Daily Devotions for Caregivers

 I took Chris to our local minor league baseball team's game yesterday. I must say I give the ballpark an A+ on accessibility. The parking guys pointed me to a handicap spot right near the gate. And from there, I just rolled him in and found our accessible seating - which just means a chair beside an empty spot for the wheelchair to fit in! It was great. He could see fine and even though it was a bit loud at times - it wasn't too loud for him. What joy fills my heart when I find things to do that are positive. As we sat and watched the game, we became part of the crowd. We were all watching the game and cheering on the home team. We had one purpose - besides being entertained, and that was to support the local team. We all cheered when our guys made a play. We hooped and hollered when one of them stole a base or hit a home run. It was so amazing to be part of something bigger than us - to be part of the community.   It made me think about the crowds who followed Jesus and...

 This morning in the middle of my live Facebook "Peace Out!" devotions, I was reading a scripture and it just hit me. Ever have that happen? I was sharing out of one of my favorites, Psalm 61. David is pouring his heart out to God. I've always focused on being overwhelmed, running to God, and letting Him lead me to the Rock. But as I was reading it for the thousandth time, I saw this phrase - from the end of the earth. Suddenly, I wondered what David meant. Did he mean he thought the world was flat and he was living on the edge about to fall off? Or did he mean time was coming to a close and the earth was ending? Neither of those made sense to me. I don't know what David was going through specifically, of course. But it's obvious he was dealing with some big stuff. Then, it hit me - David was at the end of his rope! Maybe they just didn't have that saying yet! lol. He cried out - from the end of the earth - the end of my rope - I will cry to You, O Lord! My qu...

  Do you ever just get too tired? Do you ever want to quit? Do you ever sit down for a whole 30 seconds and think about not getting back up? Ever? Who am I kidding? Sometimes I forget who I'm talking to. Lol. As caregivers, burnout is real. But the problem for most of us, is we don't get a break even in the midst of burnout, right? Let's face it. If we had a bit more help we might  avoid burnout - but once we feel that we are in a season of burnout and stressed out - there's still no help. It's easy to feel stuck. I try to do a few things to avoid burnout and to cope. Someone told me one time that I had learned how to live even in the midst of the situation. I think she was right. I have learned to slow down and enjoy an afternoon cup of tea (or coffee!!!). I try to get outside as much as possible because sunshine and fresh air are essential to a healthy life. Some days that means sitting on the patio so I can see Chris in the recliner through the window. But I'...

  I have recently discovered that I say a lot of things and expect people to read between the lines.  You may do it too whether you realize it or not.  As caregivers, it can be difficult to find the words for our emotions. We can't always adequately describe our situations with words. And even if we can, there are many things we deal with daily that are taboo topics. Or, of course, we don't deal with some topics as we want our loved ones to have some dignity. So we speak in riddles and only those who really know - fully understand. What we really mean. I was thinking about this a lot yesterday and here are a few examples that I came up with, maybe you've got a few of your own. I need to get out more. - Really means I am so lonely. Wanna come over for a cup of coffee? - Means I am at the end of my rope. I feel neglected, alone, and I need a friend. I am eating myself out of house and home lol - Really means - I'm experiencing emotional eating and I don't know how to ...

  One thing caregivers can understand is long nights. Recently, I haven't had them as often, and for that I am thankful. But I do still have some and last night was one of them. I hate it because Chris is uncomfortable and no matter what I do it doesn't help. Since he is nonverbal, he can't tell me to reposition him, sit him up more or less, or that there is a wrinkle in his sheet. His numbers were good (heart rate, 02, and temp), so I talked myself through the night, basically.  Long Night Talks With God During those long nights, God and I talk a lot. Well, it's mostly me whining and crying and wondering why a lot. But He listens. And most of the time, He answers. The early hours of this morning were no different.  I try not to lash out at God, but sometimes I'm just angry. I lost my son and it seems God just "saved" him enough to keep him here to suffer sometimes. Man, those long nights can really show you your own thoughts loud and clear, huh? Last nigh...

 As I was preparing for my Facebook live devotions this morning, I started meditating on the main scripture. It is out of Isaiah 43, and God is reminding Israel that He is the One God.   He is our source of peace, gives us wisdom, loves us unconditionally, and hears our prayers, even the goofy ones! I thought about how back in their day, they took a piece of wood or stone and crafted a god. Then, they bowed down to it like it was going to do something - anything for them. I never got that. Can something I make with my own hands be "greater" than me? I don't see how. It definitely couldn't hear them or respond to their pleas for help. It has no love, no wisdom to share. While we may not ever find ourselves physically bowing before a big rock, we, as humans, can tend to run to what is familiar and tangible. That's why so many turn to drugs and alcohol. They provide a "feeling" or at least a change in the way they feel. It seems measurable, but it leads dow...

 I've been rolling a lot of questions and thoughts over and over in my mind. The big question I keep coming up with is this: what if He doesn't? You can fill the blank in with your circumstances. For me - it's what if He doesn't ever heal my son, can I live with that? What if the "morning" never comes - because joy comes in the morning, right? What if trouble does  last "always"? (Trouble don't last always, they say.) What if He doesn't calm the storm while we are out there in the boat?  I've been thinking about it a lot. In my mind, I'm sitting out in a boat and there's a storm raging all around me. We know the story in Mark 4 where Jesus was in the boat asleep in the middle of the storm. (That's total peace right there!) Then in Matthew 14, He came walking out on the water to his disciples in the boat in the middle of the storm. I've had people tell me that trouble won't last forever - the storm will go away. But so ...