his life - but that's the way it occurred. Verse 19 says that the word of the Lord tested Joseph. He knew God's promises but found himself sitting it out in a jail cell for a crime he did not even commit. How difficult it can be to be sitting on the promises! As caregivers living in the furnace sometimes it can seem like all the promises of God have faded away. When  Noah came through the most horrific experience of his life (the flood), God made him a promise and sealed it with a rainbow. How easy it must have been in that moment standing at the altar of sacrifice and seeing the first rainbow - to believe God's promise. But one day - it rained again. It's easy to believe His pr...

Keeping Faith

Think about all the things you have done before you found the time to read this short devotion. Personally, I have been up every two hours through the night to turn, change and check on my loved one. Then when I scraped myself off the sheets to get up a little bit ago I had to check his temperature, O2 levels and do a tube feeding. And now I am at the computer writing a devotion! And the day has barely started... do you relate? Our daily lives are full of taking care of our loved ones, making plans and appointments for them, fighting with doctor's offices and waiting to see if aides will show up today or not! It can be crazy and it can all chip away at our emotions and our faith. Sometimes we can sort of numb up and suck it all up to make it through a day. And you know what - it's okay! Each of us has our own unique situation to deal with and we have to do it the best way we can...putting one foot in front of the other and moving ourselves forward through the next 24 hours....

Praise in Adversity

Most of the time when we live in such a stressful state we do not think about praising God. We ask Him to help us get out, but praise is not always on our lips. The prophet Jonah found himself in a very deep, dark place - the belly of a whale. The difference, of course is that Jonah had disobeyed God and this was his punishment. Personally, I wrestled with whether I was going through this deep trial as punishment for some sin I had committed; or something I had omitted. We have all probably had those moments where we questioned why adversity had to happen in the first place, most of us at least thought we had our religious t's crossed and i's dotted. Unlike Jonah, our circumstances are not punishment for something we did wrong. We are not off course - and we must learn to rest in His peace and embrace His love for us once again. But Jonah had run the opposite direction to avoid what God had told him to do. He found himself in the deepest, darkest parts of the earth...the b...

Faith-filled Tears

Many times as caregivers, we walk around in a painful numbness. Are you familiar with it? It's like everything hurts until we go numb on the inside, but it still hurts. (You really won't be able to understand that unless you've walked it!) Of course, stopping for a day is not an option for many so we continue putting one foot in front of the other, continuing through the tasks that each day demands. That's not a complaint - just the way it is. So what do you do when the situation is overbearing? When you are overwhelmed with the day? I think Psalm 61 can help out a little. I found myself singing it to my son last night. The psalmist says Hear my cry O God; give heed to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been a refuge for me, a tower of strength against the enemy. There really is faith in crying out to Him. Last night the part that really stood out in my mind was the c...

7 Mountains

This morning as I was praying I had a familiar scripture come to mind. It is found in Psalm 125:2 and it says, as the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds His people from this time forth and forever. I had some idea of what that meant, but I did a small bit of research and found that there are 7 mountains around Jerusalem. And 7, of course, is the number of completeness - wholeness. It was interesting as I went through several maps and various information to see that these 7 mountains are indeed all the way around Jerusalem. And the same way that they cover all the edges of this great city, God surrounds us - all the way around. The other interesting fact to me was that where you have mountains - you also have great valleys. And in general, valleys represent the low places of our lives. But in reality - these valleys added an extra layer of protection for the city - the city that is surrounded by mountains. For me as a caregiver, I needed to know today that He is...

Even in the Furnace

Life brings us many days filled with many things. Living in the furnace (of caregiving) can get hot and stay hot. Sometimes that is the most difficult part - the fact that there is no real relief. Getting out for a few hours can bring a little relief, and much needed breaks - but then we still have to come back to an unchanging furnace. What a trial of faith... yet we just keep going; putting one foot in front of the other. Isn't that what it's all about? Just keeping on moving no matter what comes our way - no matter what our days look like - no matter what we must face today...that's faith.  We are to be examples of faith and believing even in the furnace. Actually, without the furnace to try our faith we would not be able to recognize it as such. Having faith means that we do keep going no matter what we see, no matter what we feel, no matter what is going on around us. We just continue to stand...because we have Holy Spirit in us to strengthen us and carry us on thro...

Any Given Day

For the caregiver we never know what types of situations may be presented to us, on any given day. But then of course, our regular day is filled with all sorts of stuff too. There are so many things that must be done in the course of a day that each day is already full. But then there are those times when any little thing can set the day on a totally different trek!  It might be a delayed delivery, a cancelled doctor's appointment, an aide who did not show up, or any number of seemingly small or large difficulties that arise. Quite honestly, our days are difficult enough to handle physically, emotionally and even spiritually without any kind of unpleasant surprises. One thing I am finally learning is to not stress over the things that I cannot change. It's a difficult thing for me too - trust me.  But as I was reading along the other morning I happened across a scripture that I use to quote a lot - especially in my youth pastoring days. It's Philippians 2:14 and is si...

Looking for Some Shade...

Last summer was the hottest summer ever on record in Oklahoma. The temperature was over 100 degrees for more than 60 days. Sorry I don't remember the exact number of days, but it was a very long time, trust me!  It was smothering hot and the times of day that should bring relief like early in the morning - just weren't working right. It was hot; and it was hot all the time. When I saw this scripture from Isaiah 25:4 I understood it a little better. The prophet says For You have been a defense for the helpless, a defense for the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat. ...  When it is so hot outside you can barely breathe, it is great to be able to sit in the shade for a few minutes. You really cannot do much more than that since it's so hot. Many people get very sick when they get too hot; so it's best to just sit and be still when it gets hot outside.  For the caregiver - it can seem hot all the time due to the intensity of our tria...

His Unchanging Promise

If we are breathing we have experienced change. The caregiver has no doubt seen many changes in their lives that have brought them into the position of providing care for their loved one(s). As we age, things change. Our children grow older, they have children, our jobs change and in general our lives are lived on a platform of change.  The only thing that doesn't change is God; and His attributes. He remains the same as do His promises concerning us, His children. Ephesians 3:14-19 reminds us of some of these precious, unchanging promises. Holy Spirit lives in us. That is something that will not change for the believer. Paul prays in verse 16 that his readers would be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man. That is my prayer for caregivers, and His children today. May we realize His strength in us to carry out our daily tasks today - simply because He lives in us.  Verse 17 reminds us that Christ dwells in our heart. Do you see the common theme? He...

The Heart Matters

When I was a church-goer, I was a "worship leader." Psalm 95:6 was one of our favorite choruses to sing "back in the day." Come let us worship and bow down, let us kneel before the Lord our God our maker. For He is our God, we are the people of His pasture; and the sheep of His hand." I have used this particular verse to teach on worship for many years. When adversity strikes we can tend to think that the rules of engagement concerning our worship have changed. But they have not.  God still needs us to come and bow before Him in sincere and unadulterated worship. Worship is not just a song we sing on Sunday morning at church. It's a lifestyle of humility before God...that sometimes can be expressed in the words to a song.  It is so important for us to guard our hearts when we are going through. It is very easy to become hardened by life's circumstances. On down in this particular psalm, the psalmist discusses how the Children of Israel's hear...

How Could that Happen?

Jesus was having a discussion with his disciples as it is recorded in John 14. In verse 19, He is explaining that the disciples would be able to see Him, but the world would not be able to see Him anymore. Judas (not Iscariot) asked the question that would be on anyone's mind. How is it that we can see you and the world cannot? That was Jesus' opportunity to begin retelling them the things He'd been saying all along. He spoke of loving the Father and keeping His word, how the Father would live in those who do that and the Holy Spirit's work. The he gives us verse 27. My peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. (NASB) And to that we must say, "Wow!" It does not matter what type of situation we are in as caregivers, we can have His peace in our hearts. It is possible to be in this daily turmoil and walk in peace. Our world is a painful world; there are m...

It's About Time...

One of my all time favorite passages is Psalm 46. There are several things that you can pull out of there to use! Of course, those who know me very well know I can camp out on Be still and know I am God. And the phrase the God of Jakob is with us is mentioned twice. But verse 1 I am pretty sure I memorized at a very young age and have carried it with me all these years. God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in times of trouble. This verse is usually one of the first ones my mind pulls up when trouble shows up. It has brought comfort and strength to me over the years. Earlier this week I was sharing a devotion on a conference call and this scripture came out during the teaching. And right then and there it hit me that He is a present help. I had always thought about it in the sense that He is present like He's here. He is present and ready to help. But as the words spilled out of my mouth I thought of it a little differently. The fact that He is present , He...

Where Would He Go?

The caregiver's life is full....of caregiving! Our days are filled with assisting another perform their own SDLs. (skills for daily living) This can range from minimum assistance and supervision to complete 24/7 care. No matter what level of assistance we give, it's not easy taking care of someone else. We are very quick to put our own needs on hold to serve our loved one. In essence, we already lost our lives - at least the one we knew before - to care for them. And it's not always easy working through the emotions that go along with any given caregiving situation. So how do we deal with it ?  The first thing to consider is that Jesus put His "life" on hold to take care of us too! He left eternity to walk through time only to be mistreated, persecuted and killed. In His darkest moment at Gethsemane, He did not consider His own emotions, feelings, wants or desires more important than completing the task the Father had sent Him to do...and that wasn't for His...

The Biggest Attack

There can be lots of things that nag at your mind and emotions throughout the day. It would be difficult to try to discuss them because our situations are so vastly different. Each set of circumstances that got us into the caregiver's role is unique...but there is one battle we fight that is most likely very much the same for all of us. That is the fight of faith. It may be very unique to me so forgive me please! But it seems this is one area that the enemy really likes to stir up a lot of the time. He would so like for us to think that we do not have faith or else we would not be in these circumstances. If we had faith then our loved one would not be sick or maimed. But this is simply not true. 1 Peter 5:8-10 talks about resisting the devil in his attacks. It says for us to be sober and also to be alert . We cannot let our circumstances lull us to sleep. We must pick up that Bible and read, talk to God, and stay very diligent in our walk of faith, especially from where we ar...

How Good Can You Throw?

Do you remember the various games we used to play as a child that required we throw a ball? I can remember throwing a ball over the house with someone else. It was fun because you never knew exactly when it was coming back over or where it would come from or where it would land! I always prided myself on how easily I could throw the ball over the house. And I had a pretty accurate eye and arm when it came to throwing baseballs or footballs too! But when it comes to throwing my cares on Him it seems like I lost my touch!  1 Peter 5:7 says that we should be casting all  your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. This casting is not a passively handing or gently tossing action. It is forcefully throwing all the anxiety of my day, week, or life on Him. Why? Because He is going to do all  the caring for me! I can roll it all over onto Him and let Him do my worrying. Now of course it is only worrying when we are carrying our own load and trying to find our own way in ...

Humility is a Choice

We all have questions about a lot of different things. And really, there is nothing wrong with asking those questions; whether or not we get an answer from Him! And on a personal note - I think it's best to be totally honest with God. Think about it, does it help your situation if you are angry with Him if you do not express your feelings? Suppressing what you really feel is not healthy, and it is not walking humbly before Him. I had a friend one time who asked how I could be so frank with God even when I was angry at a situation. My explanation was that He knew anyway...I just as well be honest!  This open honesty with Him about what you are feeling or even just how your day is going is part of being humble before Him. It will help nothing for us to come at Him shaking our fist! However, it is beneficial to humbly tell Him how you feel. And it is not a lack of humility to ask why? Humility is a quality but it is also a choice. We can choose how we want to walk before God. We c...

Strength to Serve

This little walk through 1 Peter has helped me sort through many of my thoughts. But this one verse helps me bring my perspective back to where it should be. Caregiving is strenuous on body, soul and spirit. Many days you have to just suck it up and give it all you have - even though you feel there is nothing left! One way to look at caregiving is to consider yourself a servant. We spend our days (and nights!) taking care of our loved ones. Depending on the nature of the situation we must perform various tasks of different levels of difficulty. Some just need assistance with skills associated with daily living, others maybe just need help with mobility, and still others need total care. Whatever our function is in the lives of our loved one - we can consider ourselves their servant for Christ's sake. He said there was no greater love displayed than when we lay down our lives for another. And we have done that. 1 Peter 4:11b says this: whoever serves is to do so as one who is ...

Strength in Quietness

On any given day the frustrations can mount! (maybe it's just me....) You actually schedule a quick trip to the store to grab a few items and the aid doesn't show! Or you plan an outing and your loved one is not up to par. Maybe you've called the doctor and they did not return your phone call. For me it can be the fact that my son didn't eat at all, or he will not cooperate with his exercises! Some things that seem like small things can add up to be huge on days when tensions run tight! (like spilling the bath water, tripping over a rug that's been there for months or forgetting where you put the box cutter the day supplies come in! lol!) If we are not careful there are so many things to do any given day that we can live life wound up like a taut rubber band. Trying to maintain a quiet spirit is something we might laugh at!  But in 1 Peter 3:4 the apostle says that a gentle and quiet spirit is precious in the sight of God ...This attitude is what we are to be ado...

Do You Fit the Mold?

One thing that really surprised me when I began the walk of a caregiver was the rejection. We try not to take it personal by telling ourselves it's not on purpose, just that people do not quite know what to do with us. We do not fit the normal mode. We cannot always just get up and go out for a cup of coffee, grab a quick brunch with a friend or attend church like we used to. But we still have the same desires and need for friendships and relationships as those who are not caregivers. Rarely does someone cross that line and actually bring us  lunch or a cup of coffee. And there are few (and I thank God for them!) who will come and sit for a few minutes just to chat. But overall there is this rejection that must be dealt with.  We are in good company. 1 Peter 2:4 has this to say of Christ: and coming to Him as to a living stone which has been rejected by men , but is choice and precious in the sight of God ... Jesus had crowds of people following Him until He hit what was p...

Where is Your Hope?

Along the journey of caregiving there are many disappointments. I have heard it said that when tragedy strikes you find out who your real friends are. For me this has proven true, sadly enough. Many people are willing to walk through it with you for a time, but they cannot handle a life-long commitment. But then God seems to always send true friends who can be there even when you don't know you need anything! It is certain that along life's journey (caregiving or not) we cannot put our hope or our faith in people as they will disappoint us.  For that matter, we cannot put our hope in the medical profession either. There are some wonderful professionals that will go the extra mile and do all they can and a little more. But ultimately as wonderful as they can be they are not our hope. 1Peter 1:21 reminds us to keep our hope in God. No matter what kind of circumstances press in us daily - and for caregivers they can be many in a day - our hope must remain in the Lord.  Romans...

But I am Sober!

It is very easy as caregivers to get caught up in all the daily responsibilities and activities and get lulled to sleep by them. On one hand we are so busy there's barely time to breathe - but that can lead us right into a very sluggish spiritual state. Especially for those of us who cannot get out very much - it's easy to just sit back and become spiritually unaware. For us - 1 Peter 1:13 is a great reminder!  This verse is the apostle's reminder to the church to prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. And from there he goes on to discuss the topic of holiness and our walk before the Lord. When you are only at home most of the time it is easy to think you may be exempt from this verse. But we must remember that it is imperative for us to stay sober in our walk as it is always before the Lord,  not before man. Man will not ever be our judge - God is. For this reason...

Preserved in Him

When I read across this scripture in my morning readings today, I just had to share it. Now all caregivers may not be like me - but my whole world changed with one phone call. My life was jerked away from me in an instant. And although that has been very traumatic in every way possible one good thing is that all my religious thinking has been just as shaken. That's why I so enjoyed my meditations on this verse this morning.  1 Peter 1:5 says this - ...who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. This whole chapter is worth a good slow read- let it be absorbed into your heart and spirit. But this phrase sort of grabbed me because even though my world was shaken that part of me that is saved - my soul - is very protected by the power of God ! Think about that for a minute or two - your body did not get "saved." It's your soul that accepted Him and the changes living in Him brings.  And while we are still...