Daily Devotions for Caregivers

I do not have to describe the huge emotional swings caregivers can experience even in a matter of minutes. And when we do have those moments when we are really down - who is there to help us up? Sadly, many of us suffer silently and alone. This just makes the process of working ourselves back out into some sort of hope - even more difficult. But it's do-able... To be totally honest - I have been on the downward side of things of late. It's been more difficult than usual to try to get my head back up above water so I could breathe again. And I think I still have a ways to go. This morning I was thinking of Psalm 13 - O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? (It is somewhat comforting to see that a person He used to write the Bible felt the same way I do!) How long will You look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? (NLT) I can honestly say I feel this way during thos...

This morning I was reading Romans 8 about the different callings in the body of Christ. My mind took off on some adventurous thoughts about how that works from here. Our thinking can become very clouded by circumstances. This is only because we tend to view our callings and our gifts from the setting inside the modern church. This can be detrimental in many ways...our gifts and callings did not disappear when tragedy came our way- it's in our spiritual DNA. Think for a few minutes about Joseph - one of our heroes! He had dreams as a child. I am sure they seemed far away from the prison cell he was being unjustly held in. But God never changed His mind. Honestly dealing with the callings on my life has been one of the most difficult things to deal with - me trying to figure out how God was going to pull it off. But He can use adversity to His advantage and for His purpose. Turmoil and trouble do not interrupt His plan or purpose. It may just look differently than we thought it wo...

Do the days all start to feel the same sometimes? Each day has the same list of tasks that the caregiver has to perform. I see people glad it's Friday, or can't wait until the weekend. But most of the time one day is just like another for the caregiver and the chores really do not change much from day to day. Weekends or holidays are pretty much the same except maybe there will be no aide to help. If we are not careful we can slip into this boring existence and can live on the edge (or in the middle of) burnout. That's when we must be extra careful about what we say. I remember when I was younger I would go visit my grandmother in the nursing home and all she would do is gripe about how we didn't come to see her often enough. Although I knew that was true it always made for a very unpleasant experience and I dreaded going to see her and sadly even avoided it when I could. Personally, I do not want to become that person. If we are not careful we can get so caught up in...

Sometimes it seems like we can be so cut off from the rest of the world. We just have to face it - our lives are different . We cannot always come and go like others. It's not always possible to just jump up and run to the store just because a necessary item is running low. Trust me - it even takes careful planning to not run out of toilet paper and trash bags! Many times the caregiver may feel like we live in a cave and totally separate from the rest of the world. For many, going to church regularly, or even at all, is out of the question. This morning I was reading Romans 14 and came to verse 17 which says this: the kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. I found this very comforting. We are not missing out on the Kingdom of God just because we live separate lives. Actually, we may be closer to the Kingdom than many common church goers . These three things righteousness, peace and joy are ours because we not only live in the Kingdom - but the Kingd...

For years I have taught about entering into His rest. I've said that striving to enter His rest is the only work we should be doing.Lately it seems that this topic keeps coming back up. But for those of us who live in a world without natural rest - how are we supposed to enter His rest? For the caregiver there is barely time to turn around. Many of us live with a constant soul pain because the internal pains associated with the level of loss just do not cease. Plus there are the day to day struggles that just plain caregiving brings. How are we supposed to enter His rest from here? I love Hebrews 4 on this topic. And specifically, verse 7 sticks out in my mind today. It says that He fixed a day - today. He was pleading for His children to enter into His rest on that fixed today way back in Exodus 17; and then repeated the "today"in Psalm 95. And now it's another today here in Hebrews4. He fixed today so that it is always the today we are looking for. so today ...

When my son had his vehicle accident he was in ICU for about 3.5 weeks. Since I was from out of town I just set up camp in the ICU waiting room.One morning when I was there alone for some reason Psalm 121 came to mind. I realized that although my son was at the time getting very good medical care, the medical staff was not where my help was coming from. The nurses or doctors were not my source of help but the Lord was my helper. Psalm 121:2 says my help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth. It goes on to say that He is always on watch - never sleeps. And furthermore He is also our keeper (v.5) and even our protector (v.7) However, it says He is the protector and keeper of our soul ...He keeps and protects that part of us that makes us - us. When life around us seems to be in turmoil - He will keep us. It's comforting to someone like me who messes up a lot that He will not throw us away. No situation gets so out-of-hand that He walks away. He will continue to keep, p...

We have no need to rehearse any or all of the reasons that caregivers become tired. After months of cargiving there can be a weariness that sets in. It's more than the body simply being tired - it's a soul tired. That covers the mind, will and emotions. Sometimes we can be too tired to feel, too tired to think and we just go on functioning because we're breathing basically. There seems to be no where to take a breath or a break; and the daily duties certainly won't wait for us to stop for any amount of time. What do you do when you get soul tired ? The answer, of course, is to Come to Him. Jesus offered strength for the soul when we come to Him. In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus offers this rest. He bids us who are weary  and those who are heavy laden (burdened) to come to Him for rest.Then He goes on to speak of how gentle and humble He is. Somehow there is comfort in trusting in His gentleness and humility. And from His gentle and humble state He offers us rest for our so...

Do you ever feel like others don't have the time to deal with you? I know the world is a busy place and it is no different for the caregiver; but wouldn't it be nice if someone had a few minutes to share a cup of coffee with you?  Aides do not come even though they are scheduled because they had something more important  to do. They do not say it that way - but that's the raw truth. And getting someone to sit for a couple hours here and there (even for pay) can be difficult because it seems that everyone already has plans. Many times it adds to the solitude of the cave - that feeling that you can't get out - And yet at the same time it's easier to just adjust to being in the cave than it is to try to find someone to help...because it seems no one has time.   There are days where it seems like we ourselves do not have time to turn around twice. The chores and tasks associated with caregiving can easily suck a day away. We must feed, bathe, and transfer our loved ...

Trying to view God through the pain everyday brings can be so very difficult for the caregiver. This is partly due to the fact that the pain we are in never really goes away. Our hearts are always crying as we see our loved ones as they are...and not how, or even who, they used to be. It's heart wrenching and there is no rest from the pain. If we are not careful this can cloud our view of God; and foster many questions. lots of whys... Job managed to see God through the pain and in the midst of heart wrenching circumstances. When at first all of his children were snatched away in just one day he fell to his knees and cried out to God in worship. I do not think he sang any of our nice little choruses we have today, nor did he sing a hymn. The turning to God in the pain  was the act of worship. It's so easy to do the opposite sometimes. Then later in Job when his own body was in intense pain and agony he made a statement that baffles me. He said even though God slays me - ...

Benaiah got a whole 4 verses in the Bible, but this dude was a warrior of warriors. He actually earned himself the position of being over King David's bodyguard. How? Well in just this short passage we find out that he did several phenomenal things. He killed 2 of Moab's best warriors. He also went into hand-to-hand with an Egyptian warrior; the thing was that Benaiah only had a club and the Egyptian warrior had a sword. I guess Benaiah decided he'd rather fight with the sword so he took the sword away from the Egyptian and used it to kill him. There's no disgrace like being killed with your own sword! But the thing that I find most intriguing about Benaiah is that he killed a lion. That is enough when you think about the lack of technological and tactical weaponry back then. But he had other factors. Not only was he facing a lion (the king of the jungle!) he was in a pit; and besides that it was snowy which means no place for a good foothold. That's all admirable...

Psalm 121 is a wonderful reminder of how He keeps us. It is not the health professionals who are our helper or keeper - it is the Lord. They can perform some wonderful services, but it is and will always be God who keeps us. As I reread this psalm yesterday I thought of my caregiving journey. As many, it had a traumatic start and has been a rather long one so far. But my thoughts went to how He has not failed to carry me. There have certainly been times that I have been angry at God; times when my faith faltered greatly. But He has not failed to hold me even when my faith didn't hold up. He is the keeper of my soul . There is absolutely nothing that can harm the eternal part of me - He will hold me and keep me hidden in Himself. These types of circumstances that makes caregivers out of us can definitely try our faith. There can be so many questions from the start - and really no answers to be found. This can be so very frustrating especially at a time when you feel your "...

I am so glad that we have a consistent God. He does not change with the winds of time; He never lacks strength or gets tired!...on the other hand - I do get tired, change and lack strength. Some nights I am ready to go to bed long before there is any chance of getting there. Other nights I am still up into the wee hours of the morning working on a project or something.  God is constant. That is such a comfort to me in a world where everything can change in a second. This is why I was so excited when I came across Colossians 3 in my readings this morning. Toward the end of the chapter Paul is talking about family and work relations. He is not talking to "church workers." Verse 23 he admonished the Christians to do their work heartily for the Lord, instead of for men. And goes on at the end of verse 24 to say that no matter what type of "work" we are doing - it is Christ that we serve. Today as you go about the normal (if there is anything "normal" in y...

In 1 Samuel 30 the psalmist king David had found himself in a terrible spot. He had been running from Saul for years and had joined up with the Philistines. Remember them? They are the ones who sent out Goliath way back when David was just a kid. And now David found himself on their side of the field. Funny how ironic life can be.  The trouble was that because of David's history of killing their giants and such, he was not to be trusted; or so they thought. Imagine this: they are on the verge of a historic battle and the warrior David has a hand itching that wants to grab a sword and go help them out. But their leadership told him that he could not go. Not so much because they didn't trust him; but the other soldiers might feel like they needed to watch their back with him on the battle field. They were still scared of him. They were also concerned that he would not be able to fight against his own people. They knew his heart. So David begins his journey back to Ziklag. He...

Some days it seems we can have it all together. Everything is going along good, emotions are intact, and the day overall just isn't bad. And then outta nowhere....someone says something about faith that makes it sound like you don't have any since you are in adverse circumstances. Is it just me, or does it happen to you too? I'm beginning to think that faith is a little like courage; if there isn't some challenge to address it doesn't really count.   When the statement occurred I was flooded with questions and hopelessness tried to swallow me up. Because if it all relies on me - what I believe - what I say - what I can change with my attitude - then what is my faith in : myself. True faith believes period. The fact that we are still clinging on to Him even when everything around us does not seem to make any sense at all, or doesn't seem to be changing at all is the deepest faith - not the lack of faith. I must say that I do not have any confidence in myself...

Yesterday we looked at Ephesians where Paul told the Christians to stand. Today let's check out Psalm 31:24. The psalmist says this: be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who hope in the Lord. I think this will be my motto today: I will be strong. That really sounds funny to me as a caregiver - like there's really an option! lol! It seems like there's a choice being given here: be strong - or don't. The understood subject is "you" - you be strong . That's just the first part of the psalmist's instructions. He goes on to say let your heart take courage. This implies another choice. We can let our heart take courage or reject it. Today we must trust that He is giving us His strength to walk this journey; and He will encourage our hearts - if we let Him. Think about allowing His strength and courage to take over the space in your heart today.Allow His peace to walk you through whatever you may face today.

When we wake up in the morning we never know what a day is going to bring. Each day is filled with much uncertainty. Some days it feels like everything is a fight. You know? Trying to get aides who come on time - or show up period, dealing with government agencies and various types of health care providers can be draining. And of course all of that is on top of the difficulty of taking care of another. Do you ever just get tired of fighting? I know I do. It can feel like we are struggling uphill simply trying to get others to do their jobs so we can do ours. Sorry I do not have a check list of how to make those sorts of things go smoother or faster! (Don't you know I wish I did!!?) But here's what I am thinking today. If you get tired of fighting and struggling; just stand. In Ephesians 6 the apostle Paul told the church to stand. He did not tell them to progress, to struggle, to fight or to do anything else at all. He just said when you have done all , stand firm . (Eph...

Do you ever wish life had a "delete" button? Maybe even a "do over" button would be nice occasionally. There are times I feel like if I could do some things over I would either change the way I did them or not do them at all! Isn't it amazing that God does not feel that way... ever! He never wishes He did something differently; and never hopes for do-overs. He knew everything would happen the way it has. He knew my faith would falter when great tragedy struck. He also knew of the times I would be angry with Him and silent before Him. He even knew I would question His existence. Actually, He knew every single question and doubt that would enter my heart and mind in the face of tragedy... but He did not give up on me! He did not cast me away and mutter words of disgust. He simply waited until I came back to the point where I could not live without His touch in my life. Caregiving can place different levels of demand on us depending on the particular situatio...

One of the difficult parts of being a caregiver is being separated from the mainstream. There are many times that we can feel very alone. And this alone-ness can eat away at your soul. You can feel very disconnected from friends and even family as time goes by. It's not always an every day thing but there are certainly periods of time that you can feel this deep loneliness.It's not really anybody's fault - they mostly just do not know what to do with us since our lives are so different. But we are a part of something much bigger. Ephesians 2:19 says this you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and are of God's household... Somehow even in the loneliness there is comfort in knowing that we are a part of His household. We are not separated from God nor the true body of Christ. If we think about how huge His household must be it helps to bring comfort and wash away a small bit of the alone-ness. We think of our household as t...

For caregivers each day can bring with it many decisions that must be made. These are difficult enough when making them for ourselves, but for those who are taking care of someone else they can be quite frustrating and even more difficult. While we cannot always look up word for word what we should do in each situation, we can turn to scripture for wisdom. Proverbs 2:6 states this: The Lord gives wisdom. From His mouth come knowledge and understanding. That just about covers it all really. He will give us wisdom. James chapter one says that He gives wisdom to those who ask of Him. That part is actually pretty simple. What makes it difficult is waiting on His answers. We tend to ask for wisdom and then try to walk on in our own strength. Wisdom is not impatient and sometimes it dictates that we do not make decisions too hastily. We can ask - and He will give us the wisdom to walk through difficult days and make difficult decisions. The other part of this verse says that from His mo...

The life of a caregiver does not include enough time to get bored. And although the loneliness can chip away at our soul, there are never two days alike and plenty of chores that simply must be done every single day to keep us plenty busy. Sometimes I look at how much I need to get done in a day and wonder if I will make it. Many times I wonder what it is that God wants from me... from here. Life looks so different now. Years have been spent doing the religious things and sadly enough it seems I am so guilty of mistaking those activities for relationship. But these circumstances did not take Him by surprise - He sort of planned ahead for them. In Psalm 97 there are a couple of very interesting points. Verse 10 reminds us that we are to hate evil and love God. There are no stipulations for when times get tough or situations change; it's always the same. But the next part of verse 10 says that He preserves the souls (not the bodies)  of His godly ones; He delivers them from the ha...

As caregivers some days are better than others; as with life itself. Some days it's easy to find that groove and stay on schedule to get everything completed. And then there are days where it seems like everything just piles up on top of you. We carry a constant load; even on our best days - or our infrequent days out - it remains the same. Some days we can simply take in stride and then other days little things pile up. (The aide doesn't show up and you planned on running to the grocery store, to the bank to deposit a check for covering expenses, or to the pharmacy to fill prescriptions. Or you plan a day out and the person who is supposed to watch your loved one bails on you at the last minute.) Any little thing can topple us on any given day...and it can all add up to a much heavier load emotionally. But it's okay. We are like the energizer bunny..we just keep going and going and going...you do not get to stop being a caregiver. So how do we deal with the day to day ...

As a caregiver, you know those mornings when you just wake up tired. It may be after a sleepless night or having to get up all through the night to care for your loved one; but you just wake up already tired before the day has even begun. Those days you feel like you'll never have strength again and it feels like you've just always been tired. When I have those nights where sleep was constantly disrupted, my thoughts go to Isaiah 40:28. The prophet asks this question:  Do you not know? Have you not heart?  Have I heard what? The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth... does not become weary or tired. Isaiah takes his readers through three descriptions of our Father: God, Lord and Creator . And then he reminds us that God does not get tired or  weary! He never runs down and never rolls His eyes - no matter what my day brings His way. He is constantly watching over us to shield us with His grace and protect our hearts with His peace. I am so ...

It is interesting to me that Jesus promised that when He left this earthly realm He would send a comforter. The Greek indicates someone who will walk alongside you, someone to stay right by your side to help and comfort you along the way. Why didn't He send a healer ? I know that God heals, there is no doubt about that - why didn't Jesus use any of the other names of God when speaking of the Holy Spirit's indwelling? He could have send He was sending a healer, provider, a peace maker or a way maker. God certainly does all of those things through the work of Holy Spirit here on earth. But Jesus chose instead to refer to Holy Spirit as comforter, teacher and guide in John 14-15. The fact that Jesus started John 14 with do not let your heart be troubled and then repeated it again in verse 27 of the same chapter indicates there would probably be some things arise in the apostle's lives that would be unsettling or troublesome. Jesus indicates that Holy Spirit will teach...

I heard a chorus last week that had this phrase in it: brokenness that separates . It really made me think of a lot of different aspects of brokenness and I came to the conclusion that there are two kinds of brokenness, and I am acquainted with both of them. There is a brokenness that God is near - the kind that says, Lord, I am broken before You and I need you. But there is a time when we are broken and in our self-preservation we draw away from Him. It is not a bad thing to be broken before Him in humility. This is the type of brokenness that He is near, this is when we can come to Him bleeding and needing help. But the other brokenness is sustained by our departure from His presence. This separation comes as we try to hold on to the hurts in our lives and not release them to Him and allow Him to mend. I have experienced this kind of broken - the kind that makes you mad and so you withdraw from Him in anger. I did not understand why these things had to happen (my son's autom...

Jeremiah is sometimes called the weeping prophet. To many he seems to be a very big whiner. But he carried such a passionate burden for the people of God that he wept much of the time. If you briefly turn through the pages of Jeremiah you will find some very harsh things God had to say to his people. And besides obeying God and having to speak to His people in such a manner, he was imprisoned and persecuted. Lamentations gives us a closer look into the tender heart of this prophet. (Yes, a prophet does have a tender side!) He wept over the disobedience of his own people and he did not understand why they didn't just obey God. I am sure when he was mercilessly thrown into the mucky pit he wondered if his life was over. He was left to sink in the muddy mess and basically left for dead. Do you think he ever questioned God's call on his life? As a caregiver and the huge life changes that role brought I have found myself questioning God about many things. But in Lamentations 3:1...

Sometimes we look at the Old Testament prophets and think that their message was all gloom and doom with a few prophecies about the coming of Christ or the end times mixed in. But in reality, they were just people like us with a message from God. Not only did they go through many of the same things we do but they were moved with much compassion for the people of God. Ezekiel's wife died and Elisha died of an illness. They dealt with life just like we do. Right in the midst of their words of reproof and judgment we can find many shades of grace. When we see all that they were dealing with at the time and then read a passage like Isaiah 25 and 26 it can bring much comfort to us. We perceive prophets as very hard nosed, hard headed people. (And usually they are!) But Isaiah also understood the protection of the Lord and how to trust Him in adversity. In Isaiah 25:4 the prophet describes the Lord as a refuge from the storm and a  shade from the heat. Then in chapter 26 he continues...

It is very likely that there have been many losses for the caregiver. And these losses can cross many levels. For instance, we lost the person as we knew them and we lost our own freedom and lives.These losses can go to a deeper level when we look at how our emotions have been ransacked by the trauma, and how our lives have been turned upside down in the process. Now in reality most of us do not count the loss, we are motivated by the love we have for our loved ones and these are not things that we sit around and calculate. We just keep putting one foot in front of the other doing all the tasks that need to be done to make sure they are cared for properly. In a life where many things can change with just one phone call, or one slight miscalculation, it is comforting to know that some things simply will not  change. Of course we know that God's love for us will never change. But 1 Peter 1:4 says that our inheritance is imperishable, undefiled and will not fade away ... No matter...

There are a lot of scriptures about waiting on God. David used the phrase many times throughout the Psalms. A good book on waiting is Andrew Murray's Waiting on God. It's a 30 day devotional which uses a different scripture that pertains to waiting on Him for each day's devotion. It seems to me that for the caregiver there is a lot of that. For that matter, throughout our life time we will find ourselves in a situation where all we can do is wait on Him.. Psalm 37:7 says to wait patiently on Him. In all honesty, I must say that my waiting many times is far from patient. It's more whining, angry and frustrated waiting that eventually yields to a quiet and patient waiting! But Micah 7:7 talks about waiting expectantly on the Lord. My first question of course would be expecting what? When my son was first injured I was waiting for the Lord to come in on a white horse and rescue us from the situation. Of course, that never happened...What are we waiting on then, if i...

In my reading this morning I came across this passage in Psalm 105. It's speaking of Joseph and how God sent him before to prepare the way for his family. I'm not sure that being sold into slavery by his own brothers is the way Joseph would have chosen to see God fulfill His word in his life - but that's the way it occurred. Verse 19 says that the word of the Lord tested Joseph. He knew God's promises but found himself sitting it out in a jail cell for a crime he did not even commit. How difficult it can be to be sitting on the promises! As caregivers living in the furnace sometimes it can seem like all the promises of God have faded away. When  Noah came through the most horrific experience of his life (the flood), God made him a promise and sealed it with a rainbow. How easy it must have been in that moment standing at the altar of sacrifice and seeing the first rainbow - to believe God's promise. But one day - it rained again. It's easy to believe His pr...

Think about all the things you have done before you found the time to read this short devotion. Personally, I have been up every two hours through the night to turn, change and check on my loved one. Then when I scraped myself off the sheets to get up a little bit ago I had to check his temperature, O2 levels and do a tube feeding. And now I am at the computer writing a devotion! And the day has barely started... do you relate? Our daily lives are full of taking care of our loved ones, making plans and appointments for them, fighting with doctor's offices and waiting to see if aides will show up today or not! It can be crazy and it can all chip away at our emotions and our faith. Sometimes we can sort of numb up and suck it all up to make it through a day. And you know what - it's okay! Each of us has our own unique situation to deal with and we have to do it the best way we can...putting one foot in front of the other and moving ourselves forward through the next 24 hours....

Most of the time when we live in such a stressful state we do not think about praising God. We ask Him to help us get out, but praise is not always on our lips. The prophet Jonah found himself in a very deep, dark place - the belly of a whale. The difference, of course is that Jonah had disobeyed God and this was his punishment. Personally, I wrestled with whether I was going through this deep trial as punishment for some sin I had committed; or something I had omitted. We have all probably had those moments where we questioned why adversity had to happen in the first place, most of us at least thought we had our religious t's crossed and i's dotted. Unlike Jonah, our circumstances are not punishment for something we did wrong. We are not off course - and we must learn to rest in His peace and embrace His love for us once again. But Jonah had run the opposite direction to avoid what God had told him to do. He found himself in the deepest, darkest parts of the earth...the b...

Many times as caregivers, we walk around in a painful numbness. Are you familiar with it? It's like everything hurts until we go numb on the inside, but it still hurts. (You really won't be able to understand that unless you've walked it!) Of course, stopping for a day is not an option for many so we continue putting one foot in front of the other, continuing through the tasks that each day demands. That's not a complaint - just the way it is. So what do you do when the situation is overbearing? When you are overwhelmed with the day? I think Psalm 61 can help out a little. I found myself singing it to my son last night. The psalmist says Hear my cry O God; give heed to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been a refuge for me, a tower of strength against the enemy. There really is faith in crying out to Him. Last night the part that really stood out in my mind was the c...

This morning as I was praying I had a familiar scripture come to mind. It is found in Psalm 125:2 and it says, as the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds His people from this time forth and forever. I had some idea of what that meant, but I did a small bit of research and found that there are 7 mountains around Jerusalem. And 7, of course, is the number of completeness - wholeness. It was interesting as I went through several maps and various information to see that these 7 mountains are indeed all the way around Jerusalem. And the same way that they cover all the edges of this great city, God surrounds us - all the way around. The other interesting fact to me was that where you have mountains - you also have great valleys. And in general, valleys represent the low places of our lives. But in reality - these valleys added an extra layer of protection for the city - the city that is surrounded by mountains. For me as a caregiver, I needed to know today that He is...

Life brings us many days filled with many things. Living in the furnace (of caregiving) can get hot and stay hot. Sometimes that is the most difficult part - the fact that there is no real relief. Getting out for a few hours can bring a little relief, and much needed breaks - but then we still have to come back to an unchanging furnace. What a trial of faith... yet we just keep going; putting one foot in front of the other. Isn't that what it's all about? Just keeping on moving no matter what comes our way - no matter what our days look like - no matter what we must face today...that's faith.  We are to be examples of faith and believing even in the furnace. Actually, without the furnace to try our faith we would not be able to recognize it as such. Having faith means that we do keep going no matter what we see, no matter what we feel, no matter what is going on around us. We just continue to stand...because we have Holy Spirit in us to strengthen us and carry us on thro...

For the caregiver we never know what types of situations may be presented to us, on any given day. But then of course, our regular day is filled with all sorts of stuff too. There are so many things that must be done in the course of a day that each day is already full. But then there are those times when any little thing can set the day on a totally different trek!  It might be a delayed delivery, a cancelled doctor's appointment, an aide who did not show up, or any number of seemingly small or large difficulties that arise. Quite honestly, our days are difficult enough to handle physically, emotionally and even spiritually without any kind of unpleasant surprises. One thing I am finally learning is to not stress over the things that I cannot change. It's a difficult thing for me too - trust me.  But as I was reading along the other morning I happened across a scripture that I use to quote a lot - especially in my youth pastoring days. It's Philippians 2:14 and is si...

Last summer was the hottest summer ever on record in Oklahoma. The temperature was over 100 degrees for more than 60 days. Sorry I don't remember the exact number of days, but it was a very long time, trust me!  It was smothering hot and the times of day that should bring relief like early in the morning - just weren't working right. It was hot; and it was hot all the time. When I saw this scripture from Isaiah 25:4 I understood it a little better. The prophet says For You have been a defense for the helpless, a defense for the needy in his distress, a refuge from the storm, a shade from the heat. ...  When it is so hot outside you can barely breathe, it is great to be able to sit in the shade for a few minutes. You really cannot do much more than that since it's so hot. Many people get very sick when they get too hot; so it's best to just sit and be still when it gets hot outside.  For the caregiver - it can seem hot all the time due to the intensity of our tria...

If we are breathing we have experienced change. The caregiver has no doubt seen many changes in their lives that have brought them into the position of providing care for their loved one(s). As we age, things change. Our children grow older, they have children, our jobs change and in general our lives are lived on a platform of change.  The only thing that doesn't change is God; and His attributes. He remains the same as do His promises concerning us, His children. Ephesians 3:14-19 reminds us of some of these precious, unchanging promises. Holy Spirit lives in us. That is something that will not change for the believer. Paul prays in verse 16 that his readers would be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man. That is my prayer for caregivers, and His children today. May we realize His strength in us to carry out our daily tasks today - simply because He lives in us.  Verse 17 reminds us that Christ dwells in our heart. Do you see the common theme? He...

When I was a church-goer, I was a "worship leader." Psalm 95:6 was one of our favorite choruses to sing "back in the day." Come let us worship and bow down, let us kneel before the Lord our God our maker. For He is our God, we are the people of His pasture; and the sheep of His hand." I have used this particular verse to teach on worship for many years. When adversity strikes we can tend to think that the rules of engagement concerning our worship have changed. But they have not.  God still needs us to come and bow before Him in sincere and unadulterated worship. Worship is not just a song we sing on Sunday morning at church. It's a lifestyle of humility before God...that sometimes can be expressed in the words to a song.  It is so important for us to guard our hearts when we are going through. It is very easy to become hardened by life's circumstances. On down in this particular psalm, the psalmist discusses how the Children of Israel's hear...

Jesus was having a discussion with his disciples as it is recorded in John 14. In verse 19, He is explaining that the disciples would be able to see Him, but the world would not be able to see Him anymore. Judas (not Iscariot) asked the question that would be on anyone's mind. How is it that we can see you and the world cannot? That was Jesus' opportunity to begin retelling them the things He'd been saying all along. He spoke of loving the Father and keeping His word, how the Father would live in those who do that and the Holy Spirit's work. The he gives us verse 27. My peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful. (NASB) And to that we must say, "Wow!" It does not matter what type of situation we are in as caregivers, we can have His peace in our hearts. It is possible to be in this daily turmoil and walk in peace. Our world is a painful world; there are m...

One of my all time favorite passages is Psalm 46. There are several things that you can pull out of there to use! Of course, those who know me very well know I can camp out on Be still and know I am God. And the phrase the God of Jakob is with us is mentioned twice. But verse 1 I am pretty sure I memorized at a very young age and have carried it with me all these years. God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in times of trouble. This verse is usually one of the first ones my mind pulls up when trouble shows up. It has brought comfort and strength to me over the years. Earlier this week I was sharing a devotion on a conference call and this scripture came out during the teaching. And right then and there it hit me that He is a present help. I had always thought about it in the sense that He is present like He's here. He is present and ready to help. But as the words spilled out of my mouth I thought of it a little differently. The fact that He is present , He...

The caregiver's life is full....of caregiving! Our days are filled with assisting another perform their own SDLs. (skills for daily living) This can range from minimum assistance and supervision to complete 24/7 care. No matter what level of assistance we give, it's not easy taking care of someone else. We are very quick to put our own needs on hold to serve our loved one. In essence, we already lost our lives - at least the one we knew before - to care for them. And it's not always easy working through the emotions that go along with any given caregiving situation. So how do we deal with it ?  The first thing to consider is that Jesus put His "life" on hold to take care of us too! He left eternity to walk through time only to be mistreated, persecuted and killed. In His darkest moment at Gethsemane, He did not consider His own emotions, feelings, wants or desires more important than completing the task the Father had sent Him to do...and that wasn't for His...

There can be lots of things that nag at your mind and emotions throughout the day. It would be difficult to try to discuss them because our situations are so vastly different. Each set of circumstances that got us into the caregiver's role is unique...but there is one battle we fight that is most likely very much the same for all of us. That is the fight of faith. It may be very unique to me so forgive me please! But it seems this is one area that the enemy really likes to stir up a lot of the time. He would so like for us to think that we do not have faith or else we would not be in these circumstances. If we had faith then our loved one would not be sick or maimed. But this is simply not true. 1 Peter 5:8-10 talks about resisting the devil in his attacks. It says for us to be sober and also to be alert . We cannot let our circumstances lull us to sleep. We must pick up that Bible and read, talk to God, and stay very diligent in our walk of faith, especially from where we ar...

Do you remember the various games we used to play as a child that required we throw a ball? I can remember throwing a ball over the house with someone else. It was fun because you never knew exactly when it was coming back over or where it would come from or where it would land! I always prided myself on how easily I could throw the ball over the house. And I had a pretty accurate eye and arm when it came to throwing baseballs or footballs too! But when it comes to throwing my cares on Him it seems like I lost my touch!  1 Peter 5:7 says that we should be casting all  your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. This casting is not a passively handing or gently tossing action. It is forcefully throwing all the anxiety of my day, week, or life on Him. Why? Because He is going to do all  the caring for me! I can roll it all over onto Him and let Him do my worrying. Now of course it is only worrying when we are carrying our own load and trying to find our own way in ...

We all have questions about a lot of different things. And really, there is nothing wrong with asking those questions; whether or not we get an answer from Him! And on a personal note - I think it's best to be totally honest with God. Think about it, does it help your situation if you are angry with Him if you do not express your feelings? Suppressing what you really feel is not healthy, and it is not walking humbly before Him. I had a friend one time who asked how I could be so frank with God even when I was angry at a situation. My explanation was that He knew anyway...I just as well be honest!  This open honesty with Him about what you are feeling or even just how your day is going is part of being humble before Him. It will help nothing for us to come at Him shaking our fist! However, it is beneficial to humbly tell Him how you feel. And it is not a lack of humility to ask why? Humility is a quality but it is also a choice. We can choose how we want to walk before God. We c...

This little walk through 1 Peter has helped me sort through many of my thoughts. But this one verse helps me bring my perspective back to where it should be. Caregiving is strenuous on body, soul and spirit. Many days you have to just suck it up and give it all you have - even though you feel there is nothing left! One way to look at caregiving is to consider yourself a servant. We spend our days (and nights!) taking care of our loved ones. Depending on the nature of the situation we must perform various tasks of different levels of difficulty. Some just need assistance with skills associated with daily living, others maybe just need help with mobility, and still others need total care. Whatever our function is in the lives of our loved one - we can consider ourselves their servant for Christ's sake. He said there was no greater love displayed than when we lay down our lives for another. And we have done that. 1 Peter 4:11b says this: whoever serves is to do so as one who is ...

On any given day the frustrations can mount! (maybe it's just me....) You actually schedule a quick trip to the store to grab a few items and the aid doesn't show! Or you plan an outing and your loved one is not up to par. Maybe you've called the doctor and they did not return your phone call. For me it can be the fact that my son didn't eat at all, or he will not cooperate with his exercises! Some things that seem like small things can add up to be huge on days when tensions run tight! (like spilling the bath water, tripping over a rug that's been there for months or forgetting where you put the box cutter the day supplies come in! lol!) If we are not careful there are so many things to do any given day that we can live life wound up like a taut rubber band. Trying to maintain a quiet spirit is something we might laugh at!  But in 1 Peter 3:4 the apostle says that a gentle and quiet spirit is precious in the sight of God ...This attitude is what we are to be ado...

One thing that really surprised me when I began the walk of a caregiver was the rejection. We try not to take it personal by telling ourselves it's not on purpose, just that people do not quite know what to do with us. We do not fit the normal mode. We cannot always just get up and go out for a cup of coffee, grab a quick brunch with a friend or attend church like we used to. But we still have the same desires and need for friendships and relationships as those who are not caregivers. Rarely does someone cross that line and actually bring us  lunch or a cup of coffee. And there are few (and I thank God for them!) who will come and sit for a few minutes just to chat. But overall there is this rejection that must be dealt with.  We are in good company. 1 Peter 2:4 has this to say of Christ: and coming to Him as to a living stone which has been rejected by men , but is choice and precious in the sight of God ... Jesus had crowds of people following Him until He hit what was p...

Along the journey of caregiving there are many disappointments. I have heard it said that when tragedy strikes you find out who your real friends are. For me this has proven true, sadly enough. Many people are willing to walk through it with you for a time, but they cannot handle a life-long commitment. But then God seems to always send true friends who can be there even when you don't know you need anything! It is certain that along life's journey (caregiving or not) we cannot put our hope or our faith in people as they will disappoint us.  For that matter, we cannot put our hope in the medical profession either. There are some wonderful professionals that will go the extra mile and do all they can and a little more. But ultimately as wonderful as they can be they are not our hope. 1Peter 1:21 reminds us to keep our hope in God. No matter what kind of circumstances press in us daily - and for caregivers they can be many in a day - our hope must remain in the Lord.  Romans...

It is very easy as caregivers to get caught up in all the daily responsibilities and activities and get lulled to sleep by them. On one hand we are so busy there's barely time to breathe - but that can lead us right into a very sluggish spiritual state. Especially for those of us who cannot get out very much - it's easy to just sit back and become spiritually unaware. For us - 1 Peter 1:13 is a great reminder!  This verse is the apostle's reminder to the church to prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. And from there he goes on to discuss the topic of holiness and our walk before the Lord. When you are only at home most of the time it is easy to think you may be exempt from this verse. But we must remember that it is imperative for us to stay sober in our walk as it is always before the Lord,  not before man. Man will not ever be our judge - God is. For this reason...

When I read across this scripture in my morning readings today, I just had to share it. Now all caregivers may not be like me - but my whole world changed with one phone call. My life was jerked away from me in an instant. And although that has been very traumatic in every way possible one good thing is that all my religious thinking has been just as shaken. That's why I so enjoyed my meditations on this verse this morning.  1 Peter 1:5 says this - ...who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. This whole chapter is worth a good slow read- let it be absorbed into your heart and spirit. But this phrase sort of grabbed me because even though my world was shaken that part of me that is saved - my soul - is very protected by the power of God ! Think about that for a minute or two - your body did not get "saved." It's your soul that accepted Him and the changes living in Him brings.  And while we are still...